Commander Dalton took her other arm. Ena jerked it away. ‘How could you, of all people, think Henry has anything to do with Freda and Walter King’s spy ring?’ she spat.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
The day before Ena was due to go down to Bletchley Park to be debriefed by Commander Dalton, she went to RAF Grafton Underwood, near Kettering, to see Ben. The USAAF Eighth Air Force had been stationed at Grafton since 1942 – and it was where Ben and his boss were flying back to America from.
She arrived at the aerodrome late. Ben Johnson, she was told by a young airman who was part of Ben’s party, was in a meeting. He suggested Ena wait for him in the NAFFI. ‘I’ll tell him you’re here, miss.’
Ena was hungry, but couldn’t face food so ordered a cup of coffee. She hadn’t eaten properly since the day she had been part of MI5’s mission to snare Freda and Walter King – and Henry. It had been almost a month and she still hadn’t come to terms with Henry being a spy; she probably never would. Ena wondered who, if anyone, would tell his parents. He wasn’t in the services, so they wouldn’t get the dreaded telegram from the war office. Given the choice, killed in action was preferable to your son has been tried for treason and hanged as a spy. Tears blurred Ena’s vision. She shook her head, defying them to fall.
Ena had gone over and over in her mind what she was going to say to Ben, but whatever she said she knew she’d be breaking his heart. Things had moved so fast. She liked him, had begun to love him, but he wanted too much from her, too soon. Getting married and moving to America was a huge step – one that Ena wasn’t ready to take.
Jogging into the NAFFI, Ben pulled Ena to her feet and wrapped his arms around her. She winced. ‘What is it?’
‘My shoulder. It’s still painful from the pressure Walter King applied when he forced me out of the train.’
Ben looked at her with concern. ‘It’s getting better, though, right?’
‘Yes, every day it hurts less and the bruise has faded. It’s mustard-yellow now, it was black at first.’
Ben dropped his arms to Ena’s waist, pulled her close to him, and kissed her full on the lips. ‘I have waited for this day for so long, honey.’
Ena put her hands on Ben’s upper arms and gently eased herself away from him. He let go of her, and she took a step back. Looking around, Ben said, ‘The guy who gave me your message said you didn’t have any luggage with you.’ Ena opened her mouth to speak. ‘You’ve stowed your cases already, huh?’ he cut in.
‘You know I haven’t.’
Ben ran his hands through his hair. He looked near to tears. ‘So you’re not coming to the States?’
Ena shook her head and whispered, ‘I’m sorry.’
‘But you’re my girl. I want you to be my wife. I love you, Ena, I thought you loved me.’
‘I do love you, Ben, but as a friend. I never said I’d marry you, or go to America to live.’
Ben looked downcast, his shoulders slumped. ‘I guess I thought in time you’d grow to love me. I know,’ he said with renewed optimism, ‘don’t make your mind up now. Give it a couple of months. I’ll go over today, find us somewhere to live, and you can come over later.’ Ben took hold of Ena’s hands, his eyes pleading. ‘What do you say?’
Ena hesitated. She didn’t want to hurt Ben, but he wasn’t listening to her. ‘I don’t love you, Ben. Not in the way you love me. Marrying you wouldn’t be fair on you.’
‘I don’t care. I have enough love for the both of us. Hey?’ he said, a new desperate thought lighting up his face. ‘I’ll show you America. I’ll take you to see the Rockies and the Grand Canyon, and the Great Lakes.’
‘Stop it! Even if I wanted to, I can’t leave my family, my friends, my job, and move to the other side of the world. Not in the middle of a war.’
‘But I need you, Ena.’
‘So do my parents, Ben. I can’t leave them while my brother is fighting on the front line in France, and my sister is goodness knows where in the world. And there’s my job--’
‘Okay! Don’t come with me now.’ Ben cuffed his tears. ‘We’ll write each other, and if you still don’t want to live in the States when the war’s over, I’ll come back to England. We can get married here. We’ll stay in England if that’s what you want. We’ll live in Oxford; you’ll love it there. Or we could get a place near your folks. I’ll get a job here in England and we’ll go to the States on vacations.’
‘Stop!’ Ena cried. ‘Please don’t make this any harder than it already is.’
They stood in silence for some time. Then Ben said, ‘Are you seeing another guy?’
‘Not in the way you think, no.’
‘What other way is there?’ he shouted, his eyes narrowing.
‘I love someone that I can never be with. Someone who I will never see again. And if I did see him, I would turn my back on him.’ Now it was Ena’s turn to cry. ‘I’m sorry, Ben.’
‘I’m sorry too!’ Ben said. His voice had a bitter edge to it. ‘Sorry that you’re turning me down for that God-damn traitor, Henry Green?’
Shocked that Ben had guessed she loved Henry took Ena’s breath. When she recovered she said, ‘I am not turning you down for Henry. I’m turning you down because I don’t love you. You know, Ben, it
