No. It was enough. It was.
Maybe if he told himself that enough times, he’d start to believe it.
Erin, bless her, always found a way to distract him from his heavy thoughts. “Oh, I forgot to tell you. Jordan moved out this morning.”
“I thought she was staying in the apartment until the New Year?” Gavin mused.
Erin shrugged. “Decided she wanted to spend the holidays with her new beau at their place.”
“Are we taking bets on how long it takes until the relationship fails and she comes back?” Oliver asked, completely ready to put money down on it. The gambling gene ran deep in the Collins family.
Erin shook her head. “Hell no. I’m not doing that again. I’m putting out feelers for a new roommate on Monday. Jordan needs to learn she can’t keep screwing me like this. She falls in love in a hot minute, moves in with the loser, falls out of love in the next minute, then comes back to me with her tail between her legs, begging for her old room. Do you know how many months’ rent she’s screwed me out of with this game? I can’t afford her anymore.”
Oliver nodded, feigning support, even as he knew Erin’s words were merely bravado. There wasn’t a doubt in his mind she’d take Jordan back because Erin had a heart as big as New York and softer than a marshmallow.
“You know, you could always give up your place and move in here with us.”
If he’d been a smart man, he would have broached that subject with Gavin first, and privately, but he’d had one too many mugs of eggnog, and his mouth was working faster than his brain. Still, neither he nor Erin missed the sudden change in expression on Gavin’s face.
He had to hand it to his foster brother. He schooled it quickly, but for a split second, there was no missing the frown…or was it a scowl?
Shit.
Luckily, Erin knew how to save him from himself. “Hell no. Y’all are slobs, and while I don’t mind visiting this testosterone-laden abode from time to time, it’s nice to have a chance to escape it at the end of the day.”
“Speaking of escapes,” Gavin added. “I’m done in. Think I’ll call it a night. See you in the morning.” He rose from the recliner, carrying his empty mug to the kitchen.
Neither Oliver nor Erin spoke until they heard him walk down the hall, closing his bedroom door behind him.
“Oops,” Oliver mumbled.
Erin shook her head, but her gentle smile told him she wasn’t mad at him. It was one of the things he loved the most about her. She was slow to anger, quick to forgive, and the most patient person he’d ever known. He’d dated enough high-maintenance women to appreciate Erin’s easygoing approach to life. “I know you say you’ve moved on, Ollie—”
“I have moved on.”
Erin shook her head, refusing to accept what they both knew was a lie. “I know what you want, but Gavin doesn’t want the same.”
“I don’t—” he started.
She cut him off with a wave of her hand. “You’ve said I’m enough, Ollie. And I believe you. But I also know there’s still a part of you that longs for more. You don’t have to hide that from me.”
Oliver ran his hand through his hair, frustrated. “Erin,” he started.
“Don’t,” Erin cut in. “Don’t pretend for me. We’ve been together long enough that I know you still harbor that dream of a relationship like the one your parents share. And I also know you keep trying to put me and Gavin in those roles.”
Oliver shook his head, refusing to admit that because he didn’t want to hurt her, didn’t want her to think that what they shared wasn’t enough for him. He’d already lost Gavin to this dream. He couldn’t lose her too.
Part of him wondered if his inability to accept his dreams couldn’t come to fruition was hindered by Erin and Gavin’s friendship. It was so genuine, so close. When he’d first started dating Erin, it hadn’t taken long to know she was special, different from the women he’d dated before.
Gavin had realized—even before Oliver—that Erin was going to stick. The first couple of months had been touch and go as Gavin’s mood whenever Erin was around plummeted, his foster brother acting like a grade-A moody, sullen asshole. It had gotten so bad that Oliver had even briefly considered breaking things off with her, hating the feeling of having to choose between his girlfriend and his best friend.
In the end, it had been Erin who’d turned the tide. She’d looked right at Gavin shortly before Valentine’s Day last year and asked him point-blank why he didn’t like her.
Gavin hadn’t had an answer, at least not one he was willing to confess. He’d closed down in true Gavin style, reverting to character, and Oliver had stepped in to whisk Erin away before she pushed him too far.
However, Erin stood her ground and asked Gavin to give her a chance—a real chance—and to Oliver’s surprise, his friend had apologized for acting like a jerk and agreed.
After that…things got a lot easier.
At least for Erin and Gavin.
They’d become such great friends that there were times when Oliver felt like the damn outsider. Not that he was complaining.
Much.
“Sometimes I wonder…” Erin said, pausing. She bit her lower lip, and Oliver got a sense she regretted what she’d just started to say. “Never mind.”
“You wonder what?” he pressed.
“I wonder if you and I had never met…if you and Gavin would have…”
Oliver sighed. There were no secrets between him and Erin. He’d fallen for her just as quickly as her roommate Jordan fell for her flavors of the month. Layla had introduced him to her cousin shortly after Erin had landed a nursing job at Johns Hopkins in the E.R., making the move from Philly to Baltimore. Oliver had taken one look at the curvy brunette with chocolate-brown eyes and known
