chased with a fear of loss, but such is life. And I have a life again, a proper one. The fear is a thing to rejoice in. Proof that I can still love this deeply.

“Maybe we should get you out of your head.” She strokes my hair, gazing into my eyes. I want to swim in those blue irises, dive deep and emerge under a pitch-black sky, riddled with stars.

I steal a kiss. “Maybe we should.”

Another kiss, and she welcomes my tongue, making my cock throb with impatience. Her hand runs down my neck and chest, over my stomach and between my legs to clasp my erection. I gasp, the sound swallowed in the kiss. I fumble to return the touch, but she grasps my wrist, halting me.

“You’ve already made me come, remember? Let me spoil you for a little while.”

Kind words, but I hear mischief in her tone.

Let me torture you for a little while, I translate. The anxious virgin I met in March must have been a figment. The woman here on this bed with me now is too fearless, too eager to possibly be the same Caroly. My progress has been slower and more halting, but I limp steadily onward toward a functional life, her hand always there, guiding me.

The tender thoughts dissolve as she urges me to lie back, edging her way down my body.

I put a hand to her arm. “No. I’m too close already.”

“Just for a minute.” She’s on her knees between my legs, palms slipping over my chest, stomach, caressing my hips, my calves, up the insides of my thighs. I moan, helpless, and gather her hair in my hands.

The barest glance of her fingers jolts my cock. A stroke and I’m shaking.

“Just imagine how good it’ll feel,” she murmurs, then my crown slips between her warm, soft lips.

“Oh.”

Needing a distraction—a chance at lasting longer than a minute—I conjure the first time she did this to me. She’d wanted to try sooner than I’d thought wise, considering her inexperience. It ended in tears. Now the fingers wrapped around the base of my shaft are strong and confident. She swallows half my length in a breath, pure slick heat. No hesitation.

“Yes.”

I made you this woman, I think, and my pleasure folds in on itself, too strong and potent to ignore. I hold her curls loosely, following the bobbing motion of her head.

“Softly,” I beg.

It feels so good, so absurdly good, I have to laugh. “Where on earth did you learn this, beautiful girl?”

She frees her mouth just long enough to smile at me and say, “From a very patient man.”

Another minute I let her spoil me, then I know it’s too far.

“Enough,” I whisper. “Please.”

I’m released, as relieved as I am disappointed. I can’t stand to wait another second, but she escapes to tend to the fire, laying a fresh log on the pile. The flames rise and, as she returns to the bed, the fire glowing in my body spikes as well.

“Take off your underwear.”

She smiles, kneeling, and reaches behind to unhook her bra. It joins my clothes on the floor and before she can get her panties off, I’m fairly tackling her for the chance to strip them. They’re gone. She’s beneath me, hands on my arms, gaze on my face.

“I think it’s time,” she whispers.

I nod. She shifts her legs outside mine, tilts her hips. It’s so much like the moment she invited me to take her virginity. So like it, yet utterly new. She releases my arm to draw the side of her finger up and down my cock, and my sentimentality dissolves in a tide of lust. I lower my hips so my shaft is along her wet lips, and I start to move. She grasps my shoulders with a moan.

My attention is nailed between us, unbudging. This is so wrong, my conscience mutters as my flushed flesh strokes hers. With no latex veiling my cock, a flash of instinctual panic stiffens my spine. I’ve done just about everything a person can in bed, but this feels truly forbidden. Pornographic. It fills me with awe and shame and a hundred other exciting emotions.

Without warning, Caroly reaches between us, clasping me, drawing my head up and down along her lips. I curse, so shocked my arms nearly buckle.

“Let me feel you. Please.”

I nudge her hand aside and steady my cock. I take a deep breath, then another.

And I push inside.

She’s hot, soft, taut, wet. Everything I’ve been fantasizing about, multiplied. For the longest time I hold us there, my cock buried as deep as it goes, impossible to distinguish my pulses from hers. Slow as the moonrise, I draw myself out, memorizing every sensation. Back again, just as deep. I shift to my elbows and drop my forehead to hers, overcome.

“You feel so good. So, so good.”

“So do you.”

But she can’t have any idea how sweet this is. How slick and warm she feels around me, how utterly different this familiar moment has become, with nothing between us. Nothing.

My throat’s so tight I can barely get the thought out. “I’ve never felt this close to anyone. Ever.”

She cradles my head, kisses my mouth. “No?”

“Never.” I edge my forearms closer to her ribs, coaxing her thighs a touch wider with mine. “Does it really feel different to you?”

“Yes.” She pauses a moment. I know that look. She’s struggling for words that won’t make her blush too deeply. “The friction’s different. More…explicit.”

“Really?” I still my hips, smiling. She nods, and I ease my length back, nice and slow.

“Really.” She kneads my backside, tugging. I ignore the request, maintaining my glacial pace. This moment will only come once. Let us both luxuriate in every inch of my slippery flesh driving into hers. A rare occasion indeed, for both of us to be experiencing something together in equal wonder. I’ve felt this before, but it was so long ago and so taken for granted, I know it only as an intellectual fact. A more

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