Lucifer frowned, unsure of what Gallian was referring to, but Candace seemed to know.
“Thank you, Dad. I love you too.”
§
Candace sat in the corner of Fright Night with Jax. Both of them were silent. He eyed the vampires in the bar with irritation.
“Say something, Jax.”
“What do you want me to say? First, you tell me you’re going to marry some fae prince and we won’t be able to see each other often and now, you’re telling me you’ve fallen in love with the Devil and you’re going to return to Hell, permanently. What the fuck do I say to that?”
She flinched, wishing she hadn’t told Lucifer she’d be okay seeing Jax alone.
I knew he’d be pissed, but now I just feel like the world’s worst friend.
She’d tried her best to explain everything to him in a way he might understand.
“I thought you’d be happy I was finally honest with you.”
“Happy? I’m not fucking happy. You’ve avoided me since we returned to Earth and now you drop that bombshell on me like it’s no big deal.”
“I never said it wasn’t a big deal,” she muttered.
She knew telling Jax wasn’t going to be easy, but the way he looked at her as if she’d completely torn him to shreds made her heart ache. There was nothing more she wanted than for all of this to go away and for them to go back to the way they’d always been. She knew that would never happen, not after he’d sent her to Hell. The vast chasm between them widened significantly.
“I don’t understand how you can give up your entire life, everything you’ve ever known for… him.”
Is that how he saw it? Her giving up everything? That was ridiculous. She’d made this choice by herself. Even if Lucifer had asked her to stay with him in Hell a thousand times over, it wouldn’t have mattered if she hadn’t wanted to. She wasn’t giving up anything. She was gaining everything she never knew she needed. A man who was so complex it gave her whiplash with his ever changing moods. She accepted Lucifer for all he was regardless. Loved him for it. She still had so much to learn about what made him tick, but none of that mattered.
“Can you not see this is the one choice I’ve been able to make without someone forcing it on me? Finally taking back control of my life from my parents. Besides, Theodus is a prick and I deserve more than that.”
“And you think he’s any better?”
“What did you just say?”
“Come on, Candace, you’re talking about someone whose job it is to punish souls who have sinned. I wouldn’t even like to count the number of shitty things he’s done in his existence.”
She clenched her fists under the table.
Where does he get off saying shit like that? Does he think I’m unaware of what type of man Lucifer is? Does he even know me at all?
“So what, Jax? So fucking what. Do you think that means he doesn’t deserve me?”
“No one will ever deserve you.”
She almost reeled back. She hadn’t listened to Lucifer or her father about Jax having feelings for her, but she saw them clear as day in his expression now. How had she not realised this before?
“And you think you do?” she whispered.
He had the decency to look away, eyes full of regret. Her chest constricted painfully.
All this time. All this fucking time. Why? Why, Jax? This isn’t fair.
She’d never once looked at him as anything other than a brother figure. They’d grown up together. The thought of Jax seeing her as more made her stomach turn.
“What about Sam? Are you just stringing her along?”
“No. I love Sam.”
“Then what the fuck? How long have you felt this way about me?”
He let out a long, heart breaking sigh.
“Since we were kids.”
She didn’t even want to scream and rage at him. She wanted to cry. Betrayal crept into her heart. Her best friend had lied to her face for years. Their entire friendship felt tainted. A wave of nausea rushed through her. She put a hand to her mouth, standing up abruptly.
“Candace?”
She shook her head, backing away and running towards the toilets. The minute she slammed into a cubicle, the tide erupted. She could only be glad she’d braided her hair earlier so it wasn’t hanging in her face.
She sat back against the wall when she’d emptied her stomach, feeling completely drained.
There was nothing she could say to her best friend that would make anything better. How could she even face him again? Knowing he was in love with her. Knowing that he’d spent their lives hoping she’d see him as something other than her best friend.
What did he think would happen if I married Theodus? Is that why he tried to save me?
Everything he’d done for her was suddenly unpalatable. He could’ve had an ulterior motive. Her head started to hurt as all the possibilities ran through it.
I don’t want to think about this anymore.
She tugged her phone out of her pocket and sent a text.
‘Please come get me.’
She didn’t care if he said I told you so, all she wanted was to curl up in his arms and forget this ever happened. She promptly burst into tears, putting her head in her hands.
How could things between her and Jax ever be the same again?
Chapter Twenty Four
The wind ruffled his hair. Sitting up on the roof of Azrael’s building, Lucifer surveyed London with narrowed eyes. He hadn’t wanted to leave Candace alone, but she’d insisted.
That boy better not decide it’s mutual confession time.
Mall
