a little kid. Was this what I secretly wanted?

I turned my head and opened my eyes. There was a pair of legs, crossed, sitting in the chair next to the bed. I lifted my head and saw Slide Step. He had been watching me. Was he next? Embarrassed, I turned my head around.

The pain was numbing, but my awareness had heightened. I wished I could black out and that none of this had happened.

Red continued to fuck me. How long would this agony Continue? Was Slide Step next and was he as big as Red? I was drunk and hazy, and hoped I wouldn't remember anything in the morning.

Gradually the pain lessened more, and then my entire body went numb. It was like being paralyzed, and I was afraid I'd never be able to walk again. Someone threw a glass jar and it shattered next to the bed. Red stopped and lifted himself up on his arms, looking out from the blanket toward the door. I heard whispering and Red said something, but I couldn't understand it. I was in shock, and everything sounded garbled.

"Oh, GOD DAMN IT," he yelled. I heard a wet smack and pain shot down my legs as he pulled his dick out. He jumped from the bed and went over to the door. I felt like I had the runs, but there was no way I'd make it to the toilet. I tried to wiggle my toes but couldn't feel anything.

I heard arguing. At first it was muted, loud whispering, and then there was yelling and shouting. I didn't know what they were saying.

"Get up," Chet startled me. He pulled the blanket from the side of the bed and told me to put my pants on. I couldn't move.

Someone came over to help me, but I couldn't look at him. They wiped my legs with one of the blankets and then helped me put on my pants. My underwear was missing.

I don't remember much after that. The next thing I knew I was sitting in a chair back in the card room where it all began. My arms were dangling on each side. I was blankly staring at Red and Slide Step, who were standing in front of me, yelling back and forth at each other. Red was saying something about, "He's gay, he likes it" and Slide Step was screaming, "I was looking at the boy's face."

Red stormed out and retuned a few minutes later with something in his hand. It was a shank, a prison-made knife. Slide Step walked up to him, pressing his chest against Red's, "What are you gonna do with that, stab me? You've got heart nigger, go ahead-kill me!"

Chet and Taylor jumped in and soon they were screaming too. I wondered where the guards were. I looked down at my lap and saw that I was drooling again. I wanted to wipe my mouth but couldn't. Or maybe I did. Their voices faded away.

When my senses returned, I was walking very slowly and painfully down the hall. Eddie was leading me into his single-man cell, which had a bed against the wall on the left, and a desk, chair, and locker on the wall to the right. There was a small window above the headboard.

"Quick, hide down here." He lifted the blanket and motioned me underneath. It was like a hospital bed, with high posts, a large towel and blanket draped over the footboard so that the guards couldn't see underneath.

I dropped to the floor and slid under the bed. There was a blanket and a pillow laid out on the floor. I believed he was hiding me.

"Take off your pants," he said, as he slipped in behind me.

"No," I said, and started to cry.

"Oh don't worry," he said, rubbing my cheek, "I'll suck your dick." He said it as if it would comfort me. "But you can't tell nobody," he said, "No one knows I'm like that."

He yanked my pants off without much resistance, and I faded out again, but the pain and pressure of him entering me brought me back. He was humping me hard, and I couldn't breathe.

"I'm gonna pee," I wheezed. "Please, Eddie, I'm gonna pee!"

He stopped for a minute and asked if I could hold it. I couldn't so lie stopped. "OK, but we're coming back," he said. As soon as I got out of his room I told him I wasn't going back there. He ignored me. "Don't worry," is all he said.

I stood in the bathroom, but I couldn't pee. I didn't know what happened. A few minutes earlier I was about to go all over, and now that I was standing at the urinal, I couldn't pee. I stepped back and went into a stall. I pulled down my pants and sat on the toilet. Someone opened the door to the bathroom and held it ajar. After a few seconds, I heard it shut, but no one had cone in. I tried to shit but couldn't do that either. The door opened, and again, I couldn't hear anyone cone in.

"Are you all right in there?" It was Eddie.

"Yeah, I'll be out in a minute."

After a few seconds, I heard the door shut. No one had come in again. I dropped to my knees and threw up in the toilet. I heaved into the bowl until there was nothing left, resting my head on the rim. The cold porcelain felt soothing on the side of my face and forehead. I opened my eyes and watched the small bits of orange, prunes, and grapefruit floating in the water. I reached up and pulled the handle. Now I had to pee. I closed my eyes and felt the water swirling in the bowl and my breath bouncing off the surface of the water. The room was spinning again. When I opened my eyes, I was back under Eddie's bed. I don't remember walking there. He was fucking me, and it felt like I'd never

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