“Mum!”
“Yes, what is it?” She spun around from her position at the sink.
“Jess. I think she’s gone.”
“Gone where?”
“Gone. Gooone. Dead. He killed her. She’s—” My breath sawed in and out, stealing the words from my mouth.
“Sweetheart, slow down. What are you talking about?” The gloves landed on the sink with a slap as Mum pulled them off.
“Can you ring her house?”
“Of course.”
She picked up the receiver and punched in the number I gave her.
“It’s engaged.”
“It was engaged yesterday and Saturday, too.” I shook my head, eyes as wide as a scream. Tears blurred my vision.
I jumped as the phone started to ring.
Mum answered. “Hello.” Her forehead creased as her eyes fell to mine. “What news?” Hand tightening on the phone, her lids dropped closed and a tear slowly seeped out.
I leaned my back against the counter for support, the strength draining from my muscles.
“When?” She opened her sorrowful eyes. “Saturday afternoon. Are they continuing the search?”
Oh, God. They haven’t found her yet.
“No, she’s right here. I’ll let her know. Thanks.” Her mouth curled in a weak smile. “I love you too. Don’t forget to pick up Bree at three. See you later.” She placed the handset down and cleared her throat.
I held my breath.
“That was Peter. He saw Jess’s mum in town. Jess stormed off on Saturday afternoon and hasn’t been seen since. They don’t know where she is.”
I do.
Not her body. But I knew where her spirit was. If there even was a heaven.
“I need to tell the police what she told me about the creeper.”
“His name is Cameron.” Her tone held disapproval.
I didn’t care. He’d made Jess uncomfortable. That was enough for me to put a big goddamn spotlight in his face and handcuffs on his wrists.
“Leona told Peter they’d spent the morning in Yeppoon and had only been home for an hour when they had an argument and Jess left. She said she wouldn’t be back. Apparently, she’s done this before. They’ve been driving around looking for her. He hasn’t left Leona’s side, honey.”
“That’s her story.”
Mum tilted her head, her bottom lip puffing out before pulling me in for a hug. “Leona is a mess. Do you really think she’d cover up for someone if she knew they’d hurt her baby? Not a chance. Honey, let the police do their jobs. Hopefully they’ll find her quickly. She may even come back on her own.”
No, she won’t.
She can’t.
God, I was so confused and frustrated. If he didn’t do it, who did?
Rage boiled behind my skull. I needed answers. I needed someone to pay. I needed my friend to be okay.
It didn’t look like any of those needs would be fulfilled.
Jess was gone. And no one could get her back no matter how long they searched.
A ringing took over my hearing like the receiver in my head had switched channels. The floor wavered under my feet. I was thankful Mum was holding me or I might’ve fallen in a heap.
“Hey, what’s going on?” Stewart crossed to the fridge.
Mum lifted her head. “I think it’d be best if your friends went home for now, Stew.”
“Why?” He stuck his head in the door, cold air curling at his feet in a mist.
“Because something bad has happened and your sister needs quiet.” Mum raised her voice.
“What happened?” His head popped up.
“Stewart, just do as I ask or I’ll kick them out myself.”
“Okay, damn.” He lowered his head again, reaching in for the milk.
“Stewart!”
“I’m doing it. Just let me have a drink first.”
She let go of me and marched to the lounge. Stewart dumped the milk carton on the bench and chased after her.
I spun and held onto the bench, trying to decide what to do with myself. Jess was dead. I wanted to deny it. I couldn’t.
Decision made, I retreated to my room. I didn’t want to see Stewart or his friends.
We were all under the illusion that we had any control over our lives. We could try and force things, engineer opportunities to get us what we wanted. But if it wasn’t meant to be, it would be taken from us regardless.
There was a greater force in charge than any weak human attempt we made.
And sometimes that force was an unjust bastard.
Andrea
Brisbane, Australia
26th December, 2016, 1:22 a.m.
Oh, my God. This hurts like a bitch.
I cried out as the muscles in my abdomen clamped with a force I’d never believed was possible. Sweat dripped down my neck as the breath sawed from my lungs. I curled around my concrete uterus, under siege until the pain subsided, before collapsing back against the mattress. My arms and legs lay limp beside me in a strange, detached limbo as I tried to decide if I had the energy to move them.
My uterus was in control. I wasn’t.
Flopping my head to the side, I speared Ben with an accusatory look. He gazed back, blue eyes filled with pleading apology. Emotions broiled inside me with the ebb and flow of each contraction. So many that I couldn’t grasp them. I’d been at the mercy of my uterus for thirty-one hours and counting.
“You bastard—aargh.”
Shoulders seizing, I tipped my head toward my chest in protest at the excruciating agony surging through me once more. “It’s ... your ... bloody fault.” The words squeezed through gritted teeth, and between pants.
The midwife patted my leg, each tap shooting pins into my flesh, making me flinch. “You’re doing really well, Andrea.” She didn’t meet my eyes, and her voice caught on my name as she watched the monitor beside the bed.
