Nev carefully sat down the jar of water and pouch of nuts and berries. She then skillfully placed the sticks on the ground. With two stones she pulled from her pack, she urged a small fire to leap eagerly onto the sticks. The warmth of the fire was a very welcome sensation for them both. She knew the smoke could potentially lead danger to them, but her desire to feel warm and dry pressed more greatly on her mind now. Nev grabbed a small rock that was nearby and one of the agner nuts from her pouch. She struck the nut with the stone. Managing to crack its outer shell, she carefully peeled it off and handed the nut to Wyatt.
“Thanks,” he said softly. Wyatt fought back his urge to ask her all the questions that dominated his thoughts. He wanted to ask her what had happened to her father, why she blamed herself, why she had built so many walls in her mind, and if she felt the same connection he did. Instead, he ate quietly and decided to give her the space she seemed to want.
Nev ate silently and ensured Wyatt got the majority of what she had gathered. He had, after all, almost died. She was also painfully aware that it was solely her fault that he was in so much danger. When she thought he was distracted, she would steal short glances at him. Wyatt’s hair was fully dry now, and the curls she had missed were back. Absentmindedly, she rubbed her fingers together. Painful memories of feeling his curls underwater were battling with the pleasant thoughts of twirling them with her fingers.
Nev sighed poignantly. She appreciated his quietness tonight, but she also found herself longing for his playfulness and the smile he usually gave so freely. Despite the many dangers they had faced since they met, his carefree and kind nature had brought a smile to her lips frequently. As she drifted off to sleep, his amber eyes and grin were the thoughts she held close as she curled up on the ground.
Wyatt watched her sleep for many long minutes. He studied her face and traced its lines with his eyes. Wyatt pondered how someone so incredibly strong could also seem so very fragile. He lay down close to her. With him between her and the cave’s entrance, he fell asleep as he watched the light of the fire make her red hair seem to glow.
A few hours later, Wyatt was awoken by Nev. She was flailing next to him and muttering in her sleep. He quickly scanned the cave for threats, but all seemed quiet except for the fading crackling of the fire, and Nev’s dream induced protests. Whatever she was dreaming about, it was clear that it wasn’t pleasant. Wyatt leaned over her and brushed her hair from her face. “Shh, it’s alright,” he whispered tenderly.
Nev’s breathing was sharp and quick, as she continued to clench her fists and lash out at some unseen foe. Her face scrunched up tightly, and she let out an emphatic, “NO!”
Wyatt gently grabbed one of her hands and squeezed it. “Nev, it’s just a dream. I am here. It’s alright,” he said gently. He then leaned down and kissed her forehead lightly. Wyatt watched her closely as she seemed to calm slightly, and her eyes flickered slowly open.
She drew in a deep breath and squeezed her eyes shut for a moment before opening them again. She could see the concern on Wyatt’s face and felt his hand on hers. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you or worry you,” she said, feeling ashamed and uncomfortable.
Wyatt simply smiled at her and replied, “No worries.”
His wording resonated with her probably more than he intended. No worries, she thought. She longed for that to be true. Forcing herself to give him a half-smile, she hoped she could alleviate any concern she’d caused him. Perhaps he deserved to hear what really troubled her. Or maybe she had earned the right to finally share her burden with someone else. Either way, she couldn’t. Being alone was how things had to be. With that, she curled back up and slowly fell back asleep.
As before, Wyatt watched and waited for her to drift off before he laid down. It was easy for him to sense the crushing weight she was carrying. He wanted to help her, but he knew she wasn’t ready to let him do that. At least he could be here with her if another nightmare visited her slumbering mind. Breathing deeply, he closed his eyes and let himself join her in sleep.
Chapter 11
They established a bit of a routine over the next five days. The pair would rise with the sun, eat, pack up camp, and then spend the day walking west. Occasionally, they would take a brief and usually silent break. When dusk came, Nev would find them a spot to sleep. She would then journey out alone to restock their food and water supplies. She’d managed to bring back either a squirrel or rabbit each night that followed their exit from the cave.
What she had not managed to do was to shake the nightmares that now plagued her sleep. She was exhausted to her core. Wyatt had put forth his best efforts to reassure and comfort her when she inevitably awoke in the middle of the night, but she always pushed him away. Nothing he or she did stopped the dreams unrelenting recurrences.
Nightmares had been a constant presence in her life for many, many years. Over the past few days, however, they had grown more intense. Suddenly they focused less on distant threats and pains and more on the immediate. Nev had gotten to where she could barely look at Wyatt without seeing the grisly images from her dreams. As a result, she did
