I finally pulled my hand away to grab my chair, tug it closer, sat down, and plopped my hand back into his. I had to touch him. It’d felt so amazing the first time. “Of course I’ve grown up. I’m twenty-six, Nathan. I’m not the annoying kid playing with Sabrina and following you and your brothers around anymore. If you can’t see that, I might as well leave now.”
Nathan’s eyes darted up to mine and stared intently at me. “I don’t want you to leave.”
I believed him. Biting my lip, I watched his fingers resume their gentle petting on my palm. “I don’t want to leave.”
“Okay.”
“Okay,” I repeated softly, darting a look his way. The tenderness and need in his gaze had me catching my breath. I never thought I’d see that look directed at me, and I didn’t know if I was strong enough to live up to the promise I saw lurking in his naughty gaze.
All my answers to the dating app came swimming back at me. I’d had more than my share of alcohol to get through the questionnaire. I had wanted to sound flirty and vaguely more experienced than I actually was.
I could tell by the glint in Nathan’s eyes that he had a world of experience himself.
I was so outta my depth.
“So, what’s next? I’m kinda rusty at this.” I stammered. “I guess I need to know if this is a hookup or something more? I need to manage my expectations.”
Nathan wordlessly shook his head. I could all but see the gears turning behind his eyes. Everyone thought Austin was the brains behind Badass Builds, but I knew better. Nathan had a lot of brains hiding behind all those muscles.
It was half the reason I’d been in love with him for so long. That and the way he loved his family. And those muscles. All big and protective and sexy.
Shoot, what were we talking about? Oh right. Hooking up. With Nathan. Was this really my life?
His voice was all rumbly when he finally spoke. “I want to do this right. Get to know the grown-up you. Go on a few dates. See where it goes then. You deserve every bit of my attention, darlin’.”
Oh, swoon. My heart literally fluttered in my chest. This time I bit my lip to hide the huge grin tugging at my lips. Nathan wanted to date me. Not just a hookup. A date. And then see where it went from there. Commitment. Marriage. Babies!
No, that was crazy and way ahead of myself.
Instead, I nodded slowly. “Okay. I agree.”
It was so hard to keep the squeal inside of me. After a lifetime of crushing and lusting after the hottest Burns brother, he wanted to date me.
Me!
Not just hook up, but date.
My euphoria lasted all of a minute. And then me being me, all the things that could go wrong assailed me.
I hissed a pained breath. “But we can’t tell anyone though.”
“What?”
“If this—whatever this is—doesn’t work out, I don’t want it to be awkward. I want to still have Sabrina and her mom in my life. They’re like—you’re all like—my second family. I couldn’t bear it if I didn’t have them in my life anymore.” The longer I spoke, the more that affronted expression left Nathan’s face until finally he was looking at me with this softness that made me teary. I blinked quickly to mask it, but a tear still tracked down my cheek.
“I get it.” Nathan reached out and gently wiped the tear from my cheek with his thumb as he cupped my face. “We won’t tell anyone until you’re ready.”
“Thank you,” I whispered, mesmerized by the look in his eyes.
He shook his head slightly. “It’s hard to remember a time in my life without you in it. It’s crazy to me that you’re this amazing, gorgeous woman. When did it happen? How did I not notice?”
The reverent tone in his voice made my body burn. Nathan was finally seeing me, and I didn’t know what to do with myself. Or him.
He still looked at me with that stunned, soft look as he paused to take a drink from his whiskey. This might’ve all been a revelation to him, but I knew everything there was to know about Nathan Burns. Down to his usual drink order. Bushmills 21-year single malt, neat.
Meanwhile I still sat here without a drink. Something that had only just occurred to me.
And Nathan.
“Shit, I haven’t even bought you a drink. I swear I usually have more game than this.” He winced. “Not that that’s something you needed to know. Fuck, I’m flustered. What do you want to drink? I don’t think they have very good wine here; probably just a shit house blend. What’s that thing you always drink with Sabrina? A lemon something?”
Maybe he had been paying attention. I smiled slightly. “Just water, please. I had a terrible hangover this morning, and I’ve got work tomorrow.”
Like the gentleman he was, he didn’t try to pressure me into ordering something harder to loosen up. Instead, he nodded and went to the bar to order my water.
Of course, the minute he got up there, the blonde from earlier snatched the barstool next to him and immediately started talking to him. All my earlier insecurities rushed to the surface again. I’d watched Nathan enough over the years to know his type. And she could’ve been his poster girl. Literally on a poster at his workbench at the shop.
But this time, Nathan hardly paid her any attention. He gave her a distracted glance, shook his head, and walked back to me with my water in hand.
The blonde’s glare shifted from Nathan’s back to me.
Usually, I’d duck my head and hide—I hated confrontation of any kind. But Nathan had chosen me. Me. Over her.
Again.
I think I was too shocked to do anything more than blink back at her.
