You could call Hawk, a voice whispers in my ear.
That little devil on my shoulder screams to call him. My body begs to do it as well. But I can’t. I can’t do that to myself again. I can’t fall deeper in love with this man who will only turn his back on me.
A man who will, without hesitation, walk away when shit gets real. For the first time in my life, unfortunately for my poor pitiful heart, I want shit to be real. So real that my entire body aches with need, with want, with desire for a future.
Hawk and I will never be that real, we’ll never be anything more than two people who crave to fuck one another, physical pleasures only and as much as I love fucking him, I want a future. I don’t know if I’ll ever want children, but I at least want a companion.
“Knock, knock,” a voice calls out and my entire body jumps at least four inches from the seat of my chair.
Lifting my head, I suck in a breath as my eyes travel up Graham’s body and meet his own. He frowns for just a moment before he smirks.
“Jumpy today?” he asks.
“Yeah,” I grunt.
He doesn’t act the least bit curious as to why I am jumpy though. He starts talking to me about the upcoming employee picnic and asks if I’ll be bringing anyone.
I almost groan thinking about needing to go and be part of the team. I don’t want to be part of anything, I just want to do my job, go home, and wonder what happens next in life.
Graham breaks my inner thoughts as he proceeds to tell me about this girl he’s dating and that he’ll be bringing her along, as if I give a shit. Plus, considering he asked me out just a few days ago, it adds to the growing list of reasons I won’t ever be dating him, as if I needed more.
I don’t even attempt to speak. He rattles on about his girl, then gives me a smile and turns his back to me before walking away. I have no clue why he was even here, unless it was all a ploy to make me jealous, and if it was, it was pointless.
Shifting my gaze back to my computer, I decide to check my email one last time before I walk out on the lot and just breathe. I need some fresh air. I need some silence and there is nothing quiet about this office or the people who continue to pop in every five minutes.
There’s nobody around the lot, which doesn’t surprise me. It’s two in the afternoon, this is our dead time. Later this afternoon and early evening we may get a few bites, then it will pick up after people start getting off of work.
I just need to be alone. I’m not looking for a sale or commission right now. I just need to breathe. I feel safe enough to be alone out in the lot, so I continue to walk through the rows of cars.
Tugging down the tailgate of a pickup, I jump up onto the bed and close my eye as I allow the warm sun to shine down on me. The spring is starting to turn to summer and I can’t wait.
Summer is my absolute favorite season. I don’t spend a lot of time on a tan or anything like that, I just enjoy walking on the warm sand barefoot and I used to love sitting on my balcony and enjoying my tea in the mornings.
“You shouldn’t be alone out here,” a deep voice rumbles from behind me.
My spine straightens and my eyelids pop open. I don’t make a single move to look behind me. Whoever he is, I don’t recognize his voice immediately. He could be the senator, but he could be half a dozen other men too.
“I’ve been watching you, Avah. I miss you,” he practically purrs.
Pressing my lips together, I hold my breath wishing that he would just disappear. I want him to go far, far, away. I don’t even care who he is, I just want him gone.
“Did you enjoy your roses? No, wait, don’t answer that,” he coos.
I wasn’t planning on it, not in the slightest.
Biting the inside of my cheek, I silently pray for someone to come around the corner, even Graham would be a welcome sight right about now. But nobody comes. Not a single fucking soul.
The stranger’s finger touches the side of my neck and I bite the inside of my lip even harder, the metallic taste of blood filling my mouth in an attempt to keep from giving him any kind of physical reaction, even though all I want to do is throw up and shiver in disgust.
“I want to hear your answer when you’re naked, chained, and spread for me.”
I don’t give him the satisfaction of a response. Instead. I bite my cheek harder, knowing that it’s going to take days, if not weeks, to heal. It doesn’t matter, nothing does, not right now. Maybe when this is over, when whatever happens does, when I’m free from this creep, I might care if I hurt myself, but not right now and not anytime soon.
“I’ll see you soon, gorgeous. Sleep tight and think of me. When the time is right, you’ll be all mine.”
His finger disappears from my skin and I turn around after counting to five only to see that there is nobody there. Wherever he came from, he slipped away just as quietly and quickly. I don’t move from my spot.
Wrenching my phone out of my pocket, I think about calling the police, but know that it would be fruitless, since I didn’t even see him. His voice wasn’t distinct, but then again, I think that he was purposely making it that way, so that I couldn’t pick him out specifically.
Pulling up my contact list, I start to scroll down to find Hawk’s number. It stares back
