“Have sex?” I grinned.
He didn’t smile back. “They share things about themselves.” His eyes dropped for a second and then he looked back up at me. “There are things that we should talk about…things that people generally know about each other when they’re dating.”
I turned away, knowing what he was asking. He wanted me to open up to him, to share my secrets, but I wasn’t ready for that yet. I couldn’t tell him the things he needed to know.
“Some secrets are better left unsaid. There has to be a certain level of trust there. And if there’s not enough trust, those secrets can tear people apart.”
We stared at each other for a moment, and I could feel his need to ask or say something. I could see it in his eyes. He was so close, but then the lights flickered on and the moment was broken. He glanced away and stood, leaving the room. I got up to walk around the house, sure that the power would go out at any moment, but it didn’t.
“They must have fixed the power.” I cringed, hating that I had just stated the obvious, but things felt awkward now and I didn’t know what to say.
He walked out of the laundry room where the furnace was and nodded. “Yeah, I made sure the furnace started up.”
I could hear it kicking on and glanced around, wondering what the hell to say now. I just had to go and bring up that shit about secrets. Now he was probably wondering what all of mine were, and the longer I held out and refused to tell him, the more suspicious he would get.
He frowned and pulled his phone out. I caught sight of the very black screen as he lifted it to his ear and answered, like there was someone else on the line.
“Uh-huh. Yeah…Oh, shit…Right…Okay, I’ll be right there.”
Disappointment hit me hard, but I wasn’t sure who it was aimed at, myself or him. He had just faked a phone call to get out of here, but it was my fault because I had made the whole situation uncomfortable.
“Hey, I’m sorry, I’m gonna have to split. My brother has to go into work and his girlfriend isn’t feeling well.”
I nodded at his lame excuse, but gave him a reassuring smile. “I understand. Thanks for helping me with the groceries.”
“Anytime.” He nodded and then walked up to me, hugging me awkwardly. “Well, I guess I’ll see you later.”
He leaned in to kiss me at the same time I turned to kiss him. He ended up kissing my cheek instead and then patted me on the shoulder as he gave me a pained smile.
“Right, well, I’ll see you around.”
Code for I’m getting the hell out of here and I doubt I’ll see you again.
I heard the door close and I followed, locking it before closing myself off in the living room and wrapping myself up in the covers in front of the fire. As I stared at the flames, I thought of how different my life might have turned out. If only I hadn’t killed my mother. If only I didn’t have this huge secret about my father. If only Matthew…Shaking my head, I forced myself not to think about all the what ifs. It would drive me insane, and I already felt like I was losing my mind.
Andrew
I walked out of Lorelei’s house and sat in my truck for a good five minutes beating myself up. I was an idiot. When she said that shit about secrets, it was like she was talking to me. I thought for sure that she knew about the fact that I was investigating her, and I almost fucking said something. But then I thought maybe she was referring to her own secrets and it hit me that she wasn’t ready to tell either. She didn’t trust me. She practically said it as we sat there. She had secrets, but she didn’t feel she could share them with me. And if she didn’t trust me enough to tell me her secrets, what would happen when she found out what I was hiding?
And to make matters worse, I flaked out like a fucking coward, pretending Joe had called me so I could get out of there. I had a feeling she knew it too. What did this mean for us? How did I handle things from here on out? I had seriously fucked up, especially with that pathetic kiss and shoulder slap.
Honestly, things would never be right between us until she knew the truth. I just had to find the right time to tell her. With the storm over and the excuse to stay with her gone, I now had to figure out how the hell to proceed from here. Not to mention that now that both Carly and Kat had spent time with Lorelei, I needed to talk with them and get their opinions on her. Only that would convince Joe that she was safe to be around. If I couldn’t convince him, he would never accept her, and eventually, those fears would be spread around the rest of the family.
Taking a deep breath, I walked into Carly’s townhouse and smiled at Kat and Carly. Since Josh already knew about what was going on, I figured his house was neutral territory. I smiled and walked over to Alessa, picking her up off the ground. Holding her right in front of me, I grinned.
“Hi, Alessa. You’re getting so big.”
She grinned and held out her arms. “So big!”
“That’s right,” I laughed. “Soon, you’re going to be bigger than me.” I made an o with my mouth and she mimicked me. She was the cutest little thing. Sitting down on the couch, I held her in my arms for only a few seconds before she wiggled down off my lap and toddled over to play with some toys.
Josh walked in and slapped me upside the head. “You have
