And yet, he had abandoned her when she’d needed him most. It had been weeks since she’d been sold into slavery, and he had never tried to find her. Yet, Alarr had been there for her from the beginning. Even now, he was trying to find a compromise between them, despite his intentions of vengeance. She wanted to believe that she could change his mind.
Her feelings were a storm of confusion. To whom should she be loyal? To the man who had abandoned her or to the man who had saved her? She didn’t know what the answer was, not when she was caught in the middle between them.
Alarr had offered her freedom, as if he no longer intended to use her. Did that mean he had come to care for her? He had touched her like a lover, awakening feelings she didn’t understand. But if she allowed him to go alone, she sensed that her father would harm him. If Feann had gone to the wedding and was involved in the death of Alarr’s father, he would recognise him and possibly kill Alarr. She couldn’t allow that to happen.
‘I will go with you to Killcobar,’ Breanne said at last. Not only because she hoped to protect her father, but also because she didn’t want Alarr to die. She couldn’t put a name to her feelings, but she owed him her life. It wasn’t right to turn away from him.
Breanne walked alongside Alarr towards the water’s edge. The sun dusted the waves in a glittering haze of light. She removed her shoes and walked along the frigid sand. The icy water matched her mood, and she tried to think of what she could do. The truth was, she didn’t want either of them to be hurt.
Alarr trailed behind, and she paused a moment, letting the waves pool around her ankles. But the cold brought a new clarity to her thoughts. There was something she could do to protect him and still grant him compensation for his loss, if he were to agree. Alarr might desire vengeance, but bloodshed could be avoided in a different way.
It was a means of putting herself between the two men, shielding them both through her actions. Her nerves gathered up inside her, for she didn’t know if she dared to voice her suggestion. It was an unlikely choice, one he might reject.
She didn’t even know if it was what she wanted. But if it meant protecting two men she cared about, perhaps it was the best solution.
Breanne turned back to him as she walked through the wet sand. ‘This is not finished between us. I will not allow you to harm Feann. But I know of another way you can be compensated for your losses.’
Alarr met her gaze but was already shaking his head. ‘There is nothing that would atone for what he has done.’
‘Hear me out,’ she continued. ‘My foster father owes you for your injuries, and if he played any part in your father’s death, he must pay the corp-dire. The brehons will see to it that justice is served.’
‘He will never pay a single coin for my sake,’ Alarr said.
Breanne steeled herself. ‘He would if you become my husband.’
Alarr hadn’t known how to answer her, but Breanne pressed her finger to his lips. ‘Do not give me an answer yet. Only think about it. It may be a means of avoiding war.’
For her sake, he had held his silence.
After they returned to the fortress, Alarr spent the rest of the afternoon and evening working on one of the longhouses, turning over her suggestion in his mind. Why would Breanne suggest marriage between them? She knew his intentions towards her father. Did she believe that a union would bring peace? Never. He could not abandon his plans, even for her.
She had kept her distance from him for the remainder of the day until they returned to the shelter that night. Breanne turned away from him in their shared pallet, but he could tell from her uneven breathing that she was not asleep. Slowly, he drew her close until she was facing him. ‘Why would you believe we should wed, Breanne? Is there not another man you would rather marry?’
In the faint light of the oil lamp, he could see the uncertainty in her expression. Her body was curled towards him, and her cheeks flushed. ‘No one would have me to wife. Not after this.’
‘You are still a maiden,’ he felt compelled to remind her. Although he had touched her intimately, she was innocent in body.
‘They never searched for me,’ she said. ‘Not in all these weeks. Believe me when I say that no man of Feann’s kingdom wanted to wed me.’ Sadness and humiliation weighted her words. ‘I never understood why. Was I not good enough? Was there something I should have done differently?’
Alarr knew not what to say, for he didn’t understand her people’s reasons for abandoning her. Had Breanne been his betrothed bride, he would have torn the countryside apart to find her. ‘You would never want to marry a man who blamed you for your own captivity,’ Alarr said. ‘It would not have been a good union.’ He paused a moment and added, ‘Just as we are not suited to one another.’
‘My offer of marriage was about keeping the peace for the time being,’ she argued. ‘Not necessarily an alliance for the rest of our lives. Only until you are compensated for your losses.’
A temporary marriage, then. But he still believed that was unwise. For if he wedded Breanne, he suspected he could not let her remain a virgin.
He brought his hand to her waist, not really understanding why he had the need to touch
