“I’m not sure where his feelings are for you right now, but he certainly knows you exist. I’m picking up on a lot of platonic love and friendship, but at the present time, that’s all,” I say, opening my eyes.
Lenny smiles, tears on the verge of welling over.
“He knows I exist?”
“Yes, he really does,” I say nodding.
“Thank you, Diana—thank you. Thats really all I needed,” he says, smiling. Creases form in the corners of his eyes, brightening his face.
“Now, if you can kick the… eh-hem… bad habit at work, you’ll be in a better place. I feel if you continue down that path, you’ll lose your chance with Andrew. And for sure your job.”
His eyes widen.
“Whoa. You picked up on his name? Please—please don’t tell the police,” he says.
“Everything here is confidential. I wouldn’t dream of intervening for something like this. It’s not my job,” I say, trying to reassure him.
“But you’re—you’re the one who helped find that little girl recently, right?” he says.
“I am, but that was a different type of situation. I was pulled in on the case. And your situation hardly requires me to step in for police interaction,” I say, cocking an eyebrow, “even if it’s totally not cool.”
Lenny nods vigorously, “I’m—I’ll stop. I’m done. I want my shot with Andrew.”
He stands up, brushing off his legs as he gets up, trying to decrease the wrinkles. It doesn’t help.
“Great. You’ll come back and keep me posted, right?” I say.
“Sure—sure, I’d love to,” he says, reaching for my hand again.
I take it, placing my other hand over his.
Instantly, a much happier future for him opens up. As if the pathway he was on was leading him down the destructive path to heartache, but in the past instant, he’s made a new decision—a life-altering decision. These are the types of interactions that are the reason I continue to do this. When you can see a life shift from destruction, to something far more pleasant.
It’s so strange how simple—and how difficult that is. Choice.
We’re always one choice away from a completely different life.
Smiling at him, I let go of his hand, and walk him out of the reading room and into the main part of the shop.
Renaldo looks up from the gossip magazine he was reading and feigns surprise—it’s written all over his face. He’s surprised I left my reading room “cave” to enter the real world of the store. When I can help it, I generally avoid the front because you never know who might see me and want to attempt to weasel their way into a free reading.
I roll my eyes and smirk.
“Okay, Lenny—Renaldo here will get you all squared away,” I say.
As soon as I look at Lenny, a cord of energy bursts from his chest, linking to Ren’s.
“You know what,” I say, looking between them, “Ren, I think you may be a good person to talk to Lenny. He doesn’t have many people he can turn to, but for some reason, I get a good vibe about you two.”
Renaldo looks surprised at first—his eyebrows flick upward—but he’s known me long enough to know when I say something like that, to go with it.
“Hmmm, okay, I’m intrigued,” Ren says, putting his magazine down and walking to Lenny. His flamboyant attitude is so similar to Andrew’s—at least from what I can tell—and it instantly puts Lenny at ease.
“I’m Renaldo, Diana’s boss—” he says, shooting me a coy grin.
“You wish,” I say, chuckling and heading back toward my reading room.
I leave the two of them alone, allowing them some space to have the conversation they need to have. It’s so interesting how this universe works sometimes. It all takes place in whatever orchestra its meant to—like every string is so carefully pulled so the timing is perfect.
I stop walking, surprised at my own train of thought—as if all of this is happening not just for Lenny—but for me as well. The color green floods my entire perception and I know it’s true. I’ve hunted for so long for clues of my past, but this is a mixed message—like it’s made with invisible ink and if I look at it to long, it will all melt away.
But what exactly is meant to be?
Am I supposed to be making the choice to be happy? To help Blake on this case? To—ugh—give love a chance?
Again, green lights up. But not just for the last thought—for them all.
Dammit.
Fear unfurls from my stomach again—twisting and turning. Being hard is easy. Having a protective shell is pretty much my thing. But learning to let go of all that? Can I even handle it?
No—I’m not ready. Not yet.
As much as I want to move forward, there’s still so much from my past I need to have answered. I can’t let it go and become something new until I know what I was. Who I was. Why I’m here and stuck this way.
“Oh honey, I can totally help you with that,” Renaldo says to Lenny. His words pull me from my own thoughts.
“Really, you’d help me?” Lenny says, surprise painted in his tone.
“Are you kidding me? Taking on a project like you is a dream come true. We can go shopping—get this hair cut and—oh my God, a manicure. When was the last time you had you hands done?” Ren says, gasping.
I have to laugh to myself. If there’s one person who can whip Lenny into shape, it’s certainly Ren. And if he’s the one guiding him to Andrew—it’ll be perfect.
Sitting down at my desk, I reach for my phone.
Maybe I should call Blake. I don’t have to commit to anything but coffee, right?
I pick up the old-fashioned, corded receiver, then set it back down.
I don’t even have his number.
Placing my hand over my face, I chuckle to myself. What on earth was I thinking? It was like I was going to call
