“Eden, it was really just coffee,” she said with a giggle, “I’m not as brave as you, you know with your bathroom stalls and all.”
That last comment had me spraying the milk I was drinking out of my nose and narrowly missing Aiden who busted up laughing. I cleaned up my face and clothes then threw the napkin at Aiden before swiveling to look at Jennifer.
“Sorry, I just didn’t see it coming. You and Aiden don’t seem like a likely pair at all. I mean, you are you, and well.” I took a moment to regard Aiden and tried not to let my underlying dislike for him affect how I felt. “And well, he’s a former, abusive drunk who tried to kill me under the bleachers last year. You’ll have to forgive me for expecting you to have better taste in men.”
I couldn’t help myself, the resentment I felt toward Aiden was just too strong. Acting like all was right in the world for Drew’s sake was exhausting, and I didn’t want to do it anymore. I shifted my glance from Jennifer and felt a short-lived pang of guilt when I saw the hurt and shame in Aiden’s eyes. I didn’t want to feel sorry for him so, I swung a leg over the lunch table’s bench and walked toward the salad bar. The sound of sneakers slapping the floor warned me that someone was in hot pursuit. I swung around to argue my point with Drew and instead came face to face with a grief-stricken Aiden. His gaze dropped to the ground, and the tension bouncing between us attracted the attention of the students around us. His sneaker squeaked as he toed the floor, and then he raised his eyes to mine once more. I saw the genuine remorse there as he shoved his hands in his jeans pockets.
“I’m not saying that what I did was right, it wasn’t,” he said in low tones, “ and I am not proud of what I did to you. I struggle every day with what could have happened if Drew hadn’t shown up when he did. When I sobered up the next day, and it all came flooding back, it was like someone else was running the show, and I was just along for the ride.” He cleared his throat and dashed the welling tears from his eyes. “I was horrified Eden, I knew I had a problem, a problem I couldn’t control. I needed to find a different way to deal with the grief of losing my brother before I hurt someone else. I could blame it on Clarissa, tell you it was her idea, but the bottom line is she didn’t have a gun to my head. What could have happened to you—that wasn’t worth trying to impress her. I’m sorry. I’m not the same person I was last year, I am not perfect, and every day is a battle, but I can promise you I’d never do anything to hurt you now that I am sober and clean. I guess what I am trying to say is that I was wrong, I know I was wrong, and I take responsibility for that.”
I didn’t know what to say because none of what he said made it okay. I still didn’t like him, but I could see that he was genuine in what he was trying to get across.
“I can forgive you, Aiden, but you can bet your ass I will never forget. I looked past his shoulder and saw Jennifer sitting on the edge of her seat. Her eyes were huge with the hope she felt, and I realized that he wasn’t just trying to make things right between him and me for him, but for Jennifer as well. He turned to see what I was looking at and then shifted, so I was looking at him again and pitched his voice low enough that only I could hear.
“Jennifer cares about what you think—what you feel, it matters so much to her. Eden, I care about her, I want to see where things go, but I also know she won’t date a guy her best friend hates.”
I saw the fear in his features that I might reject the idea altogether. If I did, it wouldn’t be like he didn’t deserve it. Looking past him briefly, Jennifer mouthed, please, and I zeroed in on him again, my expression indifferent and cold. The color drained from his face, and he cast his gaze to the floor in defeat.
“I said I forgive you, Aiden.” His face shot up and hope lit his eyes, “I don’t forgive people I hate, but just because I don’t hate you doesn’t mean I have to like you. If you hurt my friend, then you’ll be the one having to worry about me trying to kill you.
He nodded and said, “Thank you, Eden,” before turning and heading back to the table.
Upon looking over the salad bar, I decided, nothing looked appealing. The lettuce was starting to wilt, and the grilled chicken looked like it’d been grilled a little too long, so I made my way back to the group, sat down, and Jennifer slid half of her ham and cheese across the table to me. Her smile spread, and I chuckled.
“You know, just because I don’t have an issue with you two being together doesn’t mean I am gonna change what I said earlier. You and Aiden don’t seem like a likely pair at all!”
“Well, neither did you and Drew—but here we are. Besides, we aren’t a pair just yet. We are still testing the water. It’s still a little too hot to jump into if you know what I mean.”
“Hot, more like frigidly cold. I didn’t even try kissing her goodnight,” Aiden said, pointing at Jennifer with his fork, “for fear of getting slapped.”
“You wanted to
