“No,” Matthew said. “No one's going. Staying. Together.” His mouth explored my neck, my ears, my chin, my lips.
A fire raged inside me. Every touch of tongue, skin, hand, cock sent desire through me. I wanted them, needed them like never before.
Lost in the pleasure, the touches, I didn't worry about returning the affections. I let them consume me, show me everything I'd have missed if I had left, if I had fucked up.
They tortured me with sensations until I couldn't stand it any longer. My control shattered. No one touched me where I craved it most. I needed them to take me, fill me. “Please.”
Matthew slid up my body. “Make love to me?”
I ran my hands through his dark hair and brought our mouths together, pleading the words over his lips. “Yes, Matthew. I need to be inside you. You feel amazing around me, under me, like no one before you, ever.”
Matthew rolled onto his back and brought me with him.
I reached for Richard and kissed him. “No one fills me like you do. No one makes me feel alive like you do.”
He moved closer. “The way you want me, the way you need, you both still drive me as crazy as the first night.” He wasn't the only one.
He reached for the lube and handed it to me. I slicked it into Matthew, using extra. I didn't want to touch my dick with it. I wanted Matthew's body to be the next touch to give me pleasure. I raised his legs and leaned over him, ready to enter his body, when Matthew put a hand on my lower abdomen, stopping me. The uncertainty in his dark eyes broke my heart.
“I swear, Matthew, I didn't. I've only been with you two since I moved in here. Hell, since the first night at the club.”
His expression relaxed, and his hand moved from my tense stomach muscles to my face. “I believe you. I do. I just needed to hear it again.”
“Are you sure?” Richard asked. “You shouldn't let him go bare unless you feel like you can trust him.”
“I do trust Luke. And I trust you. If you didn't think he was telling the truth, you wouldn't let him do me like this.”
Richard ran a hand along his jaw. “No, I wouldn't.”
My arms shook with the despair. I lowered my head and choked out the words. “Can you forgive me?”
Richard lifted my chin with one strong finger. “Already have. You didn't do anything. You stopped yourself. You called us.”
“Uh-huh.” Matthew rocked his hips, and my cock pushed into him. I groaned. To be so accepted, so wanted, it meant more than having the love of my parents, than having the pain I thought I needed.
I sank the rest of the way into him. Words flowed out of me, ripped through me like a tidal wave I couldn't dream of stopping. “I don't want anyone else to touch me. To fuck. To love me. No one but you.”
I rocked in and out of Matthew's body, and after a few thrusts, Richard pushed into me. Perfect, right, simple. Nothing to run from.
And everything to fight for.
Chapter Thirty-one
I awoke the next morning to two warm bodies surrounding me, arms holding me, lips still touching my skin.
I lifted my head and eyed the clock. Late. Not surprising for me, but Richard never slept in. The night before must have exhausted him as much as it had me. Then a thought pressed in through the sleepy haze.
I slipped out of the bed and threw on a pair of jeans. I descended the basement steps and opened the door to the small bedroom.
There were no chains affixed to the bed. No handcuffs. No ropes or ties in the cabinet. The only remaining evidence of the steel loops were the small holes on the walls and floor. The solitary remnant of bondage was the bench. Probably because Matthew loved it. He liked the way it forced us to be close and hold on to one another.
I sat on the bench.
“We're done with the restraints.” Richard stood in the doorway. He wore briefs and nothing else. Tension clung to every muscle.
“I think I am too.” I glanced around the room again and nodded. “It's done.”
He sat next to me and breathed deep. “I'm glad we're in agreement.” He looked away for a moment before continuing. “If I had thought you liked getting hit, getting flogged, that you wanted it, got off on it, then I might have done it. I think I would've liked it, knowing it made you hard, knowing you wanted to submit like that.”
“Bullshit. That isn't you. Besides, I was asking for all the wrong reasons. I knew you'd say no, even then.”
“Maybe you're right. I just... I want to be what you need.”
“You are. I always thought letting myself care about someone again would hurt. Not just because I'd lose him, but because caring would be painful.” I met his stare. “It isn't. Trying to leave you two. That was... it was impossible.”
“As it should be.” He bumped his shoulder with mine. “Did telling us about your father help?”
“Yeah. It doesn't feel as big now.”
“That's because you have us.” Matthew stood where Richard had been a moment before. He walked in and knelt in front of me. “What happened to you isn't a fear you should carry around. Like my dad and Richard's Gregg. They are pains of the past. Not what define our future together. What your father said fifteen years ago doesn't mean shit now.”
Said the kid who was eight at the time. How did he get so damn wise? I stroked his face with the back of my hand in a reverent touch. “When Richard talked about us getting together, he worried you were too young, like you hadn't been hurt by life. But you have. You just didn't let it change you. You kept laughing, kept
