“How so?” I pushed.
“I’ve been shot before. How many times have you been kidnapped?”
“I don’t see the relevance; it is like apples and oranges.” I argued.
“You’re right, being kidnapped twice and nearly killed twice is much worse.” He stood his ground.
I could see there was no point in arguing. “How was your day?” I attempted to change the subject.
“Long. I didn’t like not being able to see you. You know that, right?”
“Ethan, you have to stop blaming yourself. There was no way to know this was going to happen. You can’t watch me twenty-four hours a day.”
“Yeah, well that doesn’t mean I don’t wish I could.”
“Me too,” I smiled. “Are you hungry? Have you eaten today?”
“Not really.”
“Not really, so you’re not hungry or you haven’t eaten?”
“I haven’t eaten.” He admitted.
“Come in. I have some dinner staying warm in the oven.” He followed me inside and sat down at the kitchen table.
“I can do that,” he said as I took dinner out of the oven.
“Ethan, I swear if you don’t sit down and stop treating me like a china doll, I’m going to do something drastic.” I shook the serving spoon at him.
“Like what?” He looked amused.
“I don’t know, maybe bungie jumping or something.”
“I’d like to see that.” He knew I was afraid of heights.
I put a plate in front of him and sat down. “How’s Logan doing?”
“It’s hard to say, he was a grump before the attack at the hospital.” Ethan observed.
“He did his best. He knows I don’t blame him, right?” I said.
“Doesn’t matter, he blames himself.”
“Seems to be a trend.” I muttered. I watched Ethan eat with some satisfaction. I had been ordered to stay home for at least a week. I decided to use the time to try and improve my cooking skills.
“Maybe I should talk to Logan,” I mused.
“You can try. If anyone can get through to him it might be you.”
“Maybe I’ll stop by tomorrow with some brownies or something.
“He’d like that I’m sure.” Ethan nodded between bites.
“What about you?”
“I’d love just seeing you.” He smiled and I thought about how much I had grown to love him.
“Mac called today.” I noticed he bristled slightly at the mention of Mac’s name.
“He just wanted to know how I was doing.”
“I bet.”
“Ethan, I’ve told you there never will be anything there.” I was a little sadden by the whole affair. Mac was very special, and I would always have a place in my heart for him. But he helped me understand that my heart always belonged to Ethan.
“You sure Mac knows that, right?” Ethan held my gaze.
“Yes, I was very clear with him that while I appreciated everything he did while he was here, you were my one and only hero.”
Ethan rolled his eyes.
“You want more?” I said taking his plate.
“No, I’d better not this late at night, I’ll never get to sleep.”
“It is terribly late so why don’t you stay here tonight.” I nearly bit my tongue off. The words had come out without my thinking about it.
“You meant that?” He cocked a hopeful eyebrow in my direction.
“Yes,” I couldn’t take it back now.
“I could sleep on the sofa.” He offered.
“Don’t be ridiculous. This house has enough bedrooms.” I laughed.
He didn’t sleep on the sofa or any of the guest rooms.
We went upstairs together. I felt awkward at first, but I knew Ethan and I were meant for each other. We slowly undressed and climbed into bed. As much as I would have been happy to make love with him, we were both tired and I’m sure despite his bravado his ribs were still sore. I was happy to fall asleep in his arms with gentle sweet kisses.
◆◆◆
The next morning I baked brownies. I made enough for the whole office and a separate plate just for Logan. Then drove to the FBI field office.
“Excuse me, Logan?” I said entering the office.
“Kay?” He looked surprised.
“Is there somewhere we can talk?” I asked.
The color drained from his face and he glanced at Ethan. I’m sure he was looking for help. I had told Ethan what time I would be stopping by in case they were busy.
“Why don’t you two go into the kitchen? I think here is fresh coffee.” Ethan offered.
That was clearly not the answer Logan was looking for.
I smiled sweetly. “Thank you, that will be perfect.”
Logan stood and pointed the way to the kitchen. He immediately went to the coffee maker which allowed him to turn his back to me.
I began unpacking the bag I was carrying. “I brought these for you I know it isn’t much. I was trying to think of a way to say, ‘thank you’”.
That got his attention. He spun around to face me. “Thank you for what?”
“For protecting me in the hospital.”
“Hmmpf.” He wasn’t buying it.
“You put up one heck of a fight.” I nodded to his hands which were still bruised.
He looked like he wanted to argue but held his tongue.
“Will you sit with me?” I asked pulling out a chair.
He reluctantly took a chair opposite me and for good measures spun it around, so he was leaning on the back of the it.
“Listen,” I started. “I know things didn’t go exactly to plan but what you did was amazing. You risked your life to protect me. I can’t even think of enough ways to thank you for that. I am so glad that you are okay.”
He blinked and just stared at me. “I didn’t protect you or save you.” His hands were in tight fists.
“Yes, you did because you delayed them taking me long enough that Mac was able to follow them and bring Ethan and the rest of the team to me before things went too far.” I paused and reached across the table. I didn’t touch him instead I laid my hand open and up turned in front of him.
“You made it possible for me to be saved.” I tried to reassure him.
He looked at me and then at my hand. He slowly released the grip he
