Her phone buzzed in her pocket. She broke eye contact to look at the screen. “Sorry. I should take this.” She spun around and walked towards the gate. “Nate. Hi.” She glanced back at Lank, planning to wave goodbye but she couldn’t help notice the frown still etched on his face and the deep sadness in his eyes as he watched her walk away.
“Why don’t you just come over here? We can cook something at my house.” Carli ended the call and turned to face Lank again. “I guess Nathan is coming for dinner. I’ll see you around.”
“Yeah. See ya,” Lank mumbled, his eyes cold, “Boss.”
The last word uttered hard, with a tinge of aggravation. She spun on her heel, turned her back to him, and walked out of the corral. Carli wanted more than anything to turn around and tell him she was sorry he had to give up something he loved. But she kept walking.
Chapter Eight
A rap on her front door reminded Carli she had invited Nathan over for dinner. In the middle of searching online newspapers for any mention of her birth father or his family, she quickly shut it down, jumped up from the laptop, and hurried to let him in.
“Time got away from me. What do you want to eat?”
Nathan laughed. “Well, what’a ya got?” He followed her into the kitchen. Stopping in his tracks, he turned around slowly. “I haven’t been in here for a long time. Your grandmother Jean was a character.”
“Tell me everything you can.” Carli slid into a cowhide cushioned barstool and watched him intently. He took his time and looked around the kitchen, every detail, every dish behind the paned-glass cabinet, every picture on the wall. He chuckled. “I remember this.”
Nathan removed a framed 8x10 photo from the nail and looked at it closer. “That’s me.” He pointed.
Carli squinted to see a little kid, all legs and a face in the shadows under a wide cowboy hat, hanging on the fence rail at a rodeo. Instead of staying behind the fence like everyone else, he was inside the arena. A crowd behind him bulged in the stands.
“That’s your Grandpa Ward on the bronc. Somebody dared him to ride it, and darned if he didn’t make it the eight seconds. He was a tough old coot. Your Grandma Jean met him at the gate, and she gave him an earful. I thought she was going to punch him. I’d never heard her cuss before that day.” Nathan burst into a deep, belly laugh that echoed through the quiet house.
“I wish I could have known them.” Carli wanted to hear stories, but she had to control her emotions too. Every time she learned something new about her grandparents, it added to her sadness and feeling of isolation as the resentment towards her mother grew.
“Go on.” She smiled, trying to hide the conflicting emotions that raged inside.
“I like telling you about them, but I’m not one to stay buried in the past, Carli. Just the fact you’re carrying on the legacy they left at the Wild Cow is a huge thing. You’re here now and we need to make our own memories.”
“It doesn’t seem that big a deal. Which is why I want to talk to you about another idea I have.” Nathan returned the picture to the nail. Carli followed him into the kitchen and watched as he dug around in the refrigerator. “You’ve got eggs, but no bacon. How about breakfast for dinner?”
“There’s bacon over at the cookhouse and pancake mix too. Sounds like a good plan to me.”
Chatting and laughing at more bronc stories involving her Grandpa Ward, they walked to the ranch cookhouse and found what they needed. It was nice being with Nathan. He always seemed so kind, willing to help with anything Carli needed. She felt safe with him, plus he was a good listener. But with Lank she felt exhilarated like her skin tingled and she was fully alive. He was so irritating at times. Why did she keep comparing them?
She remembered Lola had once told her how God intended humans to feel—living their dreams, enjoying life to the fullest, being everything He designed them to be, all for His glory ultimately. Lola and Buck had taught her so much. She was maturing in her faith, but she still was uncertain about who she was and why she was here in Texas. Why her young life had been such a mess and why her parents had abandoned her. There were so many unanswered questions.
As they walked back across the compound towards her house, Lank drifted into her mind again. She wondered what he was doing this evening. Secretly, she wished he was the one walking beside her now. There I go again. Always wishing for something I’ll never have. Parents. Grandparents. Her old equine business in Georgia. She really missed the young girls she had been tutoring. She pushed the past from her mind and tried to focus on the here and now.
Nathan found several cast-iron skillets and set them on the cooktop with a clang. “If you’ll get the coffee going, I can handle the rest.”
“It’s a deal, since I was the one who invited you over. I didn’t mean for you to have to work for your supper.” They both chuckled.
“Now tell me. How are the riding lessons coming along? Any clients yet?” asked Nathan as he lay bacon slices into a pan.
“Have you ever heard the term ‘at-risk kids’?” Carli found the coffee beans and filled the grinder.
“Fresh ground?” Nathan’s eyebrows shot up in surprise.
“Yep. I’m a coffee snob.” She tilted her chin and gave him a wide grin and then opened the package and took in a deep breath. One of the best smells in the world. “Belinda has been coaching me.”
“Belinda and
