“Does he use condoms with you?” I asked.
“Yes,” she answered quickly, then paused, thinking. “He’s supposed to. But I’m asleep, so…”
We sat in silence for a moment, both of us realizing that he wasn’t using condoms. “I’m trying to get a down payment for a place for my daughter and me,” she offered. “I’m mostly a dancer, but that can’t last forever, and I thought if I had a nest egg, it could cover the thin times while I learned to do something else.”
I didn’t know what to say. Her story was trite; I’d heard versions of it the handful of times I’d been in strip clubs, and always supposed it to be something the girls made up to get the guys to give them more money. But as it passed her lips, my heart went out to her, and I felt like a total bitch for having assumed all those other girls were lying. Well, probably some of them were, but I didn’t think this one was.
Again she tried to stand, this time becoming so dizzy she dropped to her knees on the plush carpet before I could catch her. “You shouldn’t drive yet,” I said as I helped her back into the bed. “I’ll get you something to eat.”
“You’re so nice.” She smiled. “I always thought you’d be nice.”
Downstairs I made us a flatbread and texted Cole that I’d found his whore in our bed and he should plan on sleeping elsewhere tonight. I poured myself a glass of wine and lit the half a joint I found in the ashtray, both of which I finished while the pizza cooked.
When I came back upstairs, I found her dozing again. I couldn’t help but notice how long her lashes were as I shook her shoulder, realizing I didn’t even know her name. She roused more easily this time and smiled when she saw me. “What’s your name?” I asked.
“Iris.” Her hand flew to her mouth. “Don’t tell Cole. He thinks I’m Barbie.”
I laughed. “Barbie? Really? He can’t possibly think your name is really Barbie.”
She shrugged. “You wouldn’t believe how many guys have Barbie fantasies. It must be something left over from childhood.”
I rolled my eyes. “Men.”
“Tell me about it,” she agreed.
We talked lightly as we ate on my bed with the tray between us, and she seemed to feel better with the food. It was odd though. I’d been working since I was so young that I’d never had many female friends, but this wasn’t like getting to know a new female costar or the girlfriend of one of Cole’s friends; there was something charged about our interaction. After dinner, we watched a show on HBO that turned explicitly sexual in a matter of minutes.
“I wonder if they get off sometimes,” she said, watching two girls and a guy fondle one another on a bed bedecked with furs.
“It’s usually pretty awkward with the crew in the room—and lights and privacy covers and getting the right angle,” I said. “Plus, for some reason, they always seem to shoot love scenes in the first days, before you’ve even had a chance to get comfortable with your costar. But when you have chemistry with the other actor, it can be…different.”
“You looked like you were into it with Cole. I got turned on watching that scene where you’re in that hotel. You were so sensual.”
The heat rose in my cheeks. “Yeah,” I admitted. “Cole and I…Well, back when we first met, we were superhot for each other and we didn’t always wear the protective coverings when we did our love scenes. Sometimes…well, it wasn’t totally professional. I can’t believe I’m telling you this.”
Her gaze rested on me. “Naughty.”
I felt flushed. “I’ve been traveling all day,” I said. “I could use a shower.”
“Why don’t you make it a bath?” she asked, her eyes locked on mine. “I could use one as well.”
There was nothing innocent in her suggestion. My breath grew shallow. I’d had threesomes with Cole on occasion and enjoyed it more than I cared to admit, but I had never been with a woman solo. This was before it was cool to be something other than straight, especially for a known actress. But I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t attracted to her, and what would be the harm? It wasn’t like I was cheating, really. My husband had been with her this very afternoon. It would be like a threesome, only at different times.
“Okay,” I breathed.
I got up and walked to the bathroom, and she followed. Nervous, I dimmed the lights, started the water running, and went around lighting all the candles I’d put out as decoration and never used, as a way of distracting myself. When I turned around, she was again naked, standing before me in all her glory. “First time?” she whispered.
I nodded. “Are you…often with women?”
I cringed at how inexperienced I sounded, but she was unfazed. “I prefer women.” She smiled. “Men are work.”
She approached and grazed my body with hers as she untied my wrap dress and pushed it off my shoulders. I was glad I’d worn my La Perla, in anticipation of seeing Cole. But it didn’t stay on for long. “You’re so beautiful,” she murmured before she touched her soft lips to mine.
The next few hours were a revelation to me. I’d always liked sex just fine, but I’d never known it could be what she showed me. Where I’d thought I would hook up with a woman to see what it was like, I discovered a whole new side of myself I didn’t even know I was missing.
When she left at midnight to go home to her daughter, I asked her to please stop using the heroin, promising I would pay for rehab if she couldn’t. “I know Cole’s paying you a lot, but please…” I begged. “I’ll pay you more.”
“I don’t want you to pay me,” she said. “And I’ll stop seeing Cole altogether if it
