Was that his heart drumming against her ear, or was it her pulse? She breathed in the scent of his cologne. Intoxicating. A warning light flickered in her brain, but she ignored it, wanting this rush that she was feeling to continue…
She lifted her face and at the brush of her jaw on his chin, he leaned down and a second later, his lips were on hers. They both froze at the initial impact, and then Ronnie felt the gentle pressure of Red’s mouth inviting her to respond.
She wanted to. Needed to.
Ronnie closed her eyes, immersed in such waves of pleasure that she thought she was spinning, airborne. She thought she heard her phone buzzing, but she ignored it. Inside, a hunger was gnawing at her, a hunger that she never thought she’d feel…
Her heart was thumping so loudly that she had to take a breath. Red’s lips trailed down her neck, each kiss activating a sizzle that radiated throughout her body.
His cheek descended farther, brushing against her locket.
And that was when common sense flooded her.
She stiffened and pulled back, forcing herself to ignore the flash of hurt in his eyes. She should have never allowed herself to get to this point. She rose and turned away from Red, trying to get her breathing back to normal.
But how could life ever be normal after tonight?
“I think—” she paused shakily “—that it’s best if you stay away from women like me until you figure out a way of getting over your past relationship.”
“I am over it,” he rasped, also rising.
“Over her, maybe. But not over her son…” She bit her lip. “You need to let go… Because otherwise, I don’t think you can move on.” She stopped as his eyes narrowed, his expression fierce. A sudden thought came to her. Red was attracted to her but inevitably pulled away, and Ronnie could see now that Andy was probably the reason. How could Red even contemplate the idea of another child in a relationship, when he hadn’t let go of Marco?
And perhaps there was even more to it than that…
She saw the muscles in his jaw flicking. He might not want or be ready to hear anything else, but she felt compelled to try.
“Red, can I just say something else? You mentioned that you were an only child, and that your parents had often been absent when you were young, traveling around the world.” Ronnie paused as his gaze turned sharply to her. She bit a corner of her lip. “Have you ever thought that…that maybe you’re not only still trying to heal from the loss of Marco, but also from the physical and emotional loss of your parents during much of your formative years?”
Something flickered in Red’s eyes, and Ronnie knew her words had touched a nerve. He was still hurting…
Ronnie felt his ache in her own heart. Imagined what he must have felt as a child. He turned away.
“I think,” she said softly behind him, “that accepting your loss doesn’t mean you have to forget Marco. Or feel guilty that you might have caused him to feel hurt over the breakup…”
She saw his shoulders stiffen. “There are people…professionals who can help with any lingering feelings you might be experiencing…and losses that go farther back…”
Moments passed and Ronnie wondered if maybe she had said too much. “I’m sorry,” she murmured.
Red slowly turned around to face her. “I never thought about it—all of it—in that way before…” He nodded slowly. “I might just see who I can talk to when I get back to Toronto. But what you said makes a lot of sense.” He held her gaze for a few moments. “Thank you, Ronnie.”
She nodded, and bit her lip. “It’s a lot to deal with. Look, Ginger is sleeping. So if you don’t mind, Red, I’d like to head back home. I’ll just take a cab.”
Red felt a lurch in his stomach muscles as he stared back at her. He didn’t want her to leave. Moments ago, Ronnie had offered her perspective on a condition that had previously seemed hopeless to him. He had been struggling with the challenge of letting go of his recent past. He had accepted the end of his relationship with Sofia, and maybe even with Marco, but Red hadn’t been able to stop thinking about him.
Accepting your loss doesn’t mean you have to forget Marco.
No, he didn’t have to try to forget Marco, he now realized with wonder. He could cherish the memories they had shared. His loss might still make him sad at times, but perhaps he could let go of his lingering feelings of guilt, and now move forward and allow a new relationship to develop…including one with a child.
And maybe Ronnie was right about his unresolved issues with his parents, and their connection to his loss of Marco…but he would deal with that later…
“No. I’ll take you home.”
But first he had to deal with what had happened between him and Ronnie earlier…
How had he ended up doing what he had vowed never to do? Kissing her like he had been stranded in a desert for weeks and she had just brought him water. He had to try to apologize. Red inhaled and exhaled deeply. “Look, Ronnie, I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable earlier. It wasn’t my intention.”
She didn’t respond.
“I’m sorry,” he repeated. “I—I just got caught up in the moment… Can we just forget it happened?” What a stupid thing to say. How could he forget any of it? And it
