He rolled me over in a quick flip that knocked the breath from my chest. He flattened his body over mine and kissed me again. The force of it filled me with an ache for more.
“I love you so damn much, Luke Moore.”
I held his face in my hands and pressed my forehead to his. “I... ”
His eyes scanned mine. His chest heaved with each breath.
“Richard, I— ”
He brought a finger to my lips. “Not yet. Not now. He should be here.”
I nodded.
We kissed and touched. Neither of us rushed to get off or make the moment about sex when it was about much more.
Eventually, Richard's hands stilled. He cleared his throat.
“What has he done?” I asked. I couldn't look at him.
A large thumb pushed at my chin until my eyes met his. “I like that you know me so well, but it makes it hard to break news to you gently. Sort of irritating in a way.”
I rolled us over and straddled his thighs. “I need to know. You're not the one who's hurting me. He is.”
“I know.” His tongue wet his lips. “Well, he's been busy.”
“Great.”
“There's some people who don't want to work with me anymore. They were interested before he talked to them.”
It was inevitable, but hearing it pissed me off. I had more to lose than ever before. My body shook, and the dread gripped my heart. I collapsed onto his chest.
He ran a hand over my back. “So what if he takes away some business? Big deal. I don't want to see him hurt you like this. It isn't worth it. I have you. That's what matters to me. You and Matthew. We're not letting him come between us. If I lost you that would be... ” Richard didn't finish his prediction.
I wrapped my arms tighter around him. “And if he killed his college friend?”
“Let's let Walter deal with that.”
“Maybe he'll come after us. You. Matthew.”
“I won't live my life in fear. If he's guilty of something, we have to have faith the police will handle it.”
“And until then?” I sat up. “I should go.”
Richard's hands tightened on my hips. “No.” He spat the word out in a curt, definitive tone. He wasn't going to argue with me on that point. “And no more investigating your father. He's dangerous. That's obvious.”
“All right.”
We held each other, my body draped over his, the Chinese food long forgotten, until Matthew came in the front door.
“Hey,” Matthew called out from the hall, his voice tense.
I lifted my head.
“What's wrong?” he asked.
“My father's messing with Richard's business again.” And then I saw it in his eyes. The light and fire were muted. “What's wrong with you?”
Richard reacted to my words. He rolled over as I moved off him.
Matthew shifted on his feet, and his body vibrated. Anger. I'd seen it once before.
Richard stood. “Matthew?”
I went to him. “What is it?” I placed a hand on his arm and tried to calm him.
“My mom had a visitor yesterday. He said he was a friend of mine. He told her I was going to hell, said he knew how to make me better, make me see how wrong I've been. He told her about a place where I could get healthy again.”
“Goddammit.” I headed for the door.
Richard grabbed my arm. “Where do you think you're going?”
“This has to stop.”
“Let's give it some time. See what Walter can find out.” He steered me to the couch. They sat on either side of me.
Matthew wrapped his arms around me and kissed my cheek. “I'm not going anywhere. Nothing he says or does will make me leave you.”
Nothing?
I trusted Matthew, but I'd never trust my father. What could he do to make Matthew leave me? I didn't want to know.
Richard placed a hand on my thigh. “He was at your mom's?” he asked Matthew.
“Not his father. When I asked her what the man looked like, it didn't sound like him. This was someone else. Younger, tall, dark haired. She said he was good-looking, even pleasant at first.”
I pulled back from Matthew's embrace. “Fowler. My father's assistant.” I waved a hand in the air. “Lackey. Dirty-handed messenger. Call him what you'd like. He works for my father.”
Richard snorted. “Makes sense. Send someone else, never get his hands dirty. What did your mom say to him?”
A slow, satisfied smile spread across Matthew's face. “She threw his ass out, of course. She might be small, but she's tough when it comes to people telling her there's something wrong with me. She's a member of PFLAG for God's sake. He had no idea what he was up against.” He paused. “It pissed me off is all. I know he was after you with this stunt, but she's my mom. This has nothing to do with her.”
“I'm sorry.” I feared I'd be saying those words more and more over the coming months, maybe years. The realization pressed heavy on my chest.
My father could not run for president. He didn't deserve it. And we didn't deserve the agony.
Matthew took my face in his hands. “Don't ever apologize for him. You didn't make him who he is. You didn't ask for him to hurt you and everyone else in the process. He can try to get rid of us all he wants. We're not going anywhere.”
“That's what I said.” Richard kissed Matthew and then me.
Matthew nuzzled my cheek. His eyelashes brushed over my skin. “I love you. It'll be okay. I promise.”
All I could say in response was, “I'm afraid of what he'll do next.”
Chapter Thirty-six
I glanced at the printout once more, tucked it in my pocket, and smiled. I hadn't had anything to be excited about since my father's threats came to light. It felt good to think of something positive instead of the anger looming over every other moment.
Matthew's laptop would arrive in one week. I couldn't wait. It should shock the shit out of him.
“Luke.”
I glanced up.
Matthew weaved through the crowd on the train,
