"Not who, what. He was a professional," Nik continued. She needed to know this. "He was paid to get to you." To kill her or worse. "The person paying him is still out there. He'll replace the man we killed this morning and it'll start all over again."
Guilt slammed into Nik as her face crumpled. "It'll start all over again." She laid her forehead against his, her trembling fingertips skimming over his face. "So many people died today and nothing was accomplished."
"Not nothing." He refused to think that. Ivan's death wasn't a waste.
"Yes, nothing. We didn't stop death. It's still out there and it'll come for me, for the people I care about. It always does." Her breathing was ragged. "You have to let me go, Nikky. You can't fight this war again and again, losing loved ones each time. It isn't fair to you, to the family."
Did she not understand? "You are my family, Brat. I'm not letting you go." Ever. "When Pavel locates the source, we'll confront him." Nik would kill the bastard himself. "And we end this."
"You really think we can end it?" She raised her head, hope lighting her eyes.
"I know we can." The professional had been tracking Tatyana for years. He must have fucked up at least once.
"We have a plan."
"We have a plan." She relaxed in his arms. "We locate the source."
"Pavel locates the source," Nik corrected. She wouldn't be involved.
"We'll confront him," the brat continued as though she didn't hear him.
"I'll confront him." With his men at his side and her safe at the casino. Today, he almost lost her. Nik wouldn't put her at risk again.
"Then, you'll take me to the Crown Hotel."
"No Crown Hotel." Again with her leaving him. "You love me." She said she did. Yes, she loved him. She must. "You're not going anywhere." Nik covered her parting lips with his.
She wasn't going anywhere. Tatyana curled up in Nikky's lap as the car turned into the casino. She said she wouldn't leave unless he no longer wanted her. She wiggled against his arousal. Nikky still wanted her.
And she wanted him. She wanted this. She felt safe, loved. But, those feelings were an illusion. She was neither safe, the killer's client not located; nor loved, Nikky her temporary fiance, but it was more than she'd had for years, so she took it.
The car stopped and Yuri, Grandfather's henchman, opened the door. Relief flashed over his normally taciturn face so quickly Tatyana almost missed it. "Sergei wants to see you." Yuri took Tatyana's hand, helping her out of the limo. "Both of you."
Nikky radiated irritation. "He'll have to wait."
"Nikolay," Yuri warned.
"Is that wise, Nikky?" Tatyana laid a comforting hand on his arm. Although he'd never admit to it, his grandfather would be worried. He'd want to see for himself that Nikky was well.
"It is necessary, Tatyana." Nikky's handsome face sagged. He must be exhausted. Neither of them had slept well the night before. "We lost six men today." A sharp intake of breath from Yuri. "Their families should hear it from me before anyone else says anything."
She hated death. Hated it. "Give me a couple minutes to change." She didn't want to visit grieving widows wearing a dead woman's maternity top.
"You don't need to..." He rolled his shoulders back. Tatyana heard a crack.
"I do." She rubbed his sleeve. "I'm your fiancee. I'll be by your side." She loved him. She wouldn't make him do this alone.
He gazed at her for a couple seconds, focused and intense. "Tatyana, it'll beȄ"
"I know." She hugged him. It weighed heavily on her that she had never done this, the right thing, look directly into a person's eyes and tell them they'd never see their loved one again, knowing all the while she was responsible. Today, she would, because once again, she was responsible. Nikky's men died because of her.
"And you'd do it?" He folded her into him.
"Of course." For him, she'd do anything.
"Nikolay," Yuri tried again.
"Tatyana and I have to take care of our family." Our family. She liked how that sounded.
"We'll see Grandfather after we're done. He'll understand."
The two women hugged fiercely, tears streaming down their cheeks, off their chins.
Tatyana cried as heartily with this sixth woman, Duscha, Ivan's widow, as she had with the others. Her grief seemed endless.
Nik blinked and tried to control his emotions. Pavel and Boris had already left the cozy living room, unable to keep their sorrow in check. Loved ones needed the assurance of strength, Grandfather always said, so they could grieve but not worry. It was the toughest part of the job.
Today, it was a little less tough because Tatyana was here. After he relayed the news in his deliberately short, curt sentences, she took over. She knew the right things to say.
All he had to do was hold it together. Nik stared up at the ceiling. He could do that.
"I worried, you know. From the first." Duscha sobbed, petting back Tatyana's frizzy hair.
The grieving women liked to do that, Nik noticed, treating her as a plaything to be cosseted, his normally prickly fiancee allowing them. "But Ivan was so proud of what he did. I had to let him do it. I couldn't change him. It was a part of him, of who he is...was."
"He was a hero." A wet smile from Tatyana. "He kept people safe. He saved lives." She gave the widow the much needed confirmation that Ivan had made a difference, that he'd be remembered.
"He was." A nod. "I only wishȄ"
"I know." Tatyana reached out to her as she broke down again. "I know." They wept in each other's arms. Nik counted rotations of the ceiling fan blades.
"You do know, don't you?" Duscha wiped her eyes with a soggy tissue. "Ivan told me you'd known sadness."
All the women mentioned that also, her experience with death linking them together. "I lost my parents, my family, everyone I cared for. If not for Nikky, for you," her hands
