We held hands. Not in the fun, playful way we had before on numerous times. But tight and secure because we knew this would be the last time we’d be able to touch each other. Tommy’s life, and death, on Earth had run out. We both knew it was time for him to go. He was able to move on now.
I licked at the raindrops trailing down my lips, trying to ignore my heavy heart. I knew he had to go. That knowledge did not make me any less sad. He was my best friend. The one who saw the real me. Despite any attempts by me to conceal my true thoughts and emotions. I was free with him. More freedom than with anyone in my life. I didn’t know who’d helped who more, him or me. In our five-month friendship, I thought I’d grown up more than I had in the past few years. I had to let him go. But how?
He squeezed my hand. We stopped, and I turned to him. His hair hung in his eyes like it always did. I reached out and smoothed it back. I remembered reading a book a few years ago about a pair of best friends. They told each other everything, their thoughts and secrets. And I, even though I’d never admit it, wanted a friendship like that. But this wasn’t the relationship Tommy and I had created. We didn’t need to tell each other our secrets, although we did needlessly. We instinctively knew one another’s secrets and hidden thoughts. Nothing to work at, just a bond between each other we both felt intensely.
“I’ll miss you so much.” My voice caught with emotion.
We both stepped off our respective tracks, standing in the middle. I fell into his arms, and he hugged me close. Our bodies intertwined as one being, just for a moment.
He whispered in my ear, “I love you, Emily. You’re the most beautiful part of my life. I don’t want to leave you, either. But I must.”
Tears streamed down my face. “I love you, Tommy. A little piece of my heart will always belong to you.”
He looked into the darkened sky. “Do you see it? The light?”
I stared, but all I saw were gray clouds and the slow rain increasing in intensity. “I don’t see it. But if you do, I guess it’s time for you to go.”
He kissed me. My first real kiss on the lips. “Goodbye, Emily.”
And he was gone.
***
I walked through the front door of our trailer with a surprisingly light heart. I’d stayed at the tracks for a few hours after Tommy had left. Making sure I got all my tears out. At least for now. I would likely have more later. The door slammed shut, and the pleasing aroma of food filled the small confines. Fried chicken.
A large bucket of Kentucky Fried sat on the kitchen table. Along with containers of biscuits, mashed potatoes, and gravy. Nick also stood in the middle of the kitchen, fixing a plate of food.
“Hey, Emily.” He handed me a plate. “You hungry?”
I was hungry. Starving even. I hadn’t eaten much the last few days with everything being so crazy. Fried chicken sounded good to me. Really good. Even if Nick was here. “Sure,” I said, accepting the plate.
Mom walked out from the living room, still in her bathrobe. “Nick was so nice to bring dinner over. Now we don’t have to eat Aunt Holly’s specialty again tonight.”
“I heard that!” Aunt Holly said. “Don’t you know that pizza is the world’s favorite food?”
“True,” Mom said with a grin. “But not every night, Hol.”
“You’ll never hear me complain about pizza for dinner every night,” Sam said, spooning a gigantic scoop of potatoes on his plate.
I smiled a real smile. Probably the first real smile in this new makeshift home of ours. Change still wasn’t something I liked. But something I could now accept.
I was home.
