‘Oh God!’ Arthur covered his face momentarily with his hands. ‘I need to see her,’ he insisted again.
‘Of course. I’m sure seeing you will give her a bit of a boost. Try not to worry.’
He followed her quietly into the bedroom. Norah was lying on the bed, her modesty protected by a white, cotton sheet. Her eyes were closed and her face had a sickly sheen. He crossed to her bedside and gently took her hand.
‘Norah,’ he whispered. She opened her eyes and Arthur could see the pain she was suffering.
‘Arthur.’ She breathed his name and squeezed her eyes shut as another contraction shuddered through her. After agony-filled seconds stretched into minutes and he stood by watching helplessly, she spoke again. ‘I’m glad you’re here,’ she said at last. ‘I need to speak to you … alone.’ She looked pointedly at the other occupants in the room.
‘Of course,’ Cissy said at once. ‘I’ll go and put the kettle on. I think we could all use a cuppa. Come on Doctor.’
As they were leaving, Arthur picked up the sponge which lay beside her on the pillow and tenderly wiped her brow. ‘My darling girl …’ he whispered.
‘No, listen to me. Arthur, you need to listen.’ She raised her head slightly, her voice low and urgent, and her fingers gripped his with sudden ferocity. ‘I want you to make me a promise.’
‘Of course. Anything. You know I would promise you anything you asked, if it was in my power to give it.’
‘Good.’ Her head slumped back on to the pillow and she was silent for a few moments, mentally composing the words she was to say next. She sighed heavily and began speaking, slowly, deliberately, willing him to understand. ‘I want you to speak to Dr Darkins. I want you to tell him that, should it come down to a choice between me and the baby, you want him to save the child.’
‘But …’
‘No.’ She reached up and placed her finger on his lips. ‘Let me finish. When Jimmy … after he ...’ She could not bring herself to say the words and tears filled her eyes. ‘After what happened, I made a vow, a vow to protect my children and my children’s children. I promised to give my own life if necessary for the sake of their future. Iris has to live and if that means I have to die, so be it.’
Arthur listened with growing horror. ‘Don’t ask me to make that choice,’ he pleaded, his own eyes welling with grief. ‘You are everything to me. I can’t live without you.’
She gritted her teeth as wave upon wave of pain seared through her body. ‘You have to promise, Arthur. I’ve already spoken to Dr Darkins and he refused. In the end, I asked him to speak to you, to act upon your wishes and he did agree to that. I mean it, Arthur. I would never be able to forgive myself, or you, if Iris died whilst I lived.’
She took another deep breath and bravely tried to smile. ‘Hark at me, all doom and gloom! Chances are we’ll all get through this. I just want you to know what I want, you know, in case …’
They sat in silence for several minutes. Arthur continued to bathe her face, wiping away the beads of sweat and easing back the tendrils of red gold hair clinging damply to her head. He could not bring himself to speak. What could he say to her? If he did as she asked, these may very well be the last moments he would spend with her. He choked back the sobs building in his throat. How could he bear to lose her …? But how could he bear to deny her request? He cast his mind back to the first moment he had seen her, grinning cheekily at him as she quizzed him about his background shortly after he had arrived at Willow Farm. She had charmed him then and the affection he'd felt for her had slowly deepened into love, an overwhelming desire to hold and keep her close forever.
There was a knock at the door. ‘Arthur, we really need to come back in.’ Dr Darkins’ imperious tone brooked no resistance.
‘Just a moment.’ Arthur leaned over Norah and clasped her desperately against his chest. ‘I love you,’ he whispered in her ear. ‘I have always loved you and I always will, no matter what.’ Tears rolled unheeded down his cheeks. ‘I will do as you ask, even though it will tear out my heart to do so.’
They clung together. ‘Thank you.’ Norah whispered against his shoulder. ‘I love you. I always will. And I will always be there for you and my daughter, remember that. Even in death, I promise I will not leave you.’
‘Arthur …’ Dr Darkins knocked again.
‘You can come in.’ Gently, Arthur let her body rest back on the sheet and stood up. ‘I’ll be just outside if you need me.’
He stumbled out of the room, closed the door and wept.
◆◆◆
The nightmare went on and on. Norah could hear anxious voices discussing the fact that her contractions were becoming weaker while she drifted in and out of consciousness. At one point she was floating mid-air, watching her own body writhing on the bed, listening to the doctor exhorting her to push. Up here she was free from pain, blissfully light and unencumbered, like a butterfly who has just struggled out of the confines of its cocoon. It was so tempting to leave it all behind.
She could not do it; she could not willingly leave her husband and child. Her body was once again wracked by a contraction and summoning all of what was left of her strength, she seized upon it, using it to push once again.
‘Good, Norah. That’s it. Good girl.’ She could hear Cissy’s voice, still calm and encouraging and
