As soon as the entire family is out the door, I head to the office. Asher is there. Thank fuck. I don’t bother stopping before I walk in and shut the door. “I need to talk to you.”
He barely looks up from his computer. “What’s up?”
I pause for a second. “I might have fucked up.”
Asher does look up then, eyes scanning me from head to toe. “You don’t seem drunk, and I don’t see any broken bones, so what exactly have you fucked up?”
“I slept with Erin O’Neill last night,” I say.
Asher just stares at me, his mouth slightly open in shock, so I keep going.
“And again this morning. Her parents might have walked on in on her screaming my name, and I might have told them that we’re engaged in order to make it seem less bad.”
Another agonizing silence. And then Asher bursts out laughing. Not a little laugh, a deep laugh that’s so forceful he’s nearly lying down on his desk. “Oh my God.” He can’t stop, and I have to smile a little. I know that he’s not actually laughing at me. It’s just a little ironic considering the way he met Rose.
He slept with her when she was on a tour, found out she was actually here to spy for her scummy father, and married her to blackmail her into doing the right thing. In the process of all that, they fell in love, and they stayed married. Now they’re the most sickeningly happy people that I know. Besides Leo and Diana.
“I know.”
“This is perfect. Does Leo know?”
I shake my head. “Haven’t had the chance to tell him.”
“He’s going to laugh too.”
“Probably louder than you.” I roll my eyes.
Asher is actually tearing up, and he wipes his eyes before gathering himself. “You know I can’t scold you for shit. But seriously, man, go for it. After Rose, I don’t doubt that when love hits, it hits, and we all want you to be happy. Besides, when it does hit, that’s the end of it.”
“Wait a second,” I say, holding my hand out. “This isn’t love. I just told you so that you and Leo and the girls don’t let the cat out of the bag the rest of the weekend while I’m pretending to be engaged to her.”
My friend smirks. “Whatever you say, man. Rose and Diana are down in the city. I’ll let them know when they get back. And Leo, when he’s not on the river.”
“Thanks.”
“Sure thing. And Hudson, if you need anything from us, just tell us. We’ve been there. We know how it goes.”
I shake my head again. “It’s not the same, Asher.”
“Okay.”
“It’s not,” I say as I open the door and leave the office. “It’s not.”
I say the words to convince myself, but I’m not sure that I believe them.
9
Erin
How my parents ever really believed that I came here to do outdoor things is amazing to me. Hiking? Sure. Maybe archery. But white water rafting is definitely not my speed. It’s too chaotic and too loud, and by the time that the three-hour trek down the river is done and we’re driving back to the launch point, I’m exhausted.
It’s not like I got the best sleep last night either.
The entire time that we were on the river I could feel my parents watching me. But they didn’t ask me anything because I’d asked them to keep things quiet. So now that we’re back, I’m completely unsurprised when they pull me aside to speak with me alone. Hudson isn’t here, and I can tell that they’ve been dying to talk to me alone since the moment they left my guest house this morning.
“Are you okay, Erin?” Mom asks.
We look a lot alike. We’re about the same height and both have red hair. When I was younger, there were a couple times that we were mistaken for sisters. But right now she’s looking at me with genuine concern. “Why wouldn’t I be okay?”
She just looks at me, still shellshocked. “I’m just so surprised. And I don’t understand why you felt that you couldn’t tell us. Did you think that we wouldn’t be supportive?”
I don’t know what to say to that because of course they would be supportive. When I didn’t get into vet school, they weren’t disappointed at all. They said that it would be nice to have me home for a while and that maybe we could plan a trip during the gap year. They said they knew how hard I’d worked and that I needed time off.
And I didn’t know how to handle it. I was so devastated and so disappointed. I didn’t know how to take a break. I still don’t. That’s why I’ve been at the clinic, hoping that the extra time and effort on my résumé will help me if my test scores are still too low next time.
It doesn’t matter that I’m speechless because my parents have plenty to say. “Of course it’s unexpected,” my dad says. “But I have to say that it’s not entirely unwelcome.”
Mom reaches out and takes my hand. “We’ve seen how unhappy and overworked you’ve been this last year. And all we want is for you to be happy. Even if you keep going and become a vet, we hope that this will make you happy.”
“I—”
“Have you and Hudson set a date? I think this could be a really beautiful place for a wedding if you wanted to do it here.”
“Obviously we don’t know Hudson well and we want to spend some time with him,” my dad says. “But so far he’s struck me as responsible and kind. That’s something that I can live with.”
We’re walking back towards the main lodge, and Mom slings her arm over my shoulders. “When we get back, should we schedule appointments to look at dresses? That could be fun, right? Maybe we could go to a few places. And the minute that he gets you a
