"Not as innocent as you want to believe. I've stood and watched people be hurt." My thoughts rested on poor Sophia for a moment. She didn't deserve to be here, and yet I'd said nothing when Charaxos had arrived with her.
"Circumstances can make people hard."
"That's just an excuse people tell themselves when they can't bear the thought of what they've done," I shot back.
He chuckled. "You don't have much faith in people, do you?"
"You wouldn't either if you'd seen the things I'd seen. Life as a slave isn't exactly one of luxury."
"Other than the obvious, no one seems too mistreated here," he tried.
A bitter laugh escaped me. "That's what you think."
"Is it not what it appears?"
"When it comes to the higher gods, is it ever?" I asked.
"I suppose you do have a point there," he admitted. "Tell me what it's really like here."
"There's not much to tell. If you prove yourself to be useful, you can just about survive well enough. It took me a few hundred years to work out what I needed to do. But I was lucky. Some of the girls that come here don't even last a week." A shudder rippled down my spine at the memories. I'd seen too many lives taken. Not just by Seth, either. Some had taken their own instead of living any longer under his rule. I'd considered joining them more than once.
"The harem?" he asked.
"Yes. Though that's not even the worst fate." It went unspoken between us that the worst was what he'd just saved me from. I didn't want to think about what I'd be doing right now if he hadn't stepped in. My sanity wouldn't be able to take it.
"I'm sorry," he whispered.
A short laugh escaped from me. "If you didn't do it, then you have no reason to be sorry for it." Bitterness crept into my tone, but I couldn't help it. "But I wouldn't worry. There's so much pain in this temple. We're used to it."
"Why don't you just run away?" he asked.
"To what? Would any sane god or goddess take me when they know I've been one of Seth's playthings?"
"Has he touched you?" A darkness I hadn't expected entered Abu's voice.
"No. Not like that." Until today, Seth had never looked at me that way. And I wasn't foolish enough to believe that today's lust was for me. It was for the pain he caused and nothing more. "But I am his slave. I have the marks of it." And not just the ones currently marring my back, though they'd no doubt heal into ugly scars. I was lucky I wouldn't be able to see them.
"Of course they would. Do you see them turning you away?"
I sighed. "That's not how it works. They all had slaves at one point, didn't they?"
"Yes."
"Did you?"
"Once. Long ago. But I didn't care for the practice and freed the man soon after acquiring him." He pulled the cloth away from my back and dipped it back into the cool bowl of water next to him.
"Did he thank you for that?" I asked, trying to turn but being stopped with a gentle push from Abu's hand.
"I don't know. I tried to find him after..."
"He was probably killed," I said flatly. "That's what normally happens to slaves that run away. I've seen it happen." More times than I cared to think about. I should have stood up for my fellows then, and not waited until now to save someone. But it was too late for regrets. All I'd probably have done was shortened my life.
"Why would he be killed?" Abu sounded horrified, and part of me wanted to take my words back as a result. But he deserved to know the truth. To understand what a slave was risking if they ran away.
"When you have slave markings, no one gives you a second to talk. They act first and never dig into whether or not they've done the right thing."
He fell silent. No doubt letting my words and what they might mean in the long run sink in.
"I had no idea."
"Of course not," I bit out. Nobody bothers to learn about the lives of slaves. I used to believe it was because they didn't think about it. But I'd come to realise that it was more of a case that they didn't want to know. Condoning slavery was a lot harder when they knew the truth about it.
"They don't practice now," he said weakly.
"I'm sure some of them do," I countered. "I'm here, aren't I?"
"You shouldn't be," he said firmly, wringing out the cloth as if it was Seth's neck. "You're a goddess. You should be in a temple of your own, with priestesses to say your name and lend you the power of belief."
A bitter smile twisted across my lips. "Please stop with the goddess bit. I'm not one. I've been alive for thousands of years. I'd have shown at least some signs of it by now if I was."
"Thousands of years is just my point."
"No, it isn't. Demi-goddesses live just as long. Isn't that what most of the priestesses are?"
He pursed his lips, clearly wanting to argue but not having the words to. I didn't blame him. I could be stubborn when I wanted to be.
"I've known both kinds all my life, and I'm telling you that you're a full-blooded goddess."
"Then who are my parents?" I demanded. "What am I the goddess of?" I tried again. "Nothing. I'm the goddess of nothing. If I'm one at all." My voice cracked. How could he do this to me? To anyone? He was putting so much hope into my heart, and I didn't normally allow that. I thought I'd squashed out my capacity to dream millennia ago when I realised there was no way to escape without condemning myself to an even worse fate.
"You can be the goddess of dance..."
I laughed, but it soon turned into a wince when the movement pulled at the
