“Well training and real life are very different, Steve. And you’ve never taken a life, so you have no idea. You might’ve been there that night, but you didn’t have to pull the trigger.” The reality was that she resented him for sending her in first. He thought he was giving her the gift of solving a big case, but she felt like he threw her into the national spotlight in one swift motion.
“I know, honey, and I wish it had been me. I wish that I could take that weight off of you, but I can’t. And if you would just see the counselor…”
She held up her hand. “I don’t want to see a counselor. There is no counselor who can tell me how to feel. I’m the one going through it! I don’t want to talk about this anymore or think about this anymore. I just want to move on with my life.“
“I don’t understand. Why would you come to this little island where you don’t know anybody?”
“That’s exactly the reason why I’m here. I wanted a new job and new friends. I just can’t go back. I needed to become a new version of myself, and it’s working for me. I’m happy here. Well, as happy as I can be right now.“
He looked stunned. “How can you say that? We’ve been together for three years. We had plans, Emma. We were going to retire from the force together in a few years and travel. We were talking about opening our own security company.”
She felt bad for him. He was so torn up inside, and she just wasn’t. She felt almost nothing. She had loved him once, but now when she looked at him all she saw was her old life and she just couldn’t conjure up romantic feelings anymore. She walked over to her purse and opened the inside zipper, pulling out her engagement ring. She handed it to him.
“I release you, Steve. You need to find somebody who wants those same dreams with you. I don’t ever want to go back there. I don’t ever want to be a police officer again, and I don’t want to start at a security company. I’m happy right here on this little island running this lighthouse.”
He stared at the ring for a long moment before finally taking it from her hand. “You can’t run forever, Em. How can you be happy living such a small life like this?”
She smiled slightly. “Just because it’s a small life doesn’t mean it’s not a fulfilling one. People here are just different. I can be myself, my real self, the one that I’ve been hiding my whole life. I can be a part of a community, and I don’t have to be scared. I don’t have to be on the defensive. I can just relax and do what I love. I can follow whatever dreams I have right here. I already have friends.”
“So, that’s it? You’re just cutting ties with me and Caroline and the whole community you had back home?”
She swallowed hard. “Caroline will always be my best friend, and I will never cut ties with her. But everything else, I have to let go of. It’s like I was a different person before the shooting, and now I’m this person. You wouldn’t want to be engaged to her anyway, Steve. She’s a stranger to you.”
He shook his head. “I think you’re making a big mistake. You built a career, and you were going to have a wonderful retirement. I just don’t understand any of this.”
She walked over to the front door and opened it. “That’s the beauty of this freedom I have. Nobody has to understand. I get to choose the life I want, and I’ve made my choice. I’m sorry, Steve. I never wanted to break your heart. But this is how it has to be for me, and I’m at peace with it. I hope you have a really happy life and you find someone who will love you the way you deserve.”
He slowly walked past her and back out onto the porch.
“I wish you all the best, Emma. I know you’re broken from what happened, and I truly hope one day you’ll get some help for that because you deserve to feel at peace about that too. Goodbye.”
As she watched him walk down and get into his rental car, she felt lighter. This was something that should’ve happened months ago, but she didn’t know if she was ready to let go of the relationship when everything else in her life was falling apart. She watched the car disappear down the long gravel street, and she knew that she was finally starting her life over again.
Chapter 8
Julie loved having someone stay at the inn. Her whole life, she had enjoyed meeting new people and finding out about their lives. For a long time, she had even considered being a newspaper reporter or a television journalist so that she could go out into the world and ask people questions without them thinking that she was just nosy.
When Anna had agreed to come stay at the inn while she was in Seagrove on business, it made Julie happy to have someone else to talk to. She was enjoying her new friendship with Emma, and she always enjoyed her time with Dawson and Dylan. But the constant in and out of guests was one of her favorite things about living there.
“I hope you enjoyed dinner,” Julie said as she sat across from the kitchen table with Anna.
“It was wonderful. I can’t remember when I’ve enjoyed chicken and dumplings so much. Lucy is definitely genius in the kitchen.”
Julie nodded. “Yes, she definitely is. So, how long did you say you’ll be in Seagrove?”
Anna took a sip of her coffee. “Probably until Monday. I’ve got some other things coming up that I have to attend to, so I don’t think I can stay much past that. I hope it’s okay for
