“Don’t you want this?” He whispers.
I shake my head. “No, Josh,” I say sternly. “I don’t want this.”
I try to lift my body off the cushions, but he uses his weight to force me down. “But I know you like me,” he says while leering over me. “You used to look at me all the time.” I cringe as he kisses my throat and try to wiggle myself out of his hold. “Why don’t you want me now?”
“Because Josh, I just don’t!” I shout, hoping someone, anyone hears me. “Let me go!” I try to kick him, but he dodges me easily.
“Oh, come on Rachel,” he murmurs in my ear. “Everyone knows you’ve been fucking the bro hoes. Everyone knows you are a slut.” I still when I feel his hand unbuttoning my jeans. His hand sliding inside my panties. I sob and try to shake out of his hold. “Why can’t you just put out a little for me?”
I kick him again, slamming into his balls. He groans above me and I wiggle out of his hold, rolling onto the floor. I try to crawl into a standing position, but he grabs my leg and pulls me back. I scream while I grip one of the table legs.
“Stop being a pain in the ass, Rachel!” He shouts while turning me around and pulling my legs apart. His other hand unbuckles his pants and I try to kick him again. He falls over me and grips my arms, pain seeing through me as he shakes me. “Stop it!” He shouts.
I cry and try to push him away. Tears stream down my cheeks as I continue sobbing. I smack him and he grabs my hands, holding them tightly. “Stop it, Rachel!” I spit in his face and he flips me over, my cheek hitting the table leg. With another kick I connect with something behind me and go as fast as I can to the door. I hear him running after me. I need to run faster. I fling the door open and run down the hall, my pants barely remaining up as I continue running.
“Come back here!” I hear him shout as I continue running down the staircase.
I can’t stop running. My arms hurt. My eyes hurt. My face hurts. Everything hurts and I have no clue where I am going or whose apartment I am standing in front of. I knock on it frantically, shivering and rubbing my arms up and down. It’s so cold. I don’t have a coat. I knock again when there’s no answer.
“I’m coming, I’m coming,” I hear on the other side.
I glance over my shoulder, wondering if Josh is there. If he has followed me and will take me away. Light permeates behind me and I hear, “Rachel?”
I turn around, tears streaming down my cheeks as I hold back a sob. I see Lucas standing in the doorway with Seth and Hunter behind him. His eyes widen and I wonder if I look as terrible as I feel.
“Are you okay?” Lucas asks, his voice barely above a whisper.
He lifts a hand and I flinch, holding up my arms. Seth is coming up behind Lucas and he pushes him to the side. “Rachel,” he says, wrapping a blanket around me and pulling me inside, “are you okay?”
I burst into tears, unable to stop myself from sobbing into his shoulder. He rubs my back while the door closes and leads me to the couch. Seth kisses the top of my head and strokes my hair away from my face. “It’s okay now,” he whispers in my ear. “Everything is going to be okay.” He kisses my forehead again. “God, Rachel. I’m so sorry.”
I close my eyes as I lean into his hold, wondering for a moment if this is all just a terrible dream.
23
SETH
Black and purple bruises stain the side of her cheek and I see more going down the length of her arm. Her pants are unbuttoned and I have to stop myself from imagining what exactly took place. It will only piss me the fuck off more. Lucas is making some tea for her in the kitchen. The fact that we even have tea is another question I’ll need answered. But later.
I hate to see her like this.
It doesn’t help that the whole week she was gone I couldn’t stop thinking about her; constantly wondering if she was okay or if she found a proper place to stay. Once I thought I saw her walking through the town square and I quickly hid. But it was only someone who looked like her. I even thought I would run into her at work. I spent all of Wednesday night wondering what I would say to her only to discover that she changed shifts with Susan.
I should have felt happy, knowing I wouldn’t have to suffer through a whole four hours of her giving me the silent treatment.
Instead, I felt worse.
Before she even arrived at our doorstep I was considering having another bro meeting. Everyone has seemed so out of sorts lately. Ignoring each other. Not going to parties. As if we were mourning someone’s death rather than some bitch who seemed to be getting in the middle of our friendship.
In the end it really is all my fault.
I just didn’t want to share. I was acting like a fucking toddler. Even now, I hate that Lucas knows exactly what to do. He hands Rachel a cup of tea while Hunter offers her another hug. Meanwhile, I’m just staring at her like some fucking idiot. I push myself off the couch and run my hands through my hair. I pace back and forth, wondering what’s next, what we should do.
“Can you tell us what happened, Rachel?” asks Lucas.
Rachel is in the process of slurping her tea, but quickly stops. Hunter takes her mug and she sighs, leaning into the crook of his arm. Why can’t I be like that for her?
