Darren’s eyesflashed with regret, but it was gone before I could barely registerit. He released a slow, even breath through his nose before hefinally spoke.
“I don’t plan to let you leave the estate fora very long time,” hesaid. “And even longer before I even think about taking you out inpublic, if ever.”
I nodded then,looking away as a small tear dripped down my cheek. I don’t knowwhy, but I suddenly felt more grief and hopelessness than I hadexpected. I shouldn’t have been surprised. Even if it was ten yearsfrom now and I had given Darren everything he wanted, he stillprobably wouldn’t trust me.
Darren’s thumbwiped the tear from my cheek, and I sniffed back the remaindersthat wanted to fall with it. “Why are you crying?” heasked.
“Because, even after I’ve given you everything, the marriageyou want, the sons you expect, even after I’ve sacrificed my soul to you, youwill still never trust me. And I don’t want to spend the rest of mylife hidden away from the world because ofthat.”
I looked up at himwith torment in my eyes. How could he expect me to live a happylife if I were confined to one singular acre of the world? I wouldalways remain a prisoner, no matter what my status was tohim.
“I don’t trust anyone, Jaden,” he replied. “That’s the world Ilive in. But if you’re afraid I won’t let you out in public becauseI don’t trust you, then you’re misunderstanding me. I’m more thanconfident in upholding your compliance in front of a crowd, butthat’s not what concerns me.”
I looked back upat him with teary eyes I fought to withhold.
“I want to keep you hidden because outside of these protectivewalls is a dangerous world I want to shield you from. My world iscruel and ruthless and once it discovers you, you will become atarget for my enemies. Unfortunately, your manifestation isunavoidable, especially after you become my wife, but what can besomewhat avoided is the threat that comes with it. Your safety isof the highest priority to me, Jaden, and if that means locking youaway from the world for the rest of your life, then so beit.”
Suddenly, I feltsmall, helpless, and vulnerable, but in myhead,I was none of these. I was strong,capable, and a total fucking badass when I wanted to be. But whensomeone spoke of me as anything but, as the complete opposite, ofsomeone weak and in need of constant protection, I felt like shit.I felt useless, like a child who needed watching to make sure theydidn’t accidentally spill the milk or trip over their untied shoes.This wasn’t me. I deserved more respect thanthat.
I supposed Ishould appreciate his concern, but it was just an insult. I wasn’ta child. I might just be slightly bigger than one, but I could holdmy own and Darren had to acknowledge that. Otherwise, I’d spend therest of his life, however many years he had left, proving himwrong.
ChapterNineteen
Wager
I wasn’t a hugebaseball fan, but the moment we entered the kitchen and I saw thegame on the flat-screen TV hanging on the wall, I was suddenly theDetroit Tiger’s biggest fan. Opening day was one of the grandestdays of the year and Jordan and I would usually skip out of work,go downtown, and get wasted for it. I’d threaten the guys who harassed us, and we’d have afantastic time. Times likethis, I missed Jordan the most. Whenever I needed a laugh, she wasthere with an endless supply.
Darren and I satdown at the kitchen island where two dinner plates were set. Thegame was at the beginningof the first inning and I leaned over the counter intently towatch, rubbing my temples to ease a headachethat was growing into a migraine. I wasacutely aware that if I happened to lean over too far, I wouldexpose my ass, and since I wasn’t ready to witness the bloodshedthat would occur from my exposure, I decided it was in my bestinterest to follow Darren’s rules. I wasn’t a fan of goingcommando, but I supposed at this point, I didn’t have achoice.
“Headache?” Darrensuddenly asked me.
“Mmhmm.” I nodded, closing my eyes.
“Why didn’t you ask for someaspirin?”
I looked at himdumbfounded. It had never occurred to me to ask him for anythingbecause somehow I always thought either the answer would be no or Iwould be in trouble simply for asking.
“I ... I didn’t think ...” I really didn't know how to answerhim.
“Would you like some aspirin?” he askedsoftly.
“Yes, please.”
He then stood fromhis chair and walked over to one of the cabinets in the kitchen.Pulling out a small white bottle, he poured some pills in his handand came back with two little white pills. I pinched the pills outof his hand and swigged them back with the glass of water by myplate.
“Thank you,” I said, setting the glass down and wiping mymouth.
“Jaden,” he said, taking my hands in his as he stood beforeme. “I don’t want you to remain under the impression that you can’tcome to me when you need something. Just as you have an obligationto please me, I have an obligation to take care of you. But it’smore than just an obligation, Jaden. I want to take care of you,but I can’t do that fully unless you’re honest with me. If you needsomething, tell me, and I will do everything I can to make ithappen. Understand?”
“Okay, I understand.” I nodded.
“Good. Now, eat your dinner and watch thegame.”
I looked down atmy plate, noticing the steak, bakedpotato, and greenbeans practically overflowing from my plate, and I was suddenly starving. The steak wasfantastic, and I chewed slowly, savoring the taste as I watchedCabrera score a home run.
It was thestrangest thing. One minute, Darren was chasing me down andchaining me to his bed, and the next, he was tender and sincerewhile giving me painkillers for a headache he probably caused. Icouldn’t figure him out. He was like a damn Sour PatchKid. Sour one minute andsweet the next. I had
