“Trouble? No,” said Death. “I’m looking for friends.”
“Friends?” asked the man, taking another step back. And, for the first time, he smiled. “I can give you a friend for a hundred an hour, and I can give you a great deal. The rest of the night until three in the morning, only three hundred bucks.”
“Three hundred what?”
“Bucks. Dollars.”
“Oh,” said Death. He looked down at the ground and tried not to look too disappointed. “I don’t have any money.”
The man’s smile was gone, and he looked angrier by the moment. “Look, buddy,” he said, his voice rising. “What do you think you’re doing here, huh? What do you think, huh?” He started to walk towards Death with his arms outstretched. Death backed away.
“No, I just, I’m just looking for someone to—“ started Death, but he was cut off by another voice from behind him.
“Hey, moron.” Death recognized the voice before he even turned around to see the big man he had met earlier. His face was deep red and he looked unreservedly furious. “What did I tell you about going across the road?” He came within inches of Death’s face again, causing him to reel backwards.
“Come on now, Harvey,” said the shorter of the two, speaking around Death. “He just likes what he sees here better.”
The man named Harvey was angry to the point of trembling slightly, and Death thought briefly of running down the road and out of sight. But he was too resolved to make at least one friend that night. “Likes what he sees better? You shouldn’t even be around these parts, Tim,” said Harvey.
“I decide where I stay, Harvey,” said Tim. The two men forgot about Death for a moment and got very close to each other, putting on their most intimidating glowers.
“You’re gonna come back to my side of the road,” said Harvey to Death. “You’re gonna pick out a girl, and you’re gonna buy her services. Get it?”
Death thought about the proposition for a moment, but had to decline. He was just beginning to get to know Tim, he did not care much for Harvey, and he had never bought anything before and he did not quite know how. “I don’t know. I like this side better.” He smiled to show that he meant nothing by it, but Harvey was not pleased. He walked right up to Death for the third time, a vein throbbing in his forehead.
“You come with me,” said Harvey.
“He doesn’t want to come with you,” said Tim.
“Shut your mouth.”
“Yeah, I’d, uh,” started Death. He was trying to find the right words, since Harvey seemed touchy, “I’d rather just stay here. Thank you, though.”
“Why, you,” shouted Harvey, and he leaped at Death, who tried to back away but did not have time to react. Harvey wrapped his hands around Death’s neck, but his grip quickly loosened and he fell over backwards, stone dead.
“Oh, damn,” said Death quietly as all the women who were around let out shrill screams and ran every which way. Some hopped chain-link fences, others crashed into one another and fell to the ground after fruitless clacks of their high heels to stay upright. But, in the commotion, Death noticed that Tim could only stand there with his mouth hanging open.
“Dude,” said Tim, his eyes moving up and down Harvey’s dead heaping mass. Death tried to look innocent but it was useless. Tim continued: “That…was…great.” A smile broke over his face, and suddenly the tension in Death’s shoulders eased. Tim went to shake Death’s hand, but Death pulled away, playing it off as though he was tripping over Harvey’s unmoving legs. Tim did not seem to notice. “What’s your name?” he asked. Death was intrigued by Tim’s sudden change of attitude.
“Death,” said Death, smiling.
“Derek, huh? Derek what?”
“No,” said Death, shaking his head. “Death.”
Death thought he had enunciated it well enough until Tim said, “Derek Derek, huh? I’m going to admit, that’s a pretty weird name. Well, Mr. Derek, I owe you one, big time.”
“Please, call me D—“
“Right, I’ll just call you Derek. My name’s Tim. It’s really great to meet you. That was incredible.”
“Right,” said Death, or Derek, or Mr. Derek. He decided to just go along with it. “Good to meet you too.”
“What are you doing around here, anyways? You don’t really seem to be looking for a girl.”
“A girl? Oh, no, not at all,” said Death, glad to have cleared up the misunderstanding between them. “I was actually looking for a friend, and an apartment. I just retired and moved here, and honestly don’t have anywhere to stay.” As Death spoke he rubbed the back of his neck with his palm and looked down at his shoes. In a very human way, he felt slightly embarrassed, and was pleased.
Tim looked Death up and down suspiciously and said, “An apartment? Are you sure…are you sure you aren’t a cop?”
Death looked down at his suit as though it might provide a clue as to why he kept asking that question. “No, I’m pretty sure I’m not.”
“Come take a walk with me,” said Tim. “I owe you one for taking out my rival. I’ll be rolling in the dough because of this. Let me make some phone calls.”
As Tim talked on the phone, Death marveled at the city around him which, given his former career, he never truly had the opportunity to enjoy before. The city seemed to change drastically as they simply turned down different streets. Death and his new friend walked along a string of closed down antique shops that punctuated very large and expensive-looking houses. They turned right at the end of that street and through a dark alleyway. They walked by a man who was knelt down, shivering and staring at the moon as though it meant to harm him. The alley turned into a street that was bustling with nightlife and lined with pubs, each of which had different music coming from them, swirling together in the streets into one incomprehensible polyrhythm.
Finally, Tim stopped
