“Whatever.” He was right. I wouldn’t understand. I shouldn’t take my anger out on him. I worked on changing my tone. “What are you doin’ all the way out here?” I wasn’t sure I really wanted an answer to that question.
He took his eyes off the road to give me the same crooked, cocky smile I witnessed the other day. “I was on my way from the city.”
“The city, huh?” I stared straight ahead at the road, trying to act uninterested. My blood boiled for so many conflicting reasons. He drove me crazy in every way imaginable. I needed him.
From my peripheral vision, I saw his expression. It all but said he was omitting anything that happened to be true. “The city” didn’t narrow it down any! We had three cities within an hour of our rural town. Springdale, Oklahoma City and Tulsa were all right up the turnpike in either direction. Not that I really cared which city he was coming from but his lack of information drove me crazy. If I were being truthful, I really yearned for him to let me into his world. I really craved his... everything.
He didn’t respond other than scratching his eyebrow with his thumb.
The air was thick with angst and my irritation. Neither of us said anything for a few minutes. Outwardly, I hated him. At least, I tried to convince myself I hated him. The truth was... I didn’t. I was attracted to him. No, it was deeper than that. When he was around, my world felt whole. That scared me. I didn’t know this person next to me. I knew he was toxic, possibly deadly. For some stupid reason, I couldn’t seem to walk away.
Finally, I broke the uncomfortable silence which seemed to linger between us. “Did you come by my house the other day?” I asked, hoping to sound nonchalant.
“Yes,” he replied, coolly.
“Okay?” Elaborate was what I was really thinking. I was obviously going to have to ask since he has never offered any information. “Why?”
“To see if you needed a ride to work?” He glanced my way through the corner of his eye.
“I have a car,” I replied.
“Yes, but your car is stranded now, isn’t it?” His chuckle was low and seductive.
“It was working perfectly fine until tonight,” I reminded him.
“Sure, sure.” His tone showed no interest or emotion.
I wasn’t sure what his reaction meant, but I didn’t bother dragging any more answers out of him. Demien certainly didn’t offer, either.
“Well, here’s a question that you might answer.”
“Oh, yeah? I’m intrigued.” One eyebrow lifted as the left corner of his lips slowly moved upward.
“What is the word you call me?”
“It’s pronounced ‘zansha.’ That’s the closest pronunciation to English that I can get for you. It is spelled Z-a-n-j.” His tone was playful but guarded.
“Okay? First off, it’s a simple question, so why the attitude? Second, I’ve heard the pronunciation. It was in the note that you left me, so I’ve already seen how it’s spelled. Why do you call me that? What does it mean? What language is it?”
“What note?”
“The one you left for me several nights ago. Don’t avoid the real questions.”
“I didn’t leave you a note.” His voice hardened.
“I swear I found a note. It said, ‘Please forgive me Zanj.’”
“It wasn’t from me.”
“Oh,” I said solemnly. “Maybe I dreamt it.”
His eyes squinted as they turned cold. In a mechanical tone, he said, “Yes, maybe you did.”
“What does Zanj mean? What language is it from?” I asked, again.
He looked at me but didn’t offer any answer.
I guess I shouldn’t have asked so many questions at one time. The rest of the ride was quiet. He sang to the radio under his breath.
I lost myself in my thoughts. I mainly wondered what I was going to do about my car. I didn’t have money to fix it. I’d fix it myself except I didn’t have a clue about cars.
“Rest your mind, I’ll have your car fixed and sitting in your drive soon.” His voice was still mechanical and dry.
My vision was drawn to the darkness that surrounded us as my thoughts wandered off in a million different directions. I wish he would offer more information with any answer. It drove me crazy that he was so vague. The Hummer came to a slowed stop. I knew exactly where we were. We were at my house. I didn’t want the ride to end. I needed more of him.
I exhaled, dreading the loneliness that follows. “Well, thanks for the ride. See you tomorrow at work?” I slowly reached for the door handle.
Demien appeared at the passenger’s side door as I pushed the door open. “Let me help you out.”
“Thanks.” He shouldn’t have been on my side so quickly.
Demien slid me down in one smooth, tight motion. I felt his warm, wet body as mine slowly slid down past his. It felt nice; it felt right. As my feet felt the ground beneath them, he pressed me closer to his body. His eyes burned with desire. His hands slid down the curve of my waist to my hips, sending burning flames of ecstasy soaring through my veins. Our foreheads met in the middle.
Our breathing quickened as his lips found mine. His breath was warm and inviting. He smelled of cinnamon and woodsy, damp, dark, rich earth. It was the kind of essence that screamed all-man, pulling my body closer as he staked his claim to me. His aroma was sexy and rugged, overpoweringly intense. His kiss was extraordinarily controlled, but all consuming, which made my dreams feel much, much too real.
I pulled him in closer. I wanted his body to invade mine. I wanted him to experience every part of me. I could see
