How dare he.
Somehow he got to the doorway of the room Katie was in. He grabbed the frame and said her name as softly as possible; he didn’t want to draw attention to himself, and he didn’t want her to yell, but mostly, he didn’t want to let go of the door frame in case he fell down.
Katie looked up from her laptop, and Aaron watched as the thing where they were alike kicked in. He didn’t have to say anything, but her forehead creased in concern.
“What’s wrong?” she asked, just as quietly
With one hand still on the doorframe, he texted her the link to the article, and nodded at her phone when it dinged.
Aaron watched her face carefully while she scrolled through the piece. She was too studied in the need for neutrality, though, to betray any reaction.
“I see,” she finally said when she finished.
Aaron, finally reasonably sure his knees would hold him, let go of the doorframe, crossed the room, and dropped down on the floor next to her.
“I forgot that was coming out,” he admitted.
“I hadn’t. It’s good timing,” Katie said, her face and voice still neutral. Aaron felt his anger extend to her, too.
“What do you mean it’s good timing?” he protested. “I’m in the middle of Nationals! And he doesn’t even talk about anyone else in the field!”
“That’s wildly to your advantage.”
“He wrote about the island!!” The sense of betrayal nearly choked him.
“He’s allowed,” Katie said. Her tone was quiet, but the words were relentless. “You invited him there.”
“Not for that.” Aaron stared at her. “I can’t believe you’re taking his side”
“I’m not taking anybody’s side,” Katie said firmly, even sternly. “He came here to do a job. He did it. I asked you to make sure it got done a certain way, and it did. And yes there were bonus complications, but you’ve seemed to mostly enjoy those. He’s a good enough guy. Everyone’s done quite well, as far as I’m concerned.”
Aaron couldn’t be that dispassionate. “He broke up with me because he was worried about journalistic ethics!” he exclaimed. “Doesn’t that make this sketchy?” He waved his phone around. “I’m not just having emotions because I’m me and I’m cagey about the shit I’m cagey about!”
“I get that, Aaron. I really do. But this article only does you well. And your personal feelings about it can wait until you’re on the side of a cereal box. Okay?”
“Everyone’s going to be talking about it!” Aaron protested
“That’s the goal.” Katie wrapped an arm around his shoulders and gave him a sideways hug. He slumped his head down on her shoulder. “Also, Cayden just finished.”
Aaron sat bolt upright again. Cayden had drawn the last slot for the day. “How’d he do?”
“You’re in third.”
Aaron took a deep breath. That meant Cayden was ahead of him for now. Which wasn’t great, but also wasn’t fatal. “Okay. I can work with that. After I yell at Zack, of course. And go to the press conference, I guess.”
He was trying to be funny and trying to remind himself that he was absolutely within striking distance of what he wanted. But he was too angry. He felt exposed, in the worst sort of way. He’d trusted Zack, and Zack had laid out all his deepest secrets for everyone to see. He was also in the middle of Nationals and had exactly no time to deal with this.
Right now he had to get through the press conference. Aaron had never loved these things and now he was furious and trapped, a selkie without its skin and under someone else’s control. But he knew how to do these things, and was safe from questions about Zack’s article. No journalist was going to ask about someone else’s journalism.
As the day went on he was sure he could track the spread of the article, as people’s eyes and not-so-subtle whispers followed him. He tried to keep to himself as best he could, but that wasn’t much. After the press conference and the testing, he had a team meeting with Brendan and Katie and the rest of the TCI crew, and then they all went out to dinner. At least these were the people who knew him and could insulate him from the whispers and stares of others. In other circumstances, Aaron would have had Zack come along. But he was sure he couldn’t see Zack without screaming right now, and that didn’t need to happen in front of everyone else.
At least at dinner the other skaters were more focused on some drama that had happened that afternoon in the free dance than anything involving himself. He wasn’t interested in it, but he was grateful for it.
After that, he had every intention of crashing early. Instead he lay in bed and stared at the ceiling for hours, trapped in the narrative of his life—from everything the article shouldn’t have covered but did to everything no one could understand but he desperately wished they would.
THE NEXT MORNING AT breakfast, while Aaron picked at scrambled eggs from the hotel buffet, Katie and Brendan finally came to intervene. They slid into seats at the table where he was sitting by himself, each carrying their own breakfast.
“How are you doing?” Katie asked, while Brendan gave Aaron his best concerned-coach look.
“Trying to be chill. But really, really pissed. And I didn’t sleep well,” he admitted.
Aaron didn’t miss the look of concern that Katie and Brendan gave each other. Knowing his coaches were worried about him didn’t exactly help his equanimity. He was on-edge enough as it was.
“This is a thing you need to deal with,” Katie said simply.
Aaron wanted to snap at her that he knew that, but before he could, she kept talking.
“And it’s a thing you will deal with, with Zack, after this competition is over,” she said. “You two will sort it out, one way or another, but for now, you need to put all your feelings about him and that article in
