I know why they chose him. I don’t even know why I pretend not to. It’s because he’s just like them.
Loyal and vicious and a killer.
“I’ll always approve of a man like Seth being in your life.”
I struggle to breathe as excruciating pain clamps down on my chest. Everything in my father’s tone is full of hope. Hope for a future with a man he loves like a son.
“Here you are dating someone dedicating their life to the Empire when you’ve never approved. A bit of a shocker to your dad, sweetheart. A good one. Funny how the two of you got together all these years later. It doesn’t matter when I guess, as long as you’re happy. It makes me happy not to worry about your safety as much anymore, though, sweetheart.”
Tears prick my eyes. For once, I wish they would fall. My head feels so light listening to him rattle on; I might faint.
Shit, I’m going to have to lie to my father. He’s the last person in the world I want to lie to, and I can’t bring myself to tell him the truth, not when he sounds the happiest since he lost as much as me.
And to top off my shock, I’m certain Seth knows I won’t be truthful because I want Dad to think I’m trying to survive. That I’m going to be okay, the same as I want him to be.
Damn it.
It takes effort to fight my surprised expression as I turn around.
“Seth would have gone no matter what, Dad. You and I both know that.” There, that’s not a lie. Seth would do anything for my family. That I know to be true.
“Yes, he would. Still, in times like this, that’s when you need him. Rest assured, he won’t be leaving the city for a while. I hope the two of you find what your mom and I had, what Danika and David had. He’ll protect you. Keep you safe. I trust him with you. He’s a good man.”
That makes one of us. I don’t trust Seth at all.
I don’t trust myself around him, either.
That wine is sounding more and more appealing. I need an escape just to drink until my brain is forgetful, until it’s numb and not spinning out of control. Swear it’s like a tornado in there, ripping me to shreds, tossing me in every direction violently.
And Seth will whip it up more. The man will come on like a hurricane. I can already feel the change in the air. The frenzy that man will cause to my heart. Fueling and feeding my desire for him.
Dad stares at me for a beat, his lips twitching, the darkness in his eyes shadowed, and then I watch in amazement as he smiles. It’s slight, but it’s there. Everything that was said before this moment goes on the back burner as I watch, just like I did when I was a little girl waiting for him to laugh at something I said.
His smile is a sliver of hope smashing right through my turbulent emotions. It’s his first real smile I’ve seen in months. The last came when Mom made him get on the phone one day when she FaceTimed me. It’s so much more than I’d hoped it would be.
My heartbroken father is smiling.
At me.
For me.
I stand here like a statue, practically gaping. I have no right to lead him on in believing I’m happy. It hurts my heart to do so. It makes me want to tell the truth.
Suddenly, the smile disappears, and life’s cruelty sets right back in its comfortable place on my chest.
Tears well in my father’s eyes, there’s a slight tremble on his lips.
“It’s alright if you blame me, Victoria. I blame myself. Your father is the reason behind the murders. The reason your brother is in prison. I’m the reason someone targeted my family.” His voice strains in agony, echoing off the walls and knocking the air from my lungs.
I knew he’d bring this up too. It’s what I expected—the blaming himself, not at all. Knowing him, I can see how he would. I just wish he’d have brought it up sooner. The thought of him feeling this way for a month is unbearable to swallow down.
It leaves a lump in my throat.
“No, you are wrong.” Those four words are the truest I’ve spoken all day.
“I’m right, sweetheart. Are you going to stand there and tell me it’s someone else’s fault? They came after my family. They killed them in cold blood. My family!” he yells, lips quivering more now.
One second, Dad is smiling. The next, he’s breaking apart. I hate this for him. That smile was everything, and now it’s gone.
He’s about to lose it, and I don’t know if my heart can take it.
I wrap my arms around my body to hold myself together. I won’t fall apart. I have to stay strong for him.
I refused to cry at the funerals. I held Dray and Dad up while they broke down, wanting desperately to cling to Diesel too. He stood across from the graves. So close, yet so far out of my reach. We were told he could attend; however, we weren’t allowed to touch or be near him. They had him cuffed from hands to ankles, guards surrounding him, and wearing the same suit as the day he was sentenced.
Like me, he didn’t cry. He just stood there, gazing back and forth between the caskets, me, Dad, Dray, and his ex-fiancée, Amber. The woman he’s loved most of his life. Diesel let her go when he went to prison. The dumbest mistake he’s ever made. I’ve seen him a few times since then. He barely talks, so unlike the oldest Hughes child.
He’s the type that says what’s on his mind. He’s the darkest of us all too. Diesel will shoot someone on a dime if they’ve done us wrong. There are
