Shaun blinked several times and took a few deep breaths before easing the scalpel back into her patient’s brain. “Make it twenty and we should be able to remove the larger section before break.”
They worked for exactly twenty more minutes until Shaun felt her patient was stable enough to be left. Stepping back, she spoke to her team. “Ten minutes then scrub back in.” She glanced at her anesthesiologist, one of the best in the country. “You good without a break?”
He nodded. “We’ll be fine, she’s doing great. Go work the kinks out and we’ll get this finished.”
Shaun smiled gratefully behind her surgical goggles and backed out of the operating room. She removed her gloves, goggles and mask and tossed them in the hazardous materials disposal bin. She would have to start over fresh, but it was worth getting a few minutes of fresh air after a long surgery.
Shaun headed for the nearest exit, flexing her fingers to ease the stiffness. It didn’t matter how many surgeries she did, nervous tension always wracked her body. She managed to push the emotion aside until her job was completed, but the stiffness always got to her after.
She pushed her way through the exit and stepped out into the cool Montréal afternoon. Her mother greeted her on the other side with a wry look and a smile. She extended the lunch bag she was holding, and Shaun took it with a grateful smile. Since Shaun’s return to the city, Fatima had made it her mission to stalk her daughter. She wanted to be as close to Shaun as she could, calling often throughout the day and spending most nights in the guest room of Shaun’s townhouse.
Shaun had to admit that her mother’s vigilance was a balm to her soul. She’d been so screwed up after returning home from Prague that she hadn’t been able to leave the house for weeks. It had been Fatima’s patient, unquestioning, undemanding care that had pulled Shaun through her fear and depression. Gradually the nightmares subsided, and, after a few months, life returned to normal. Or as close as it was going to get.
They’d had one discussion about Jozef, which had gone so badly they hadn’t spoken about him since.
Fatima didn’t understand why Shaun refused to testify against him. She thought Shaun was being selfish by not wanting to help put a killer in prison.
Shaun had argued that she wasn’t needed to help put Jozef in prison, that there was plenty of evidence. She’d lied and told her mother she couldn’t stomach going back to Prague for the court appearance.
The truth was that Shaun couldn’t handle the thought of being a party to imprisoning Jozef. He’d been her lover…. they had been in love with each other. Maybe she was selfish, maybe she was a monster, but she couldn’t be the final nail in his coffin. She couldn’t think of him as a murderer, even though she’d seen it with her own eyes. The real Jozef was a blend of intense lover and hardened killer who felt remorse for the lives he took.
“I was starting to get worried,” Fatima admitted as she sank onto the concrete step next to Shaun, who was pulling a sandwich out of the lunch bag.
“It’s a complicated surgery. I couldn’t leave until I was sure the patient was stable.” Shaun took a big bite out of the pastrami sandwich and chewed hungrily. She’d lost her appetite for months after returning home and had lost enough weight to worry her mother and colleagues. Lately, she’d been eating and sleeping better, though she still had bad days.
Fatima sighed and nodded. “I know, and you were only a few minutes late. I just worry about you.”
Of course Shaun knew her mother worried, which was why she hadn’t gotten impatient with Fatima’s overbearing mothering.
“Thanks, mom.” She grinned at her mother and finished her sandwich as fast as she could, her mind on her incomplete operation. Surgeries, especially the complex ones, consumed her completely. Obsessed her mind. She loved pulling her patients from the brink of death and giving them a new lease on life.
Wiping her hands together to get rid of the crumbs, Shaun stood up, handing the bag back to her mother.
Fatima shook her head. “There are some carrots and a pudding cup in there. Keep it and eat after the operation. I’m sure you’ll want to stay until the patient wakes up, and who knows how long that might take. Bring the bag home with you.”
Shaun thanked her mother, gave her a quick hug and flashed her hospital identification card over the metal reader. The door lock clicked open and Shaun went back into the hospital. As she strode down the corridor, her mind back in the OR, she nearly ran headfirst into a man walking toward her. Barely glancing up, Shaun murmured an apology and stepped around the man.
Then his scent hit her; leather mixed with Jozef’s brand of aftershave. She looked over her shoulder and saw a tall man, around Jozef’s height, with dark hair, a leather jacket, jeans and boots, striding away from her. She froze, her heart taking flight and her body going into a cold sweat. Dread and anticipation slammed into her, stealing her breath.
He made it to the end of the hall before she was able to find her voice. “Jozef!” she called out.
Without pausing, the stranger walked through the door she’d come in and out into the cool afternoon. She stared, battling the urge to run after him. To look into his face and assure herself that it wasn’t Jozef in the hospital, in Montréal, Canada. How could it be? He was in prison, somewhere in the Czech Republic.
Slowly, she turned away and walked down the hall towards the OR, her thoughts on the mystery man. She knew it wasn’t Jozef. Her mind had been playing tricks on her since she felt safe enough to resume her old life. Whenever she left the house, she felt as though
