Nathan was comfortable to be with, like a summer day, all warm and fun. It would be so easy to fall for him. As she glanced from her menu, he watched her, and their eyes met again. Unsure and questioning, he waited. Wanting something more. She wasn’t sure if she could give it to him. Avoiding his glance, she studied the menu.
After their order was taken, Nathan watched Carli take a long drink of her ale.
“What’d ya think?”
“About what?” Carli took a second sip. Not bad.
“About everything. The day. The art. Brad Travers. The ale.”
“Well, that’s a lot. I need another drink.” She chuckled. “First of all, this is tasty. You can’t drink mine.”
“I’m glad you’re here.” He reached across the table and laid his hand on hers. “I mean it.”
“I never realized how much this meant to you until I saw you talking to that artist. I had no idea how passionate you were about this sort of thing. So passionate in fact you go to great lengths to hide it from your family.” Carli watched a sadness reflect in his eyes.
“I make sketches sometimes so I can figure out an art piece that’s in my head. I love working with metal and wood, or the idea of it anyway. Sculpting, painting, I love all kinds of art.”
“That’s great, Nate. Do you have a collection at the Rafter O?”
“A few oil paintings of horses, but nothing significant. I can’t turn this off inside my head. I see beauty in nature, the colors, the textures. Don’t get me wrong. I’m proud of this land and the legacy my family has built on the Rafter O. I just don’t want to push cows for the rest of my life. Is that a bad thing?”
“No, not at all. And you don’t think your dad will understand?”
Before he could answer, the waitress brought their plates of food, and Nathan asked for another round of ale. Carli ordered the smallest steak on the menu, but it was still huge.
After the waitress left, Nathan continued, “My father is practical, all business. I’m the oldest son. He needs someone to take over the ranch when he’s gone. To tell you the truth, I think Angie would be better at the ranching business. She’s in the middle, third in line. When my sister Janie returns from the military, maybe the two of them would like to partner in it.”
“I admire you for thinking of them and the obligation you feel towards the Rafter O. It is a new era—women’s empowerment and all that.” Carli raised her eyebrows.
“My sisters love everything about the ranch. Both of them ran barrels, and the youngest, my little brother, Travis, is more focused on girls right now. It’s always been a given I’d step into Dad’s footsteps, just like he did and my grandpa and great-grandpa did before that. We have a long legacy of ranching that runs through the Olsen family.”
“You know some of my story, Nate, and I’m certainly not one to give advice. I put up walls and hide my true feelings from others and, ultimately, bury my own dreams from myself. I still don’t know what I want. I rejected the idea that I had any family, but then one day I discovered a family I never knew existed. And that’s when it hit me. I wanted to make this my home. Texas. And I always wanted family. As it turns out, I have ancestors who lived here for generations before me. They might be dead and gone now, but I’ve found a new family with dear friends.”
“I’ve told you this before, what you’ve done is admirable. It’s pretty incredible really, how things turned out for you. Buck and Lola love you like a daughter. And you don’t have to put up walls with me, Carli.”
“You can think that, but on the inside I’m a mess—unsure, scared, alone. I wish God would send me a sign to tell me I’m on the right path. I made the move to Texas, but now what? Should I open a riding school or not? With cattle prices holding steady, maybe I should buy more grass. Or not. I doubt every decision now, and I’ve never been that way before.”
“He doesn’t send you some giant-sized message like a lightning bolt, but little signs if you look for them. Small things that just work out to let you know you’re on the right path.” Nathan scooped up a buttery bite of baked potato on his fork and stabbed into a chunk of steak.
Carli studied him. On the outside he looked like the typical polished Texas cowboy, but now she understood that on the inside he was just as conflicted as she felt. “If I can do it, you can too. I guess what I’m saying, Nate, is that we should live our lives for ourselves. I don’t mean in a selfish way. We need to be true to ourselves, authentic people. We can’t live and act like some different person with likes, dislikes, and dreams that are opposite from what we truly feel down deep in our soul. You’ve got to follow your dream, your heart. Even if it sounds wild to other people.”
Nathan took a swig of ale. “You talk big, but have you contacted your birth father?”
Carli gasped and looked up at him in surprise. “That's kind of a low blow. I’m working on it, for your information.” She looked at her plate, pushing food around instead of eating. Truthfully, she wasn’t sure if she really wanted to meet the man face-to-face. She directed the focus back to Nathan. “You should be honest with your dad. I believe once he listens and understands, he’ll still be proud of you and one of your biggest supporters.”
“Thanks, Carli, that means a lot. Where do I start? It seems like I’ve been keeping my secret for so
