‘Go on then. If you must,’ I grumbled, offering her my cheek.
Silence. I turned to see why the dreaded kiss hadn’t been delivered but the moment I looked at Mum she burst out laughing.
‘What’s so funny?’ I frowned.
‘You are, my darling.’ Mum put me in a bear hug and kissed my cheek like she was trying to burrow her lips into it. Jeez!
‘Make sure you set your alarm so you’ve got plenty of time for a wash before school.’ Mum stood up and headed for the door.
‘I’m not going to bed yet, Mum. I’m coming downstairs for a while to watch telly.’
‘Just for a little while. You’ve got school tomorrow.’ Mum wagged her finger. Her hand dropped to her side and she smiled. ‘You’ve got school tomorrow . . . I like the sound of that!’
‘So do I!’
Mum headed downstairs with me following close behind her. Halfway down the stairs, Mum stopped so abruptly that I almost collided with her.
‘Cal?’
‘Yes, Mum?’
‘You . . . you mustn’t think I’m not proud of you, ’cause I am.’
‘I know, Mum,’ I said.
Mum carried on walking downstairs. I thought about what she’d just said. The funny thing was, until she said it, I didn’t think she was proud of me. In fact, part of me still suspected that Mum would’ve rather I’d failed the Heathcroft High entrance exam. But I hadn’t. I’d passed. And no-one could take that away from me. I’d passed.
We walked into the downstairs room. Lynette and Dad sat on the sofa. Jude sat at the dinner table poring over what looked like a map – not that I was particularly interested. Mum sat down next to Dad and I sat next to Lynette. It was a squash but a cosy squash.
I looked at my sister. ‘You OK?’
Lynette nodded. Then a slow-burning frown spread out over her face. And that look was back in her eyes. My heart plunged down to my shoes and bounced back up again.
Please, Lynette. Not tonight . . . not now . . .
‘Lynny, d’you remember my seventh birthday?’ I began desperately. ‘You took me to see my first film at the cinema. There was just you and me and you got annoyed with me because I wouldn’t take my eyes off the screen, not for a second. D’you remember you told me that I could blink because the screen wasn’t about to vanish. Lynny . .?’
‘Why am I here?’ My sister’s troubled grey eyes narrowed. ‘I shouldn’t be here. I’m not one of you. I’m a Cross.’
My stomach lurched, like I was in a lift which had suddenly plunged down at least fifty storeys in about five seconds flat. Every time I convinced myself that Lynette was getting better, she’d get that look on her face . . . She’d stare at us like we were all strangers and she’d insist she was one of them.
‘What’re you talking about. You’re a nought,’ Jude said with scorn. ‘Look at your skin. You’re as white as the rest of us. Whiter.’
‘No, I’m not.’
‘Jude, that’s enough,’ said Dad.
‘No, it’s not. I’m fed up with this. Keeping Lynette in this house so she won’t embarrass us by telling everyone she’s a Cross. She’s barking mad, that’s what she is. And Callum’s just as bad. He thinks he’s better than us and as good as the Crosses, even if he doesn’t say it.’
‘You don’t know what you’re talking about,’ I hissed.
‘No? I’ve seen you looking up at this house when you’ve come back from your dagger friend. I’ve seen you hating it and hating us and hating yourself because you weren’t born one of them,’ Jude spewed out. ‘I’m the only one of the three of us who knows what he is and accepts it.’
‘Now listen here, you brainless . . .’
Jude sprang out of his chair, but only a couple of seconds before I did.
‘Come on then, if you reckon you’re hard enough,’ Jude challenged.
I stepped forward but Dad got between the two of us before I could do little more than clench my fists.
‘See?’ Lynette’s small, puzzled voice rang out as clear as a bell. ‘I don’t behave like that. I can’t be a nought. I just can’t.’
All the fight went out of me. Slowly, I sat back down again.
‘Listen, Lynette . . .’ Mum began.
‘Look at my skin,’ Lynette spoke as if Mum hadn’t. ‘Such a beautiful colour. So dark and rich and wonderful. I’m so lucky. I’m a Cross – closer to God . . .’ Lynette looked around at all of us and smiled. A broad, beaming, genuinely happy smile that lit every line and crease of her face and squeezed my heart.
‘Stupid cow,’ Jude muttered.
‘That’s enough!’ Dad shouted at him.
Jude sat, a sullen, brooding look on his face. Lynette looked down at her hands stroking one over the other. I looked too. All I could see were pale white hands, blue veins clearly visible through the almost translucent skin. She looked up at me and smiled. I smiled back. Forced it really, but at least I tried.
‘Don’t you think I’m beautiful, Callum?’ Lynette whispered.
‘Yes,’ I replied truthfully. ‘Very.’
five. Sephy
I looked out of the car window, watching the trees and fields and sky melt and merge into each other in a passing blur. The first day of term. I sat up straighter, a smile of pure happiness creeping across my face. Callum . . . He alone made the first day of term new and exciting and different.
‘OK back there, Miss Sephy?’
‘Fine thanks, Harry.’ I directed my smile at our nought driver. He was watching me via the driver’s interior mirror.
‘Nervous?’
I laughed. ‘Are you kidding?’
‘I guess not,’ Harry replied ruefully.
‘Harry, could you drop me . .?’
‘Off around the corner from school.’ Harry finished for me.
‘If that’s OK.’
‘Well, it’ll have to be – won’t it?’ Harry
