Colm’s lips twitched into a smile. “There’s been a fair bit of blood spilled between our families, and the war hasn’t even begun, not really.”
“You still think it’s going to?” I asked. “It’s not too late to stop this. The Healy family has a good territory. You bring in plenty of money. No need to push onto Valentino turf.”
Colm let out a long sigh and ran a hand through his hair. “You probably don’t know this, but I wasn’t the first head of the Healy family,” he said.
“I thought you started it,” I said, frowning a bit.
“That was my father,” Colm said. “He doesn’t get much credit anymore, but he was the first one to bring all the cousins together and get them to work together. We had a big family, you see, and it’s only gotten larger over the years.”
“I’ve noticed,” I said, smiling a little. Tara twirled with Dean, who could barely keep upright.
“You could’ve been a part of all that, once upon a time,” Colm said. “If I’d been smarter, or been able to see further, I would’ve taken you in.”
“Instead, the Valentinos got me,” I said.
“I wonder about that.” Colm tilted his head. “You think they took you in out of the goodness of their hearts? Or because my family was growing, and it was a chance to poach one of my own away?”
I didn’t look at him and took a long sip. I’d considered that already. It was one of the first things I realized, back when I was a kid, and I also knew it didn’t matter. All that mattered was how they treated me, and the Don brought me up alongside his own son, and taught me everything I knew. It didn’t matter if the Don’s motives were selfish in the beginning.
All that mattered was where I ended up.
“Why are you here?” I asked finally. “If someone else spots you, I’m going to have to kill you. I’d rather not though, since it’s my wedding night.”
“I wanted to warn you,” Colm said. “And offer you a deal.”
“All right,” Ewan said. “Speak.”
“This war’s going to heat up, one way or another,” he said. “I can’t keep control of my family without trying to expand. They grow too hungry, and I’ve got too many mouths to feed.”
“Then that’s how it’ll have to be,” I said, shrugging slightly.
“The deal is this. If you stay out of the fighting, then I’ll leave your Don alone.”
I frowned deeply and tilted my head toward him. “What do you mean?”
“I won’t try to kill him again,” Colm said. “I think I could manage it, if I really tried. Your Don is smart, but he’s not careful with his own safety.”
“Not like you are,” I said, thinking back to Fergal’s head breaking into bloody pieces.
“Not like me,” Colm agreed. “If you promise to stay out, then I promise to only kill everyone else. Your Don will walk free.”
“I don’t know if that’s a good deal for you,” I said. “Killing the Don would win you the war.”
“Maybe,” he said. “But I think the war is the goal. Prune my herd of overeager cousins, and provide them with an outlet for all their anger.”
I grunted and shook my head. He was talking about fighting in the streets, all to amuse his family and keep the men from fighting with him. It was a fucked-up reason for a war, but at least it was a reason I understood.
“I’ll think about it,” I said.
“You do that.” Colm sounded tired, deeply weary. “I’m not a stupid man, Ewan. I know what you’d be like, if we went to war, and I don’t want you on that battlefield. I’d prefer you far, far away from it, and if I have to spare your Don, then I’ll do it.”
I only nodded at him once, not sure what else to say. He nodded back, turned, and walked off into the night. I thought about chasing him down and killing him with my bare hands, but I couldn’t know how many men he had hiding out in those trees. Maybe that was what he wanted from me, and this whole thing was an elaborate ruse to draw me off.
But I didn’t really think so. That had been a real offer, one made in good faith. He wanted a war to enrich and amuse his family, and he wanted me to stay out of it.
Which worked out fine, since I wanted nothing to do with what was coming.
I slowly walked back to the wedding. Tara grinned at me, kissed me, and tugged me off to dance.
I thought about Colm’s offer for the rest of the night. I’d have to talk to Dean about it, and see what Tara thought of the whole thing, but I knew what I wanted.
It would be painful. It’d mean giving up a part of my life.
But when I pulled Tara close during the last slow song of the night, the moon hanging high in the cloudless sky, I knew it wasn’t much of a sacrifice, considering what I’d gain.
And the choice seemed obvious then.
22
Tara
Two Years Later
I watched a pair of squirrels run down the side of a tree, either fighting or playing or fucking, I couldn’t really tell. They skittered through the leaves and disappeared down the hill along the rocky trail that I hiked most mornings. I breathed the cool, thin Colorado air, and kicked my feet up on a stool.
My belly bulged like a balloon. I kept one hand on it, waiting for the baby to kick. He’d been active all morning, and I loved feeling him. Every new motion gave me a burst of excitement, knowing that was my child there, growing inside of me.
Ewan’s car pulled up the long gravel driveway. I sipped coffee as he got out and carried the groceries over toward me. He stretched and put the bags down at the top of the steps, then stood admiring
