Only he’d do it slowly, not fast with a bullet the way Ian had done.
10
Kat woke after a particularly sharp kick to her bladder. She lumbered up and went into the bathroom to pee as the baby continued to kick. Johnny wasn’t in bed, but she knew he was home. He’d taken the rest of the week off plus he hadn’t come in to kiss her and tell her goodbye. He was always quiet if she was still asleep, but she knew when he kissed her forehead. She always knew.
She brushed her teeth and dragged on a fluffy robe over her pajamas, then shuffled off to the kitchen. There was a pot of coffee and a cup sitting ready for her. She put in some cream and poured her coffee, then headed for the great room. Johnny had plugged in the tree and turned on Christmas music. She knew he did it for her. She smiled as she passed through the room and walked to the front of the house where the dining room and his office lay. She could see him in the driveway, shoveling snow in his buffalo plaid sleep pants and boots.
She laughed softly. Other men might want to put on something more manly, like deer hunter camouflage or something, but not her Johnny. He didn’t give a crap what anyone thought. He shoveled snow in his Christmas sleep pants with Let it Snow written down one leg and didn’t flinch.
Kat returned to the kitchen to fix breakfast for them both. She could tell he hadn’t had anything yet because there were no pans in the sink, no toaster sitting out, nothing. Plus, he usually waited for her. She whipped up some french toast and eggs, finishing up just as he was coming back inside. She heard him stomping in the garage and then she heard the door open and the sound of a coat being hung on the peg.
When he sauntered into the kitchen in his sleep pants and gray t-shirt, she had to sigh. His muscles flexed and bunched as he walked, and he had a nice pump from all the shoveling. His face was a little red, from cold and exercise, and he smiled when he saw her.
“Morning, baby,” he said as he walked over and gave her a kiss on the cheek. He smelled like cold air and pine trees with a hint of coffee.
“Morning,” she replied. “I made breakfast.”
“I see that. But shouldn’t you be resting? You had a rough night.”
She moved away to finish putting the food on plates. “I know, but I’m not tired anymore. It’s part of being this pregnant, Johnny. Your body has all kinds of energy because you’re about to deliver and you’re going to need it.”
“Okay, honey.” He took a seat at the island and she pushed his plate toward him. “Looks delicious.”
She fixed her own and joined him. They often ate at the island, because it was big and convenient, but she’d already thought about how they were going to move to the table when their child was bigger just so she’d learn that a family ate meals together and talked to each other. No telephones at the table, unless Johnny had to have one for work. One of the things Kat had never had growing up was a nuclear family that sat at a big table and talked about their day while they ate dinner together. She wanted that for her kid. At least Roman would’ve had that with Peter and Ludmilla for a while.
Johnny’s phone dinged with a text. She didn’t miss the way he glanced over at it, like he really wanted to look, but if they weren’t calling him then it wasn’t an emergency. He palmed the phone and slid it toward his plate but didn’t turn it over.
“You can look, Johnny. I understand.”
He shook his head. “It’ll wait until after breakfast. Baby, the french toast is amazing.”
“I’m glad you like it. I was going to save it for Christmas morning, but we’re having a breakfast casserole while we open presents instead.”
He stopped eating and leaned over to kiss her. “I love you.”
She couldn’t help the way her body seemed to melt every time he touched her. “And I love you. This is the best Christmas for me in a very long time.”
“Me too.” He tucked a lock of her hair behind her ear and went back to the french toast.
Kat nibbled her lip as she toyed with her eggs. She had so many things on her mind lately, and she didn’t quite know how to deal with them all.
“What’s wrong, baby?”
Kat looked up to find him watching her. She loved how tuned in he was to her, how he just knew when something was off. She also hated it because it meant he could easily worry about her when she didn’t want to distract him. “Nothing’s wrong. I just can’t help but be a little scared about all this. Not the birth,” she added quickly. “Raising her. I don’t know how to raise a kid. I’m not twenty anymore. And I’ve never had a normal life. What if I screw it all up? What if I screw her up?”
Johnny tugged her chair over close to his and put his arms around her. “Honey, it’s more likely I’ll be the one to screw her up. I mean how’s she ever going to date with me hanging around, growling at boys and cleaning weapons when they show up?”
Kat snorted. “Oh boy, you would, wouldn’t you?”
“I would and I
