I suddenly noticedthe position I was in as I straddled Darren, distress beginning toshadow me as I remembered the last time I had straddled him likethis. Things hadn’t gone so well for me then. I pursed my lips andmoved to get off him, but he grabbed my hips and held mefast.
“No, don’t run,”he said seriously.
“I’m not running,but the last time I straddled you like this, things did not endwell,” I told him honestly.
“Then don’tmisbehave this time and they won’t,” he replied matter-of-factly.“Now, answer my question.”
“I don’t want tocause a fight.”
“Then answer my questionand you won’t,” he said, that warning glare arisingagain.
“I …” I started toanswer but was too afraid to finish. I really didn’t want to end upback in my cage for angering him with myopinion.
I looked down athim with a blank face, though I was sure he could feel the sadnessthat clouded my eyes like a rainstorm. My eyes fell to his chest,taking in the dark gray tie that rested over his light gray dressshirt and suit jacket. As if noticing my distraction, Darren tookone of my wrists in his hand and brought it to his lips. His nosetickled up the soft skin of my wrist, tracing my tattoo beforekissing it gently over and over again.
“You don’t have tobe so scared all the time, Jaden,” he said softly, keeping his eyeson my wrist. “I won’t deliberately hurt you unless you give me areason to.”
“Yet you somehowalways manage to get me to give you a reason,” I replied withcaution.
“Yes, you do havea very sensitive fuse that’s easy tolight.” He smirked atme between kisses.
“No more sensitivethan yours.” I glared back.
“Yes.” He almostlaughed. “But mine is the one you need toavoid.”
“Yet mine is theone you love to light.” Ismirked back like the cocky little shit I was.
He chuckled at methen as his eyes roamed over my body. And then, before I couldblink, he rolled us over and I was back on my back, Darren nownestled between my legs while his hands rested on the grass at mysides. There was that gorgeous smile again. God, it made me liquefyinside when I saw it. This was his warm smile, the one that told meI was safe from the monster inside him so long as I didn’t feedit.
His lips found theunderside of my jaw and they made a sweet little trail up to myear. “Stop dodging,” he said softly. “Answer myquestion.”
I sighed, hopinghe would concentrate on something else other than the thing I knewwould ruin both our moods.
“Look at me,” Isaid carefully. Darren brought his eyes up to face mine, but therewas a dangerous look to them. Yeah, yeah, I told you to dosomething. Get over it. “And I mean really look atme,Darren. Have you ever seen a wild lion atthe zoo? One that didn’t grow up in captivity?”
Darren’s faceremained blank as he stared down at me, but I could tell he waslistening intently.
“You ever see thefire they once had in their eyes disappear when they remember howthey used to roam free in the wild? Hunting and running as theypleased only to be locked away in a small, barely recognizablehabitat for them to spend the rest of their tormented lives in? Yousee how that fire dies? That’s me. And that’ll be me for the restof my life if you continue to keep me like this. So do I think youcan make me happy? I’m sorry, but you have to understand my sincereskepticism.”
Instead of theintense glare I had expectedto get, I received the most smart-ass smirk I’d ever seen.
“Sounds like achallenge to me.” He grinned.
I shook my head,disappointed with his answer. Of course, everything was a challengeto him.
“You’re notlistening to me. I’m just a conquest for you. I know I’m the onlyone who’s ever stood up to you, and I know that’s what drew you in.But what happens if that day comes, when I’ve finally had enough,when I’ve finally given up and I become dull and roboticallyobedient? You will get bored of me and will eventually want someoneelse. Probably someone younger. I’m just a phase for you, and whenyou’ve finally won, you’ll move on to the nextchallenge.”
Wow, I couldn’tbelieve I said that, but sometimes my mouth just runs withwhatever’s on my mind. I had to learn to curb thatshit.
Darren lookeddown at me with a blankface, but his eyes said something totally different. Anger. Iquickly backtracked.
“I’m sorry,” Isaid anxiously. “I shouldn’t have said allthat.”
His eyes narrowed,and I felt chills rise up my spine. Fuck, I knewit.
“Don’t apologizefor something you’re not actually sorry for. The only reason you’resorry is for yourself because you know you’re in trouble,” he saidin anger.
“You’re right, I’msorry,” I apologized quickly. “I didn’t mean to analyze. I am apsychology major, after all.”
“You’re also verywrong,” he replied darkly.
I looked at him toclarify, but he just shook his head at me indisappointment.
“Do you have nofaith in yourself, Jaden?” he asked me softly. I squinted at himcuriously. “Do you really think I will break you down so badly thatyou’ll just retreat to something robotic and routine? No,” he said,shaking his head. “There are stages to this, Jaden, many stages.The road to perfection will be long and hard, but I know we can getthere.”
“And where doesthat road lead?” I asked.
“Our happiness,”he said softly with a genuine smile.
Ourhappiness …
I slowly shook myhead at him in disbelief.
Sodelusional …
“I know you don’tbelieve me now,” he said, tucking a strand of my hair behind myear. “But things will get easier. I promise. You have to trustme.”
“But,” I started,afraid to finish my sentence. “I don’t wantthis.”
“Not yet,” he saidsimply, tracing his thumb along my jaw. “But youwill.”
Darren then made amove to prove his point and fucked me in the grass. But it wasn’this usual routine because it was more as if he was making love tome than anything else. He was slow and gentle, taking his time withmy body, feeling and kissing every inch until I found myselfmoaning for more. I was worried about the guards seeing us atfirst, but Darren assured me his guards knew better than to watch.I was grateful because
