Rhodri laughed. ‘I hope you didn’t snore, and why not, it’s a nice night for a walk, almost tropical.’
‘That’s taking things a tad too far.’
They walked in silence for a bit with no noise other than their footsteps and the shushing waves below them.
‘Rhodri, Constance told me she had a son today.’
‘Really? I didn’t know she had a child.’
‘I didn’t either, and it’s rather a sad, long and complicated tale which isn’t mine to share, but her son was adopted when he was barely a week old. That’s the last time she saw him. She said not a day goes by even now that she doesn’t think about him and each year on his birthday she lights a candle for him.’
‘I’d imagine giving up your baby is something you’d learn to live with but would never get over.’
Isabel mulled his words over; they were an echo of what had been on her mind since hearing Constance’s story. ‘The thing is Rhodri, as I listened to her talk about what it was like for her to adopt her baby out it dawned on me that maybe I’ve been selfish.’
‘What do you mean?’
‘Well, I’ve only ever thought about being adopted from my perspective. I never considered how my birth mother might have felt all these years. I mean, I felt grateful to her for having me and that I got such great parents but I never went any deeper than that. I suppose I thought she would have just moved on with her life. But now, after listening to Constance and seeing how giving her baby up has shaped her life, I can’t stop wondering about her.’
‘Maybe you weren’t ready to try and find her before.’
‘I don’t know if I am now. I’d have to ask mum for my records and think about it—how would she and dad feel about me suddenly announcing I’d like to try and find my birth mother. It just feels so disloyal.’
Rhodri stopped walking and sat down on the seawall. ‘Isabel, do you love your parents?’
‘Yes, of course, I do. They’re my mum and dad, and if I’m honest, I even love that bloody corgi.’
‘Well, then that’s all you need to say to them.’
‘How so?’
‘Don’t over think it. Just because you’re expressing an interest in finding your biological mother does not mean you are going to stop loving your parents suddenly. We human beings have a great capacity for love. Even if they do feel a bit unnerved initially they’ll get their heads around the idea and understand it’s natural for you to have a curiosity to find out more about where you come from.’
‘I could have a brother or a sister or both.’
‘Yeah, you could.’
Isabel began chewing on her nail. ‘She might not want me to contact her. For all, I know she could have a life that I won’t fit into, and my file might be permanently closed.’
‘And she might have spent the last twenty-six years wondering how you’re life is turning out.’
‘What if she’s dead?’
‘Then at least you’ll know.’
‘Oh God, Rhodri, what if she’s awful? She could be a criminal or, oh, and this would be worse, on some reality TV show, anything—for all I know.’
‘Isabel, stop it. She won’t be.’
‘How do you know?’ Isabel paused in her pacing.
‘Because she had you.’
Isabel looked at him, and for a moment she thought he might lean forward and pull her toward him, but he didn’t. Instead, he stood up and said, ‘Come on. Let's head back. It's getting late, and I want to get up early. The end is in sight for the painting I’ve been working on.’
Isabel felt vaguely disappointed as she followed his lead back to Pier View House.
Chapter 43
‘Morning Constance, how are you today?’
‘I’m perfectly fine, Isabel.’
‘I bought you a wagon wheel and a packet of Maltesers.’ Isabel handed her the paper bag and sat down opposite her at her table in the tranquil Oceania lounge. ‘You don’t happen to know off hand of something that’s helpful for varicose veins do you? Brenda’s bunions are better, but her veins are playing up now.’
‘Two teaspoons of apple cider vinegar diluted in water sipped twice a day will help. As will soaking a cloth in witch hazel. If she applies the cloth to the affected veins several times a day, it will help ease them so long as she keeps it up. It can take a month or two to feel the benefits from it. How’s your little skin complaint these days? I haven’t noticed you scratching of late.’
She was a marvel, Isabel thought storing the information away. ‘I shall pass it on, thanks, and my eczema has cleared up with the horsetail tea and honey treatment. Touch wood—’ she tapped the table. ‘I haven’t had a flare-up since.’ The scene outside today was a moody mix of greys, Isabel saw turning her gaze to the picture window and watching what looked like fine rain beginning to drift in from the sea. ‘I hope that wind doesn’t get up. Mum’s coming over this afternoon, and she can go a bit green around the gills on boats at the best of times. I’ll bring her to see you, shall I?’
‘That would be nice. Is she bringing my little friend?’
‘I bloody hope not.’
‘Oh, Isabel, he’s a lovely little chap.’
‘You wouldn’t say that if it was your leg he took a shine to on a regular basis.’
Constance’s mouth twitched, and she took a bite of her biscuit eyeing Isabel speculatively for a moment. ‘I have a proposition of sorts for you.’
‘Oh yes.’
