“You’re not secretly hoping that if Sage wins tonight, he’ll want you back, are you?” Miriah asks while typing a response to Sage on my phone.
“What? Of course not!” Okay, so that didn’t sound believable even to me. “I’m with Tal now and have been for…how long has it been? Eight years? Holy shit. We’ve been hooking up for eight years!”
“That’s a long time to hook up with someone and not get a ring,” Miriah mutters.
“No, Tal may not want something…permanent with me. I don’t want to marry him either, but I would never toss him aside if Sage wanted me back, which he doesn’t.”
“Unless he wins tonight…”
“That’s not going to happen,” I assure her. “I mean, yes, I think he’ll win. He has to or he’ll be devastated. I’m just saying even if Sage wins everything he’s been working toward the past fifteen years, he’s over me. And I’m over him.”
“Sure, you are. I bet you never think of him for even a second when you’re under his identical twin brother.”
“Does everyone think I’m still pining for Sage?” I ask, meaning everyone in our extended family of cage fighters from Havoc.
“Uh-huh.”
“That’s ridiculous!” I exclaim.
“What’s ridiculous is that Tal puts up with it, playing runner-up to his brother, yet again. No wonder he’s never sober. It must be hard trying to live up to someone who looks just like you.”
“That’s not why he…never mind,” I say, biting my tongue before I say too much and give away a secret that’s not mine to tell.
I put on the right turn signal and ease into the long line of cars waiting to get into the event center for the biggest fight of the year. Hell, maybe even the biggest one in twenty-six years. Everyone has been waiting for this night, for Linc’s son to step into the cage and win the same belt his dad won so long ago.
And Sage has given up everything in his life except for the training to get it, including me.
Chapter Two
Sage Abrams
“I’m going to kill him,” I grumble while slamming my fist into the big, red pads my dad is holding up in front of him. “I’m going to kick Tal’s tattooed ass up and down the streets!”
“He’ll be here,” Dad assures me, even though his clenched jaw says he’s not so sure. Talon is a loose cannon. Always has been. The two of us spent every second of our childhood together and even live together now, but lately he’s acted like a stranger. I don’t know what the hell is going on inside his fucked-up head, and I can’t help but somehow feel responsible.
I’ve always been the overachiever in school and in the cage. That doesn’t mean I’m perfect. It just means that I have more drive and determination to succeed than my brother does. In fact, sometimes I look around and see all the sacrifices I’ve made in the name of being the best welterweight fighter in the world, and I’m not sure if it’s all worth it.
Hopefully tonight, after I knock out Cyrus Cutler and finally have my belt, the pride and accomplishment will be worth the compromises.
First and foremost afterward, I have to get laid.
As part of most fighters’ training, they abstain a week to a few days before a big fight. Me, the overachiever that I am, I’ve been celibate for years now.
Years!
At least three of them, maybe more.
It’s been nearly impossible to keep my hands to myself and off of myself, especially since Eden is always in our house, walking around in nothing but one of Tal’s t-shirts. It’s like the cage fighter gods are trying to test me every second of the day. She’s so beautiful it hurts.
No, really, it physically hurts to see the girl I used to love with my brother and hear her moans coming from his bed.
Years ago, when Tal gave up training, the two of them spent more time together than Eden and I ever did. And so, when he asked me if I cared if he made a move, I gave him my permission, telling myself that Eden deserved to be happy, to have a boyfriend who would take her to dinner or curl up and watch a movie with her at night.
I never have time for those kinds of things between lifting, cardio, sparring and grappling training. Besides, my diet is too strict to maintain weight to even try and eat out.
Not to mention the weeks or even months I would go without touching her to try and keep my edge, unable to even get her off with my fingers or tongue because I knew I wouldn’t be able to stop myself from being with her if I touched her.
I was a complete dick to Eden, and I doubt if she’ll ever forgive me.
In fact, her being with Tal in the house we share since they graduated from college four years ago seems like her form of cruel and unusual torture, to rub my nose in everything I had and let go to chase my dream.
“Calm your tits, Mom. I was a few minutes late. So what? It’s not like I’m the one fighting tonight.”
The sound of my brother’s voice, a deeper slurred version of my own echoes around the empty training room.
“Watch your mouth when you speak to your mother, Tal!” my dad narrows his eyes over my shoulder to warn him.
“Finally!” I exclaim as I spin around to face him. Marching up to him, I give his chest a shove. “Where the fuck have you been?”
“Sorry, bro. I overslept,” he replies.
“It’s nine o’clock at night!” I exclaim.
“I took a late nap,” Tal says with a smirk. With one sniff, I can smell the stench of booze and weed on him.
“You’re baked,” I tell him.
“It was an occasion for a celebration!” he shouts.
“There’s nothing
