What the fuck am I doing? Aaron wondered as he took the highway out into the country. He’d had very little time in the last week to form a strategy for tonight or even think much about it.
His phone barked as if in reply. If the seals were trying to give him an answer, Aaron couldn’t interpret it.
“Thanks, guys,” he said aloud. “Real helpful.”
Arf!
His phone was such a menace.
When he parked at the farm, he quickly surveyed the other cars, but he didn’t know what Zack was renting these days and thus had no idea if he’d arrived yet or not. Finally, Aaron snatched his phone off the backseat once he had parked at the farm. One of the very many texts from Ari was:
Ari: I know something happened.
“I’m an elite athlete. Something’s always happening, Ari,” Aaron muttered as he stalked up the walk to the front porch. His life was plenty weird enough without his sister making it weirder.
He let himself in, the squeak and slam of the screen door announcing his arrival. It sounded like summer even if it was December and seven degrees out. He kicked his shoes off, tossed his coat on top of the others already piled on the stair railing, and joined the group gathered in the living room.
There was a small crowd of people already gathered. Sam, Morgan and Charlotte were deep in conversation with Shane, who coached jumps, and Haruka, who taught dance and artistry. A flurry of French drifted from a corner where Fitz, Gabe, and Huy were together talking about something too quickly for Aaron to be able to decipher it.
And there was Zack, sitting on the couch next to Angel, chatting with him and looking as if he’d always belonged in the group. Aaron took a moment to imagine a life where that was really the case, as if they could always be part of the same universe together. The idea took his breath away.
Zack, as if feeling Aaron’s eyes on him, looked up. He wore a fleece jacket, zipped all the way up despite the wood-burning stove next to him throwing out its cheery warmth. Aaron wanted to throw himself into his arms.
Before he could tell himself to think better of it, he did just that, bouncing across the room and hugged Zack—or tried to, at least. Zack was still sitting down, which meant that Aaron landed on his lap with his arms around his neck and his face, for a brief moment, in the fleece-covered warmth of his shoulder.
Zack chuckled, and Aaron could feel it reverberated between their bodies. His arms tightened around Aaron’s back; Aaron had, somehow, forgotten how strong he was—and how secure he felt in his embrace.
“Hello, Aaron.”
“Hi.”
From behind him came a cough, he wasn’t sure from who. Zack dropped his arms, Aaron peeled himself away and stood up again, feeling sheepish.
“Er. Hi everybody.” Gossipy as skaters were, not everyone here was from TCI or knew his history with Zack. He’d just given everyone a lot to talk about. Which he didn’t mind for his own sake, but was a lot to put on Zack, who he’d barely spoken to in months.
“Excellent boundaries, Sheftall,” Katie said, walking into the room.
“Sorry,” Aaron muttered. I really should have thought this through.
Zack touched his fingertips to Aaron’s wrist. “It’s fine,” he said softly, in a manner that was far more for Aaron’s ears than theirs.
Aaron wished he had worn long sleeves; they would have hidden the goosebumps that broke out up and down his arms.
At that moment, Brendan appeared in the doorway to announce that dinner was ready.
BE CHILL, Aaron told himself as he made his way to the dining room. Be chill. Be way more chill than that. He hadn’t talked to Zack face-to-face in months. He’d invited him to dinner at Katie and Brendan’s because he’d been having feelings about Zack, seals, and winning, not necessarily in that order. At some point he really wanted to have a conversation with him, about all of that, but really about anything at all. And for that to happen he should probably not break his streak of, somehow, managing to not freak Zack out.
He could totally manage a meal sitting next to Zack. He could chat with Katie about the cows, practice his Japanese with Haruka, and wish his French were better so he could eavesdrop more effectively on Fitz and Huy. Ugh. Canadians. He just didn’t know what to do about Zack. He’d gotten himself into this situation by winging it, but he probably shouldn’t try to get himself out the same way. So he relied, perhaps too much, on gracious small talk and other people occupying Zack’s attention.
As Aaron was helping to clear the table, his phone barked in his back pocket. Yet again. Loudly, and repeatedly. He set the dishes he was carrying on the counter next to where Brendan was rinsing things at the sink and frowned as he dug out his phone.
Ari was calling him. Again.
“Not now,” he complained aloud.
Katie set down another stack of plates next to him. “What is it?” she asked.
“My sister,” Aaron said. He went back to the table for more dishes. Katie went with him.
“Is something wrong?” she asked.
Aaron sighed as he gathered up dirty silverware. Everything else going on in his head tonight, he didn’t have the bandwidth for Ari. “She thinks there is.”
Katie grabbed a dishcloth and began wiping crumbs off the table. “With reason?”
If there was, I’d know how to talk to her about it. “Maybe. I don’t know. She’s been wanting to chat about some stuff since I was in St. Petersburg, and I haven’t wanted to deal.”
“You’ve also been busy,” Katie pointed out.
“Yeah.”
“But right now,” Katie continued, a glint that some might call mischievous in her eye. “You have the evening off and nothing on your schedule before noon tomorrow. Go call your sister back, okay?”
“Ugh.” It was possibly the last thing Aaron wanted to do. Among other
