“Walk with me, Abbilene.” When she takes a step, his heart sighs in relief. “Tell me what’s going on.”
“I’m too ashamed, Father,” she whispers.
“Nonsense, the house of the Lord is the one place that is judgment-free. Here, you are safe in his arms. Tell me.”
Abbie tells him of the betrayal, the will and finally of the child. When she’s finished Pastor Jacobs sits heavily on the steps below the pulpit.
“Sit with me,” he insists.
Abbilene sits, and he stares at her for a minute. “I’m going to say something that’s going to shock you.” He takes a deep breath.
“I want you to put aside your feelings for a moment and tell me what your head is telling you to do?”
“What?” Surprise has her turning to look at him.
“We all go through tests, Abbie, battles if you will, and right now, you are under attack.”
“Why? Haven’t I lost enough?” She whispers.
“With every blessing the Lord has planned for us, there is always a battle. If you aren’t careful, you will forfeit what God is giving you.”
“Giving me?” Abbie shouts and leaps to her feet, no longer caring that she’s yelling. “A husband who was so disgusted by me that he couldn’t stay home.”
“No!” Pastor Jacobs snaps back, shocking her silent. “It was Burton’s guilt and shame that drove him away from you Abbilene. Do you believe that God only blesses men?”
“Of course not.”
“Good. Then you need to hear what I’m saying to you.” He jumps to his feet. “The Devil doesn’t care about your feelings or your heart. He seeks to cloud your mind so that you make the wrong choice. In fact, I say he’s doing everything he can to confuse you.”
“I hear what you’re saying, but this… hurts.” She fists a hand against her heart, “My heart is hurting,” she exclaims.
“Then give it a rest in the Lord’s hands and think!” Pastor Jacobs orders.
“I’ve never seen you like this Pastor,” Abbie says with a small smile.
“I’m sorry if I’m shocking you, Abbilene. The amount of attack you’re under right now has me curious. I can’t help but wonder just how big the blessing is the Lord has in store for you?” He grins and claps his hands in excitement.
“Why me, Pastor Jacobs? I’m no one. I’m just a store clerk, in Nebraska. Why attack me like this?”
“Wrong. Abbilene Gilbert, you are a daughter of the one true God, and he is desperately trying to shine through you. The question is, are you going to let him?”
Abbie falls silent and glancing up at the cross, feels her anger fade away.
“I want to, but what if I fail the child, Pastor Jacobs? How can I look at the son my husband fathered with another woman and love him?”
“Only you can answer that question, Abbilene. The fact that you even care to ask it tells me that you are capable of great love. If you need guidance, I remember a story about a carpenter loving a child that wasn’t his own.”
Abbie bows her head and lets the tears flow this time. “Thank you, Father.” She weeps unashamedly while he guides her back to the steps. He offers her a handkerchief and waits for the storm to pass.
As her tears slow, her hope grows. When she wipes her eyes for the last time, she looks up and smiles. “You’ve done it now, Father.” She stands and straightens her dress, pats her hair and glances up at the cross and grins. “I’m going to shock this town when I bring Mason home and tell them I’m rebuilding the Mill. I hope you’re ready for the battle.”
“I’m a warrior of the Lord, I’m ready and willing to fight at your side.”
“Thank you. Something tells me I will need an army at my side.”
Pastor Jacobs walks her to the door, and when she steps outside, he shouts behind her, “The greater the attack, the greater the blessing, Abbilene!”
She is laughing as she walks away.
Chapter 13
An hour after she left, Abbie walks back into Mr. Cochran’s office. The silence is instant when she steps inside.
“Please forgive me, Mr. Cochran, gentlemen. I was unprepared for the news you gave me. If you have time, could we start over?”
“Of course, sit down,” Mr. Cochran says and waits for her to sit.
She avoids looking at Tucker and Sterling, instead choosing to focus on the lawyer.
“Burton came to me, aware that what he was asking was highly unorthodox. The will was second to the true reason he came.”
Abbie nervously waits while he slides more papers towards her. “What are these?”
“Adoption papers. Burton was planning on asking you to adopt his son when he returned home. The will was merely a formality to take care of both of you in case something was to happen.”
Abbie picks up the adoption papers and traces a finger over Burton’s script. “I don’t understand. We fought before he left, he didn’t want to adopt a child,” her voice is hoarse from crying.
Mr. Cochran removes his glasses and rubs his eyes. “May I speak, plainly?”
“Please. I’m reeling here, Mr. Cochran. I need to understand. Anything you can tell me will help.”
“Very well. He was very emotional the day he came to see me.” Looking at Abbie, he can see why. “Burton never once dreamed of asking you to adopt his son. His shame was eating at him. He thought you’d never forgive him for his betrayal, until his last trip home. You surprised him, I think, and he hoped by giving you a child that you’d find a way to forgive him.”
Abbie doesn’t try to stop her tears. “This is a lot to ask anyone. To raise a child that my husband had with another woman…” she whispers and covers
