There was no hesitation as Charlie kissed him back, her own hands resting on the nape of his neck, holding him tight as if she didn’t want to let go. All the sounds faded away and all he knew was them, just two lovers in the Eternal City. Matteo lost track of time, lost in the feel of her, the taste of her, this kiss and this moment. They could have been there for seconds, minutes or hours until the sounds of a large group walking past made them both jump and they drew apart a little shakily.
‘Come on,’ Matteo said unsteadily. ‘Let’s go back.’
Charlie didn’t demur, her fingers laced in his as they swiftly walked the half mile or so back to the Spanish Steps and their hotel. They didn’t stop for selfies or to admire the view as they walked up the famous steps, darting around groups of teenagers and families enjoying the warm summer evening, climbing in silence.
It seemed to take an eternity to reach the top, walk through the lobby of their hotel and take the lift to the top floor but finally they were back in the penthouse suite and Matteo drew Charlie out to the terrace. For a long moment they stood looking out over the city, her hand still in his as she leaned against him, her head on his shoulder.
‘This has been a wonderful day, thank you.’
‘It’s not over yet…’ he teased and kissed her once again. Her response was no less immediate, no less passionate than it had been on the street, but she drew away much more quickly this time and looked up at him, framing his face with her hands.
‘Matteo, it’s not that I don’t want to. I do, but I just can’t.’
Matteo inhaled, taking in a long deep breath, steadying his nerves, his hopes and his desires. ‘Charlie, you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to. I hope you know that.’
She laughed then, soft and low and a little shaky. ‘I do want to, I want to more than anything. But it’s not that simple.’
‘You don’t have to explain.’
‘You see, I know you want your memories to return in their own time and I respect that. But there are things you don’t know, important things, and sleeping with you, making love with you, when we…’ She stopped and looked up at him imploringly. ‘I just can’t, much as I want to. It wouldn’t be right.’
Matteo’s heart swelled with love for her, for her bravery, her honesty. He’d hoped for more time to win her over, win her back, but he needed to repay bravery with bravery, honesty with honesty. ‘I know, Charlie. I remember.’
‘What do you remember?’ she half whispered.
‘That we separated, started divorce proceedings, that I let you down. That I’m a fool who let you go. That I’m sorrier than you’ll ever know.’
CHAPTER EIGHT
CHARLIE STARED UP at Matteo, shock and relief warring in her heart ‘You remember? How…when?’ The words could barely form themselves.
‘Yesterday, when you told me that things have been difficult over the last year it struck a chord. All night I had vivid dreams. I don’t know if they were memories but this morning everything just seemed a little bit clearer; that’s why I went for a walk. I went through everything I knew and after I fell the clouds cleared and I remembered it all.’
‘I see.’ Charlie sat down heavily on the nearest lounger and stared at her hands. ‘Then why did you ask me not to even mention the past…?’ She began to feel a little bit sick as she remembered the earnest expression on his face as he’d asked her to give him some time. Was it some kind of game? But no, for all his faults, Matteo was straight as a die. He would never play with her like that; he wasn’t dishonest.
‘Charlie.’ He knelt before her, taking her unresisting hands in his. ‘I can’t tell you what a shock it was to go from thinking that we were about to get married to remembering the mess I’ve made of everything. I needed time to process it before talking to you about it. And…’ He took a deep breath.
‘And?’ she prompted him.
His grip tightened on her hands. ‘Carlotta, cara, the car accident, the reason I was in that car was because I was coming down to see you.’
‘You were? But why?’
‘Oh, Charlie. When I got back from New York and you were gone I told myself it was for the best. I agreed to the divorce because I knew that’s what you wanted. It felt like I should go along with your wishes, make the separation as easy as possible. I owed you that at least. But then I realised I would never forgive myself if I just let you walk away without telling you how I felt, trying to win you back. I needed to ask you to give me one more chance. I guess I was a little distracted, trying to figure out what to say, my attention wasn’t properly on the road.’
‘You were coming to see me?’
Matteo nodded. ‘Maybe it was wrong of me not to tell you this morning, and wrong of me to ask for a little bit more time. I just wanted to bring you here, to show you that I don’t always break my promises, that I can be spontaneous and put you first. I wanted to show you how our marriage could be, not how it was. I guess—’ he smiled ruefully ‘—I wanted to win
