“I need to leave.” Her voice is soft.
Stepping back, I nod and grab my bag. “I’ll come by when you’re home.” When I lean in to kiss her cheek, she freezes. It takes everything in me not to wrap her in my arms and hold her, keep her safe and calm. As much as I want to, I also don’t want to make her uncomfortable.
But if there’s one thing I’m certain about, it’s that this baby is mine, and so is she… I just need to make her see that.
chapter 14
Camden
After a much-needed shower, I grab my handy dictionary, despite how much Allyson laughed at it, and head out of my hotel. My room is spacious enough for me, and the entire hotel has a modern feel that caught me by surprise since the exterior seems as if it’s from another century, and if I knew anything about art history or architecture, I could probably name the time period. Regardless, it was a contrast to the interior and a nice surprise.
I walk around the city with no real direction. I didn’t exactly come here with the idea of being a tourist, but I can’t stay stuck in that hotel until Allyson finishes work. So many things have been crossing through my mind these last few days. The first one is how we’re going to co-parent when we live in different countries.
I wasn’t joking when I told Allyson I wanted more than one night, and now it seems as if in some capacity, we’ll have a lifetime. As much as the idea of something like this would have made me run in the opposite direction in the past, this situation isn’t as scary as I thought. One look at Allyson and I want to protect her. This isn’t about me; it’s about something greater. Something I never put much thought into.
I’m out of my element and traveling into unknown territory. Bachelorhood? I’ve got that down pat. Relationships? Not so much. Parenthood? I don’t have a fucking clue. But hell, I’ve never been afraid of a challenge, and there’s no time like the present to grab the bull by the horns and ride it out.
I look up at the buildings I walk by, cars and buses buzzing by as locals move around me in a hurry. I chuckle to myself when I walk by a Dunkin’ Donuts and continue going until I come across a terrace full of people.
I take a seat and order a beer. While I wait for my drink, I open the dictionary and look up random words in an attempt to give myself a crash-course in Spanish, which I know is a flawed plan. I thank the waiter when he brings my beer and pay him on the spot.
With a refreshing sip of my beer, I lean back in my chair, watching people walk by. My mind wanders to Allyson and what her life is like here. I only get a glimpse based on what she posts on social media, but I can’t help but imagine her living the day-to-day here. Grocery shopping, lounging in her apartment, taking the subway.
I wouldn’t ask her to leave her job to move back to the US because we’re having a baby together. We’re going to need a plan. One where I’ll visit every chance I get since I can work from anywhere, and maybe have Allyson fly home during the holidays. So many scenarios run through my mind—missing milestones, the child not recognizing me, not being present if something happens, not reading him or her bedtime stories.
I’ve been turned inside out with this news, and all I can think about lately is being a father, of things I’d want to do with the kid, ways to protect him or her, what I’d want to teach as the baby grows. I never thought about things like this before. Now, I can’t get it out of my mind. It’s non-stop.
When I finish my beer, I stand and continue walking, getting a feel for the city, and stopping at any place that calls my attention. When I’m tired of walking, I head back to my hotel room and do some work in hopes that the last hour before Allyson gets out of work goes by faster than these last two hours have.
- - - - -
I take the elevator up to Allyson’s apartment after she confirmed she was home. My heart is racing, although I’m usually calm and confident. This is different, and I know we’re going to have to tell Easton soon. He’s going to kick my ass, but I’ll be lucky if he stops at that instead of completely writing me off.
Inhaling deeply, I run a hand through my damp hair and knock on the door.
“Hey,” Allyson opens right away.
“Hey.” I smile as I walk in, closing the door behind her.
When I told her the hotel recommended a restaurant for dinner, she got super excited, telling me she loves the place. A ton of exclamations marks followed her response. But right now, seeing her in tight jeans and a low-cut shirt, all I want to do is walk her back to her room and test the rumor about pregnancy making women crave more sex.
“You’re going to love La Finca. They’ve got fresh food, all locally grown and raised.” Allyson is talking, but I’ve been staring at her instead of paying attention.
“Camden?” She lifts her eyebrows. “Are you ready?”
That’s when I notice she has her purse flung over her shoulder and keys in her hand.
“Oh, yeah, sorry.” I open the door and lead her out of her apartment, waiting while she locks up.
“How was your afternoon?” I ask, focusing on our conversation.
“Good,” Ally smiles. The worried woman I came face-to-face with earlier is gone, and the woman I’ve always known is back. God, she’s gorgeous. “How about you? Did you look around the city?”
“I walked a bit, had a beer on a
