As if realising she was now intruding, the woman gave a small wave to Agatha and said, ‘Morning, love,’ before turning, checking the street for traffic and heading back to her house.
Agatha approached Nell cautiously. Nell was still leaning against the car, her arms folded, her sunglasses covering her eyes.
‘What did she want?’ asked Agatha.
‘You’re a smart kid. I think you know.’
Agatha nodded. She did. The neighbours never came over to say hello, only to complain or mow the front lawns.
Once inside the car, Nell suggested going to the shopping mall and getting some breakfast. The further they drove away from the house; Agatha could feel herself relax. By the time they arrived at Greensward Shopping Plaza Agatha was hungry for breakfast.
They found a small slightly rundown café and quickly ordered. It was well after nine and the plaza was buzzing with mums that had done the school drop off, retirees getting their supermarket shopping done before the heat of the day, and a few teenagers who should have been in school but decided that hanging out at the plaza was a better option.
Agatha’s chocolate shake arrived along with the toasted cheese sandwich with a side of bacon. Nell sipped on a tall coffee and looked at Agatha.
‘So? Tell me? How are you?’
‘I don’t know what you want me to say,’ Agatha said, with half a mouthful of toast. ‘Do you want me to tell you how I really am, knowing you can’t change anything, or do you want me to say I’m fine, so you feel better?’
Nell sat back in her chair and looked at Agatha. ‘Fair enough. I should stop asking that question.’
‘Yep, you should.’
Leaning in, Nell said, ‘I want to talk to you about something.’
Agatha put down her toast, picked up the glass with half of the shake still waiting, and sat back in her chair. ‘Let me guess.’ Her face lit up.
‘Okay,’ said Nell, smiling back, seemingly pleased that Agatha was brightening up.
‘Whenever you want to talk to me about something it usually ends up being about one of three things: court, doctors, school.’
‘Am I that predictable?’ Nell laughed.
‘The courts have just sent me back, so cross them off the list. I had a mandatory check-up at the doctors not long before my return, so strike that. Which means this breakfast conversation is about . . . wait for it . . . drumroll . . . school. I can make this a quick conversation, Nell. No. Not going.’
‘I know . . . ’
‘Don’t say that,’ Agatha cut in abruptly. ‘Don’t say you know.’ Her fleeting cheery disposition had changed. She put down the glass, picked up the toast then dropped it down. ‘I’m tired of hearing people say they know. You don’t know Nell. None of you know.’
‘Then tell me.’ Nell was looking at her, leaning closer, as if to find privacy in this very public place.
‘I can’t go to school. Not yet.’
‘You didn’t finish primary school and you’ve missed the first year of high school. The longer you wait . . . ’
‘I know . . . the harder it will be. You see where I live, how we live. That’s hard.’
‘I just think school will be good for you, make friends, learn new stuff.’
‘Friends I can’t have over, and I will never get to go to their place, just like primary school. They all know too much, and if they don’t someone will tell them. The same kids who teased me before will still be there. No thanks.’
Agatha picked up the last piece of cheese toast and took a bite. ‘You know what, Nell, sometimes, going to other places, like Katherine’s, it makes it harder to come back home.’
Nell nodded, ‘I don’t know what to say, Agatha, I really don’t.’
Agatha picked up the paper napkin that had been placed down and brushed away the crumbs that had fallen on it. Placing it back on the table, she smoothed out the creased she had made.
Nell watched every movement. ‘Come on,’ she said. ‘Let’s go for a wander through the shops. If you’re not going to school, we can at least do some window shopping.’
Pushing her coffee cup to the centre of the table, Nell stood up and picked up her handbag from the back of the chair. Agatha turned her plate around in a complete circle then lined up the cutlery and carefully placed her glass in the centre. She started to step away, but her hand reached out and readjusted the straw in the glass and gave the table one last light brush, then wiped her hands together, checking each individual finger.
The pair walked along in silence, looking at the different window displays, occasionally pointing out things to each other. An hour later, Nell dropped Agatha back at her house.
‘I’ll see you tomorrow,’ she said to Agatha, who was already out of the car.
‘Sure.’
Agatha watched as Nell drove to the end of the street and turned the corner. She looked up and down the near empty street and felt the warmth of the sun on her shoulders.
‘School, yeah right,’ she said aloud. She walked up the path and in through the front door, shutting it firmly behind her.
5
It was immediately obvious to Agatha, when she entered her bedroom, that her suitcase was gone. Before she even bent down to look, she knew.
Her pillow had been moved; the door of her wardrobe wasn’t fully closed like she had carefully left it. She sunk to her knees and saw the empty space under her bed. Panic rose from the pit of her stomach to her throat. She stood up and swirled around. The tubs were the same. She flew to the wardrobe and opened the door and the drawer so
