I drained the rest of my beer and rubbed my temples. “Be glad you’re not in film. It’ll eat your life.”
“Then why do you do it?”
“I’m beginning to wonder that myself,” I admitted. “I mean, I got into it because it’s really exciting, creating a world from the ground up. Working with a team, everyone in on the same secret…It’s fun, when you’re working with the right people. And you know about my dad. I guess I always wanted to follow in his footsteps. But enough about me,” I said, realizing I was running my mouth like I had on my deck the other night. “You have a dad?”
He laughed. “Yeah.”
“Tell me about him.”
“He’s a fisherman. Taught me everything I know about boats. He’s got white hair, a white beard, and a belly. The kids call him Santa.”
I laughed. “Any of those kids yours?”
“No. I’m the last man standing.”
“You don’t want kids?”
“We’ll see. I couldn’t be birthing them myself.”
But JeanieBabie24 would be happy to oblige, I thought.
“What about you?”
I shook my head. “I’m one of those career girls you hear about, shirking their reproductive duties to play ball with the boys.”
That line usually elicited some sort of objection, but it didn’t seem to bother him. “I see.”
“It’s hard enough trying to hold my own and take care of myself.” I sighed, remembering my hazy evening with Cole. At least I hadn’t slept with him, thank God. “I’m a mess.”
His smile was enigmatic. “If you say so.”
Out over the ocean, the sun melted into the horizon like a pat of butter on a hot pancake.
“Sorry for talking your ear off. Again.” The beer had clearly loosened my tongue. Perhaps I should return to sobriety for the remainder of the shoot.
But once more, he didn’t seem bothered. “Anytime.” His gaze was steady. “No apologizing.”
I nodded. “Right. Sorry.”
June 22, 2019
Stella
I wasn’t sure how long I’d been asleep on the bow when Felicity roused me, but it was dark, the boat had docked, and all the others had disembarked. I was disoriented and annoyed that she’d let me sleep in front of everyone like that. Had I snored? Was my mouth gaping open? God, how unflattering! It was humiliating.
The half-moon was low over the water, and the wind had picked up as we trudged through the powdery sand toward our bungalow. “No one thought anything of it,” Felicity assured me. “You were tired. You’ve had a long week. We all have.”
“But no one else fell asleep. What if I’m in one of Madison’s stupid videos, snoring?”
I could sense her rolling her eyes in the dark. “People sleep, Stell. And you weren’t snoring.”
We walked along the shore past the rock outcropping that separated the tranquil bay from deeper waters, waves warm as bathwater lapping at our ankles. Clouds had gathered over the island, but the stars out over the ocean shone like diamonds flung across the sky. It was unfortunate that I could hardly appreciate the peaceful setting for the tension headache gnawing at my brain. “My head hurts,” I complained. “Is it time for a pill yet?”
Felicity checked her watch. “You have an hour on the A-pill, two on the D-pill.”
Ugh. The anxiety and depression pills were the best. “What about a P-pill?”
“Are you in pain?”
“I just told you my head hurts,” I reminded her, annoyed.
“If you need it,” she said. “But you know you can’t mix it with any of the others.”
I swore she wasn’t this annoying back in LA. “Damn pill Nazi,” I complained, kicking a shell into the sea. My tummy rumbled. “What time is it? I’m starving.”
“It’s past eight,” she said as I followed her up the wooden stairs to the pier that led over the water to our bungalow. “Everyone ate on the boat.”
I sighed, exasperated. “Great, so I missed dinner too.”
“I’m sorry.” She stopped to rummage in her bag in the soft glow of one of the tiki torches that lined the pier, finally extracting our room key. “I know you’ve been having trouble sleeping at night. I thought you could use the rest.”
“No, you thought you could use some time off to flirt with Jackson.” Her mouth opened, as if in surprise. But her stupefaction only irritated me further. “What, do you take me for a fool? You think I haven’t noticed the two of you flirting all week? It’s obvious.”
She looked up and down the empty walkway and lowered her voice. “I wasn’t trying to hide anything from you.”
I raised my hands, unable to stop the words from tumbling out. “You don’t want anyone to hear your secrets, but you let me fall asleep in front of everyone,” I snapped.
“Can we talk about this inside?” she begged.
“No.” I stood my ground. “I’m going to get something to eat because someone didn’t wake me for dinner.”
“It’s going to rain,” she said, indicating the clouds hovering over the resort.
I held out my hand. “My pills.”
She sighed. “Which do you need?”
“All of them.”
“You know it’s not time,” she protested.
“They’re my pills,” I hissed. “Hand them over.”
She fished in her bag––an expensive YSL tote I gave her, coming up with the little blue leather pouch that held my pills. “Please don’t do anything stupid.”
“I’m not a child.” I shoved the bag in my purse, then turned on my heel and marched down the pier. “Do you have a key?” she hollered after me.
“Don’t need one,” I called over my shoulder. “You’ll be home to let me in. And make sure you feed and walk Mary Elizabeth.”
I chuckled to myself as I tromped across the sand and threaded my way between the up-lit palm trees toward the restaurant. Any
