“I am not an object. I am allowed to leave. I am allowed to have what I want.”
Sin rolled his eyes, and ran his hand through his hair, leaving it artfully messy. Sophie yearned to touch it. To touch him. She wanted the connection, even though she was angry at him. “Sure, yeah. I get it. But you didn’t even talk to us. You didn’t tell us what you wanted.”
She wanted to yell at him, wanted to deny his words, but he was right. She did run. It sort of humbled her. But she couldn’t ignore her needs.
“Like you would have listened? You do what you want. Don’t pretend.”
Thane chuckled behind her, the vibrations moving straight to her crotch. Did he find it funny that she fought with Sin? He was probably used to doing the same.
“True… but you didn’t give me a chance! No, I’m not going to pretend to be someone I’m not. I wouldn’t ask you to be more outgoing, to go out partying. But I will do whatever it takes to get what I want.” Maybe he wouldn’t ask her to change. Maybe she shouldn’t ask him to either. But that didn’t mean that they could make a relationship work.
“And you want my body.” She knew that that was what he liked most, it was all he had talked about since they met, but she was more than a body.
She wanted to be accepted for her whole being, not just one part.
“Well, yeah!” Every time her brain tried to tell her that there was something between them, his words shot her down again. “But I like other things about you too. If it was just your body, then I could find another similar. I could find someone else. Why would I track you down for something so basic? I mean, amazing, but I have sex all the time. I don’t ever chase anyone.”
Maybe he wasn’t being cruel because of his ego. Maybe he, too, wanted to be desired completely and thoroughly. Maybe he had been just as insecure and scared as she was.
When she didn’t respond, Sin sat on the table in front of her, leaning towards her. “I know I suck. I don’t talk about feelings. I don’t tell you that your brain is as big as your tits, or that I like your personality as much as your sweet body. I need my ass kicked sometimes. I do care about you, and as much as I want to tie you to a bed and keep you there forever, Death reminded me that you deserve a choice. Do you want to safe-word out, or are you going to let us take care of you? I’ll follow Dom rules this time! Put your needs and safety first.”
That was the question. He had brought up some valid points. He explained so much. He had opened up a part of himself that she didn’t know was there.
But it didn’t take away the issues either.
“This wasn’t a miscommunication, Adrian. You were cruel, you hurt me emotionally. I need more.” She did want to try. She did want to see where this went. She wanted more of them, of how they made her feel, but she needed forever.
She needed stability now that she had a baby to think about.
But she didn’t know them well enough. She didn’t know herself well enough.
“What do you want? What do you need?” Sin took her hands in his. “I’m sorry that I didn’t give you a safe-word last time. I’m sorry that I was mean, and took things too far. That’s not what BDSM is about and I let my emotions get the better of me. A Dom’s job is to be fully in tuned with what their sub needs that so that they can provide it. I did a shitty job, but I’ll try to be better. I’ll be an open book!”
“Just ask. We will answer.” Thane told her.
Did they really mean that?
Would Thane really answer anything? There was so much about them that she wanted to know! What was it like to be a Warrior Angel? What things had Thane saw? And what was it like to Fall? Sin had mentioned that it had been traumatic for Thane, but what really happened?
She wanted to know everything!
But she didn’t know where to start.
Sophie took a breath and let it out slowly. If they were willing to try. If they were willing to make this work than she would have to be too.
Maybe they wouldn’t have forever. Maybe it wouldn’t be a long term thing but she was going to give them a chance. And then, before the baby was born, she’d have to make a decision.
“I have one more question. This baby doesn’t mean that you can’t have sex, right?”
Sophie laughed silently. Leave it to Sin to focus on the carnal matter.
32
“Yes we can, but I’m too tired. Can we just go to sleep?” Sophie asked and Thanatos realized that they needed to take care of their sub. It was not enough to explain the main points of BDSM, they had to show her as well.
He had always believed that actions were more important than words.
“I guess” Adrian responded, adding a pouty sound to his voice.
He understood how the man felt. Not only was there a sexual component, there was an intimacy that cemented their relationship. He wanted the closeness after the argument.
Just holding her was a relief. He liked her weight in his arms, the warmth and the softness against his skin. He liked knowing that she wanted to be there, and he would enjoy being closer.
“Shower first,” Thanatos said, seeing a good opportunity.
Sophia turned and smiled at him, and her
