Emotion swelled up squeezing her chest. “Patrick…” She reached for his arm, struggling to find the words to explain how she felt for him, when she wasn’t sure herself. “I…”
He stepped back, letting her arm drop to her side. “This has nothing to do with how I feel. I need a team member to be one hundred percent here. Someone we can all count on and won’t disappear in the middle of a mission. Leave now, before your brother comes down. I have a car out front for you.”
She bit her lip, trying to hold in the flood of emotions. Despite feeling like she was abandoning her brother, her mother, her whole new family, she nodded and turned towards the door. Patrick was right. She needed to see Reed and know for sure. Walking outside, she wiped at a stray tear and promised things would be better next time she saw them all.
With tears swimming in her eyes she drove to a convenience store. Locking herself in the small bathroom, she stared at the beat-up mirror. There wasn’t time for tears anymore, she had a job to do. Going back into her country, she needed enough of a disguise to hide from electronic eyes.
She found the silicone pads that she applied to change the shape of her face. Those pads, under several layers of darkened makeup that was a couple of shades deeper than her natural tan, changed her face dramatically. With heavy makeup and dark black wig, even Reed wouldn’t be able to recognize her.
It wasn’t until she was on the plane that she acknowledged the pressure in her chest. What she was about to do, what she left behind… mulling it all over in her mind was enough to drive her crazy. What would she do once she got there? Would Reed be willing to come back with her, and would that even be possible? She didn’t have any papers for him. Or maybe they could figure a way to stay in touch, and they could be together later. Then she was forced to acknowledge that sinking notion that maybe he wouldn’t want to come back.
He may be perfectly happy to live the life he always planned on. Uprooting cost him a lot. More than she ever wanted him to sacrifice. Maybe he deserved to be left alone.
And then, coming back home, the memory of her father haunted her as well. This trip was going to be difficult, and in ways that went past the fake disguises, forged papers and silicone fingertips.
Chewing on the inside of her cheek, she finally ordered a TAB in her drink. Something to relax her nerves, but not enough to make her stupid. She couldn’t afford stupid, but she couldn’t afford to break down either. Act now, feel later. It was beginning to be a mantra for her.
She landed in a neighboring country and rented a car for the rest of the four-hour trip. She hit the rush hour traffic when she crossed into her country. The underpaid security guard glanced at her credentials as she scanned her fingerprints. With a slight beep she was waved on. “Thanks,” she said and turned to drive off.
With every mile closer to her home, the surreal feeling grew. Soon landmarks became familiar but somehow it was all different. She was different. Gone was the fear and intimidation the government instilled in her. Fear of VRs, fear of her future, fear for her father and family… most of what she remembered growing up was clouded by these perpetual fears. Now, she had tools that could drive that fear away, or at least put up a good fight.
With only a few hours of sleep on the plane, she grabbed coffee and food to refuel on the last leg of her trip. Then once in town she found herself back at her usual coffee joint and ordered a tall Mexican latte with enough spice to finally wake her up. Sipping her warm drink, she realized the odds of catching Reed at home right now were slim.
Inside the bag Patrick gave her was information on Reed and his mother. She still had the same job at the factory and now Reed worked there as well. A solid job actually, with decent pay. The government obviously forgave him for his role helping Ari in leaving the country. Glad he settled in nicely, she tried not to think of what this visit would do to him.
Since neither Reed nor his mom would be off for a couple of hours, she had time to waste. Trying not to think about seeing Reed, her mind kept wandering to the one place she didn’t want it to—her father.
He had been in a VR coma for years now. She’d finally gone to visit last year, when she’d snuck out from school. Risking much to see him, she had thought her ability in the VR could save him, could force him out of the program and back into the real world. His addiction had stolen much from Ari and their family. Not only did they not have a father or husband, but they had to pay for him to be fed in the program.
Even though Ari left her father in the program, angry and disgusted at his mental addiction, she wondered if he was still in the VR. If they weren’t there to pay the bill, would the government really let him die? They could pull the cable out of his neck, but they couldn’t pull his mind from the alternate reality it chose to reside in. Maybe they kept him in there as bait for Ari, like they did with Reed?
Even though she told herself over and over that it didn’t matter, she found herself heading towards the last place she knew her father was. Her father had died years ago, when he chose the program over reality. But part of her needed to know what happened to him in
