I stand up and drop my plate into the sink, half-eaten food flopping into the basin. I sneer. This is my life now. This little fucking safe house on the edge of the city and suburbs in a poor middle-class section, so as to be as inconspicuous as possible. My family fought hard for power and wealth. I had it all, and now I’m walking across a fucking linoleum floor in a room with water stains on the ceiling and rats scurrying in the walls.
I walk back into the living room and drop onto a hideous, decrepit couch. It wheezes under my weight, like it’s every bit as exhausted as I’m. Eitan glances up at me from a map spread over the rickety kitchen table.
“We don’t have a lot of men left. I think whoever’s here already is all we’re going to get.” His jaw clenches, his fingers drumming against the arm of the velvet chair. “Nikita, I’m not sure how we’re going to get out of this. Even the council has turned its back.”
The frustration builds and I think I might explode. I want to shout, have a tantrum, and beat my hands on the ground like a toddler. I want to vent, let it out. Above all, I want to wring the life from Gino’s throat.
Instead I take a deep breath. Acting like a child will get me nowhere. Once, I was on top. All- powerful. I need to become that cruel and calculated person once again, and take back what is mine.
“Run me through the list of what’s left,” I order, closing my eyes. I need to think.
“Now that the laundromat on 5th has been burned out, we’re down to the electronics shop on Haven Boulevard, a stolen goods fence working out of the back of his van on Columbus and Rio, and two street gangs on corners in Los Arcos neighborhood, who are moving what little molly and cocaine they manage to scrounge up. We’re running out of resources, Nikita.”
“Tell me something I don’t know,” I sigh.
“And even the ones we have left aren’t going to last. The corner kids are getting jumped every other day. They know we can’t protect them anymore. I wouldn’t be surprised if they cut and run soon. One of Gino’s lieutenants even killed a runner yesterday. A little kid. Nine years old.”
Fuck.
I did everything right—everything—and still this place is a goddamn mess. My father must be rolling in his grave. I lost everything he built, everything he sacrificed for. All because I let my guard down. I should’ve seen it coming. Shouldn’t have gotten so comfortable. My palms rub up and down my face as if I can make the failure disappear. “What about the men? The soldiers, I mean.”
“Whoever is here are the only ones confirmed alive. A few reports of others who are holed up or left the city, but nothing for certain, and they aren’t likely to come out of their holes anytime soon. You can’t blame them, sir.”
“What about the other families? Has anything changed there?”
Eitan leans back and laces his fingers behind his head, exhaling in a slow, soft whistle. I know he’s tired; we’ve been working all hours of the day and night since the moment he picked me up from the mountain. The bags under his eyes are growing. “Most are staying out of it. We just got word today that the Mendoninos took over some territory of ours near the docks, so they’ve made their choice, apparently. The East Side Boys have passed along some useful information, but they’re not going to cross Gino, especially not now that he’s equipped with the remainder of our weapons import left over after he sold the bulk of it to the cartel. We need to face the reality, Nikita: we’re outnumbered, out-armed, and outmaneuvered. I just don’t see a way out, try as I might. You need to consider fleeing.”
“Don’t ever say that word to me again, Eitan. I’m not running from my city like a fucking coward.”
Eitan sighs and nods solemnly. “I know, Nikita. I just wish you would.”
I stand and go over to him. He’s been working his fingers to the bone, all for the sake of my family. “I’m sorry, my friend,” I rasp. “I owe you better than my anger.”
He looks up at me, dog-tired but eternally loyal. “I swore to your father that I’d protect you, Nikita. It seems I’m failing.”
I slump into the seat across from him and scan the map of the city for the umpteenth time. It is littered with red Xs and outposts circled and then crossed off. Death and destruction at every intersection, every depot I once controlled. The last remaining territory is where we are now. Enemy arrows are aimed at us from all directions.
We’re sitting ducks.
I wonder what my father would say if he saw me right now. He’s dead, buried six feet under the ground, and yet I can almost feel the weight of his sadness. I’ve stumbled so far from the course my father set. And what bothers me most is that I don’t know how far I’m destined still to fall.
“We have scouts on the college campus keeping an eye on movements near Gino’s headquarters. The school, at least, seems safe enough for now. If anything happens there, the police and government will be on it. They’re keyed up as well. Too many bodies in the news lately,” Eitan says.
The moment he mentions the college, my thoughts go to Annie. Who am I kidding? One of the reasons I haven’t been sleeping well is because I can’t stop thinking about her. Wondering if she’s safe. Wondering what she’s doing. And wondering if she’s even thinking about me.
“Nikita?” Eitan’s voice cuts into his thoughts.
“Just thinking about ... nothing, actually. I want those men to stay posted there. At the very least,
