A social worker entered. “Ms. Peterson, I have your discharge papers and instructions. If you’ll just sign and initial here.” She laid out the yellow papers for Tori’s signature and went over the instructions for the care of her wound.
After the social worker left, Tori smiled up at Ryan. “See?” Her mother would be furious when she got back here to find Tori had gone, but at least this way, she couldn’t try to stop Tori from leaving. “But now I have a problem. I don’t have a way out of here.”
She thought to offer Ryan an innocent grin and blink as if to give him a hint—something she’d done in the past with him—but she had to steer away from giving him the wrong impression. No need to remind him of their past. Still, why wasn’t he offering her that needed ride?
Instead, Ryan watched her. She never liked being analyzed. She supposed that was hypocritical since she did that a lot to others in her role as an agent. But being on the other end of that wasn’t pleasant.
Finally he said, “I’ll give you a ride. We can talk on the way. Where would you like to go?”
“Thanks. I’ll text Mom and let her know that I’m with you and I’m okay.”
“Are you really okay?” His wary eyes showed just how worried he was. His concern went deeper than what he’d have felt for a fellow human being, or that of a detective who cared about people and bringing justice.
Ryan still cared about Tori.
Before panic could swell, she tore her gaze from him to text her mother. “I’ll survive,” she said.
At least, she hoped she would. And she would survive being in Ryan’s presence, too. As for surviving the attempt on her life—would there be more attempts? Would one of them succeed? Her sister hadn’t survived when someone had tried to kill her. Tori almost sagged under the weight of loss.
A tear trailed her cheek as she stared down at her cell. She wasn’t sure what she was going to do without her sister in her life, but the truth was they hadn’t exactly been in each other’s lives that much since Tori had moved across the country. She’d told herself that they’d make up for lost time later, with phone calls or visits. That chance no longer existed now.
The knowledge that Sarah was gone, taken from this world by a murderer, flayed her and left her raw and bleeding.
She finished the text and looked up at him again. Waves of remorse and a thousand conversations she wanted to have with him rushed through her. Tori tried not to shudder. She didn’t think he’d missed that, because Ryan had always been sharp and could read people even when they tried to hide something. Especially when they tried to hide something.
And years ago, he’d had an uncanny ability to read her. Had that changed?
Fifteen minutes later, they sat in a booth at a coffee shop. Tori had suggested they have their talk over coffee. Ryan had obliged. Coffee ordered, Tori resisted the need to take painkillers. Her shoulder had been wrapped, and she’d been given blood. She’d heal, with or without the painkillers, and she wanted her mind to stay clear. Somehow, she had to toughen up and see her way through this.
Ryan studied her. Scrutinizing her again?
“Would you please stop?” She rearranged the condiments.
Frowning, he shook his head. “Stop what?”
“Please stop looking at me like you’re dissecting me. I’m not a frog. This isn’t Biology 101.”
“Sorry. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.”
“No? I see you making mental notes that Tori Peterson doesn’t like to be studied. I’m not a suspect, so you can quit with your intimidation tactics.”
He shrugged. Then he shifted forward in the booth, a frank expression on his rugged face. “I’m worried about you.”
“This is just a gash in my arm.” He had no idea yet of the real reason why he should be worried. She vaguely remembered the pain of that rocky outcropping gouging her, but at least she wasn’t dealing with a bullet wound to her head or her chest.
“What were you thinking, going over those falls?” He’d asked the question before and wanted an answer.
She kept her voice low and said, “It was not exactly my choice.”
The waitress brought their coffee. Tori poured half-and-half in hers. Ryan sugared his up too much for her taste.
“What are you saying, Tori? That you weren’t kayaking alone? That you didn’t go over the falls?”
“See, this is what I wanted to talk about.” She took a sip of coffee and let it warm her belly, then leaned back. She shut her eyes and calmed her breathing. Let herself remember.
Tori opened her eyes. “I thought I was going to die when I went over the falls. I fought to survive and somehow...somehow I did survive. I woke up and coughed up water. Maybe the couple who pulled me from the river revived me. I don’t know. But I do remember now that I said your name, Ryan.”
Deep lines carved into his forehead and around his mouth. “Tori, I—”
“I went to the river today to travel in Sarah’s path.” That, and she’d needed to remember what it was like to be on the river at the base of Mount Shasta. She’d needed to remember Sarah. “I’m staying in her house. I’m on bereavement leave now.” She held back the furious tears that surged unexpectedly. “So I went kayaking along the river. That’s what the four of them were doing that day, wasn’t it? They were camping and had their kayaks, so we know they had planned to go down the river.”
“Why would you torture yourself like that?” His expression twisted into one of severe pain. “Is that why you went over the falls?”
Her heart felt like it might just rip open at the realization that he really seemed to believe it had been a
