"Easier said than done."
"Keep trying, lassie. That is where ye will find a bit of peace."
Storm studied the women and children around her. She sensed that Maggie spoke for all of them. Not one had an accusatory word or look for her. They quietly went about the business of preparing for war. They silently but firmly included her in their number, as just another woman doing what she could to help the men who were soon to be fighting. She wondered how many knew that she, too, held the fear of losing a loved one, that her prayers were not really for any of the English outside the walls of Caraidland, but for one tall, dark Scot standing upon its battlements, bravely facing the overwhelming odds.
Inwardly, she grimaced and tried to concentrate upon the salve she mixed. She would not be surprised to discover that every woman there knew how she felt about Tavis. Love was an emotion most women could easily recognize in another. It would not really surprise her to discover that they had seen how she felt before she had.
Briefly, she wondered what Tavis thought about the words she had spoken to him. Did he believe her? Did her confession make him happy or appall him? Was he wondering how he really felt about her or if there was a future for them?
A soft curse echoed through her mind, and she told herself not to be such an idiot. He was standing upon the walls of Caraidland looking at a gathering force that was more than twice the size of his own. He had no time to think on a few whispered words. Lives hung in the balance; perhaps the end of the MacLagans and Caraidland was drawing near. What one small woman felt or said was not something he would ponder as he faced that. Even she could understand how, at this moment in their lives, what she felt for him and he for her was insignificant.
She tried very hard not to think of him, at least not constantly. It only made her fear for him grow. Nothing could make her stop being afraid for him, stop worrying about what he faced, but she knew it was time to concentrate upon other things. Very soon there would be work that needed doing, people who needed help. She had to stop being so distracted or she could fail them, fail to carry her share of the burden.
After the battle we will talk, she told herself. The MacLagans have to win and, Papa, if ye are watching, I know ye will understand why I wish our enemies to be the victors. I swallowed my pride and told him how I feel, Papa. I could not let it stay a secret when death stares us in the face. I hope ye understand something else, Papa. I have begged God to let Tavis live, e'en if he cares not a drop for me. I need him to live e'en more than I need him to love me. But, Papa? An all goes awry and Hugh does as we all fear, if he wipes the earth clean of the clan MacLagan, please help me. Hugh will take me alive and within me is growing a new MacLagan, hope for the future of the clan and a part of the man I love. Help me keep the child alive, Papa, I beg it of you.
Her silent conversation with her father came to an abrupt halt. The sound reaching her ears told her that the men of Caraidland no longer stood silent and waiting. She grasped Maggie's hand.
"It begins."
Chapter Twenty-One
"MacLagan, do you hear me?"
Colin stared down at Sir Hugh, who had ridden forward, flying a flag that indicated he wished to talk, and flanked by two men-at-arms. "Aye. Do ye come to ask me terms o' surrender?"
Hugh spluttered with outrage. " 'Tis no time for jests, fool. Do ye yield?"
"Nay, Sassanach dog. Caraidland will never yield."
"Then it will fall. Look about. Can you deny what your eyes see? I have many men, many more than you do. Near to twice as many."
"That makes us about equal then."
"You fool," Hugh screamed. "Do you mean to condemn your whole clan for but one girl? Is your son's whore worth the loss of Caraidland, the end of your clan? Give her over to me and I will spare your people. Do not force me to spill the blood of your people for an English slut."
"The only blood that will run today is Sassanach blood."
"I will bring this keep down around your ears, you fool."
"Then cease yapping, cur, and get on with the business."
"You die today, MacLagan. You and your whole clan, the rest of that thieving scum." He hurled the truce flag down, trampling it in the dust as he rode back to his army.
"The man has nay control o'er his temper, eh?" Colin grinned at his sons, who flanked him, as Hugh rode back to his men and began to scream orders. "He doesnae have old Eldon's skill with a taunt. There was a man who kenned how to wield a word."
Sholto laughed and shook his head. "Ye talk as if ye miss the man."
"Aye, I do and will. 'Tis rare in a man's life to face a man like Roden Eldon. Ye kenned ye could trust his word. Unlike this whoreson, Eldon wouldnae slay the innocent. Eldon would give up a victory ere he would take sword to the unarmed, women and children. Ye knew where ye stood with Eldon. If he took hostages, ye could trust him to treat them weel. All ye needed to fash yourself about was the ransom and how to raise it. Aye, I will miss him. I could trust and respect that Sassanach more than I can trust some of me own kin."
"Aye, he was a
